


Missing Pieces: The Black Sheep

by cathelin



Category: Dark Angel
Genre: Big Bang Challenge, Canon Era, Canon Related, Dark Angel Big Bang, Friendship, Gen, Implied/Referenced Brainwashing, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Sex, Implied/Referenced Torture, Mental Health Issues, Mild Language, Military Background, Military Training, Original Character(s), POV Multiple, POV Original Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-01
Updated: 2015-02-02
Packaged: 2018-03-10 02:23:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 28
Words: 65,722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3273251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cathelin/pseuds/cathelin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As life for the Transgenics as they establish themselves in Terminal City comes together, Max and Alec receive a huge surprise. Set before the Jam Pony siege.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. X5-495

**Author's Note:**

>  
> 
>   
> 
> 
>   
> Written for the Dark Angel Big Bang 2014
> 
> AUTHOR: Cathelin  
> ARTIST: evian-fork/Ibrahil  
> BETA: pielover62  
> RATING: PG-12  
> PAIRING: None. Implied Max/Logan.  
> SPOILERS: Through Season 2 Ep 19: 'She Ain't Heavy'  
> WARNINGS: Occasional expletives. References to Psy Ops, child abuse, war, sex.  
> DISCLAIMER: I do not own Dark Angel the Series, the Books, or the characters. I do own my original characters. No profits made from this story.  
> FEEDBACK: Yes please.

    Ben watches from a shadowy corner of Crash, trying to go unnoticed by those that matter. Trying to keep himself still and quiet enough that they won’t notice him - but not so still as to draw attention to that very stillness. He avoids the notice of the Ordinaries close to his hiding place far more easily. If he was an Ordinary, there’s no way he’d go unmarked by them, not with his looks. But as a Transgenic, even one with his woefully reduced training, it is laughably easy. Plus, Ben was designed to be stealthy, with an uncanny ability to become almost invisible - an ability he knows he shares with a small number of his kind.

    He’s not the only Manticore born in Crash tonight. There are at least eight other Transgenics here – there's one X6, the others are X5s like Ben himself, but he may be wrong. To the untrained and ignorant eyes of the Ordinaries they appear no different from themselves - maybe a little, or a lot, better looking, with an appearance of being a little fitter, a little more graceful – but they tell themselves it's just because they're young and active bike messengers. However, to Ben’s observant and knowledgeable eye they stand out like pedigrees amongst a rabble of feral cats.

    His fellow Transgenics are attractive, graceful and fit, their bodies well muscled and strong. Their hearing is sharp, their eyes quick and alert, their sense of smell honed. They are intelligent and smart, wholly aware of themselves and almost infallibly aware of their surroundings. They perfume the air too, beneath the stench of weak beer and cigarettes and the sweat of the humans. Not only is there the clear aroma of the feline, the dominant splice in their genes, but he can smell some of the other animals mixed within their DNA cocktails. Also, there is the perception of wildness barely tamed and the scents of woodland and earth, of sea and wind, of mountains and pure clean water. It all conjures the feel of running with ones own kind, of fighting beside pack and kith, of curling up beside litter mates. Most striking of all to Ben’s senses is the sensation of being close to family.

   He can see Cece leaning against the bar talking to an X6. Of average height, Cece has pale skin and fair hair, her blue eyes her most striking feature. Her body is lean and willowy, her strength quiet - but he knows it's there. During those brief months between his return to training and the cauterization of the Seattle base he can remember her beating him to the mat in an embarrassingly short space of time on a number of occasions. Like many of the female X5s her appearance belies her Transgenic abilities, perhaps the only hints are in the strength of her jaw and the sculpted line of her high cheek bones. Cece is formidable, stubborn and sharp tongued, not at all reticent at putting her inferiors in their place – he'd seen her do so himself. One idiotic male in her Platoon made the unfortunate mistake of challenging her authority. Ben sure as fuck had no intention of making the same mistake, and he wasn‘t even in her Platoon.

   He watches her turn her head slightly away from the girl beside her and bite back a sharp edged grin at the action taking place near the pool table in the back room. The grin is echoed in smiles or smirks, eye rolls or a slight shake of the head from most of the other Transgenics in the room. Ben is one of only two not amused at the signs of a coming confrontation.

   A snort of bitter laughter catches his attention and his eyes turn to one of the Transgenic males - X5-511. Dark of hair and eye, coffee skinned Biggs has the kind of attractiveness that catches the eye for being understated - his features well balanced and handsome, his body sturdy and lean, his persona light and engaging, an aura of calm and charm around him. Ben has seen him calm down a potentially violent situation until the warring Xs were laughing and smiling together as they walked away, all in less than ten minutes.

   He’s also seen him fierce with an anger and loyalty that, for many reasons, sparked an answering loyalty in Ben. He can see hints of those emotions in Biggs’ face right now as he turns away from the pool table and back to the girl hanging off his arm - maybe Ben isn’t the only one outside of the approaching hostilities who is less than amused. He glances back towards Cece and the girl with her - no, he’s not the only one after all.

   His eyes track between each of his fellow Transgenics in the room, noting the barely there tension in their body language, most of them amused in one way or another, though for most that amusement is far from light hearted. It was the amusement at someone else’s foolishness, at someone playing with the unaware, at the prey thinking it's the predator at the hunt, at waiting for the shit to hit the fan - a little smug, a little angry and bitter, and a whole lot cynical.

 Ben takes the time to sweep the room again looking to see if anyone else shows that same slight tension and dark amusement. There, another three Xs he hadn’t recognised, an X5, an X6 and one who may even be an X4. That brought their number up to an even dozen including himself - that may be why he hasn’t been noticed by any one of them, even by the One of them. Good.

   X5-698 catches his attention where the older man is leaning casually against the rail. While he's aware of everything around him he seems to be totally ignorant of the group of women trying desperately to catch his attention. Ben follows his flickering eyes to the ruggedly handsome black man some 10 feet away. Ah, Ben smirks slightly, he'd heard about 698's abject failure in the Breeding Program, this explains why. While the majority of X5s swing both ways, there are enough that are straight or gay so that it isn't quite an X5 characteristic. How the geneticists had managed to ensure that so many of them were bisexual was just one of their little mysteries. The why was much more straight forward - they had all been trained to see sex and sexuality as just another tool in their already formidable arsenal, being bisexual just made it easier.

   It's not long before Ben finds his eyes drawn inexorably back across the room in time to see, as well as hear, the not so quiet exchange between the two who matter the most to him.

   **Max**. Unit mate. Childhood confidante. Beloved little 'sister'. His Maxie.  
   During his years on the outside the thought of her, the need to live for her memory, had sometimes been the only thing that kept him going through the long lonely days, weeks, months between Zack's fleeting check ups. Before the escape, he'd adored all of his younger unit sibs, but back then Max was his favorite just as she was Zack's: she and Jondy were the little girls of their family as Kavi was the baby boy. The three of them had been protected, spoiled and coddled by their elders – as much as such a thing was possible in the hell of Manticore. Away from the humans surrounding them, when Max was all sweet sassiness and vibrancy, she was their dark angel. Thinking she was dead, that they'd failed to protect her, it had near destroyed Zack and Ben both.

   _“God Alec, can't you ever take anything seriously? Grow up and stop being such a pain in my ass.”_

   The words filter through the crowded bar to Ben's ears pulling him from the glow of the memories of his unit, of his Max, the harshness in her voice making him wince. She continues quieter, for Transgenic hearing, and the cruelty of her words curdle the warmth in his chest.

 _“Anyone would think you were created just to screw up my life with your schemes.”_ Then louder again, _“No, shut up, I don't want to hear it.... I don't need to hear what or why, it'll be stupid and you'll botch it up anyway and I'll need to save your ass and fix your god-damn mess again.”_

   She's wrong. Ben knows she's wrong and he has to fight the urge to join in the chorus of almost soundless growls from all the Transgenics present who, like him, were unable to help hearing her unfair statements and the spite in her tone.

   This isn't right. This isn't the kind girl he knew as a child. It isn't the Max who tried so desperately to save him from his madness, from Manticore, less than a year ago. When did she become like this?

   Was it her months back in Manticore? No, it couldn't have been, she'd only been back in evaluation training for a short while. That training came after a short, strange, mild version of re-indoctrination that hardly compared to what their sister Brin, and Ben himself, went through.

   Was it the months after? Ben had been flitting in and out of Seattle for those same months, too afraid to approach but needing to see, hear, scent. He could admit that he didn't know everything that had happened even when he had been watching, but he couldn't see how any of the events since Manticore burned could have changed her so much.

   Was it because of the burning of Manticore? Did she feel guilty for not being in time to stop Eyes Only from broadcasting their location? Was it the weight of feeling responsible? The voices and screams of their lost brethren? Was it being around Cale and having feelings for the man who caused it?

   Ben's eyes flicker over the older human, his expression filled with dislike. It pisses Ben off to see the ways in which Cale looks at Max, at Max's friends, at Asha (that pretty, puppyish blonde girl who follows him around), at the Transgenics. The way he looks at Alec.

   **Alec**.

   Alec, Ben's twin. The twin that Lydecker stole from him, that Manticore kept from him. Alec, the little brother Ben failed to live up to, that he failed to protect, who's life he messed up, not once, but twice. Alex, the star of Manticore's elite who was both everything Ben could have, should have, been and so much that Ben could never be. Alexander, the soldier who had overcome the stigma of Ben's existence on two devastating occasions and was still CO three times over.

   Ben finally allows his eyes to rove over his twin with a ravenous need to take in every little detail. He needs to know that he's ok; uninjured and not hungry, strong and not hurt, healthy and not bleeding and safe and not bleeding and not full of rage and _not bleeding_ and relaxed and not sad and **not bleeding**.

   Eidetic memory flashes a series of photographs before his eyes of Alec injured in a myriad of ways and Ben comes back to himself to find that his pulse is racing, his breath stuttering and his hands trembling as he fails to bite back a whimper of distress.

   _Alec's head snaps up and his hand raises to halt Max's tirade._

   Ben shrinks back into the shadows as he feels his brother's gaze land on him. He ducks his head to hide his face beneath the shadow of baseball cap and hood, his shoulders hunch inwards as he turns and ducks behind a crowd of Crash's patrons, heading quickly for the door.

   As he hurries up the stairs he feels a flash of relief as he picks out Cece's voice over the sounds of the club and his own heart beat.

   “I'll go.”

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note:
> 
>    No, I haven't got Ben's designation wrong.  
> In this story Manticore changed it when they were reprogramming him. Two reasons – one, their shrinks advised it; two, police evidence shows that 331845739493 was tattooed on Ben's victims. Manticore has separated him ever so slightly by falsifying records for him as 331845739495 – X5-495 and creating a fictional 331845739493 – X4-493.
> 
> Author's Note 2:
> 
>    Story is set before 'Love Among the Runes' and after 'She Ain't Heavy' (and therefore after Jam Pony becomes part of the Transgenic underground). You get the impression that there's a decent amount of time between the two episodes as shown. Biggs and Cece are amongst the Transgenics working at Jam Pony.


	2. X5RE-494

  


   A slight smirk curls one edge of Alec's mouth as he leans against the wall beside the pool table, awaiting his chance to clear the table and obtain another donation to the MRF (Manticore Refugee Fund – heh). Max had spent the day on the warpath again, what a big fucking surprise. Alec had put himself in the way all day, cracking silly and sometimes inappropriate jokes to draw her ire onto himself rather than onto the other Transgenics at Jam Pony, or worse the Transhumans at Command. Well, he'd just about had it for the day, paid his dues, enough was enough. For God's sake he'd had to stop Max from punching out Sketchy. Sketchy! If anyone in their vicinity deserved her anger less, then Alec would like to meet that person. He could do with meeting someone nice and harmless.

   His eyes casually move around the room, touching on each of his people before pausing on the two newest, part-time, additions to the Jam Pony staff. Mindful of Alec's caution, Cece had introduced X6R-704 to Max by her name, Debbie, and her designation was carefully avoided. There was no way he was going to allow Max to crap on any of the younger Transgenics for being cloned from one of her precious, perfect unit sibs.

   X6R-522 had also joined today as a dispatcher, and was the reason that Alec had been so obsessive about drawing 452's anger his way. The fourteen year old was his sister, a fact that no-one was to mention to Max, under threat of Alec's fists. Alec watches her brush a hand over her brow, he can see her frowning in discomfort and his eyes narrow in displeasure. Clara is sensitive to atmosphere and emotions in the same ways as Alec himself, and while her ability doesn't seem to be as clear or strong as his, she doesn't have his practice at blocking and filtering. He doesn't need to lower his shields to work out where the atmosphere and emotions that are distressing her are coming from. Max. And probably Logan too.

   Catching Cece's eyes Alec flicks a glance towards Clara, silently asking the older female to check on her. After receiving a small nod in reply, he watches as Cece heeds his request, moving over to brush a hand against the younger girl's arm and ask her if she's ok or if she needs to leave? Clara shakes her head and smiles as she relaxes at the soothing nearness – Cece wasn't the least bit sensitive herself, not in that way, but her presence could soothe those who were. She was somewhat like a brick wall in that regard, keeping the world out and away, she'd done it for Alec a number of times when he'd needed it. Cece meets his eyes briefly and he smiles slightly in thanks. She gives him another small nod before she turns back to Clara.

   He turns to find Original Cindy looking at him with an eyebrow raised in question. She glances across the room at Cece and Clara before looking back at him. He can hear the silent 'Spill' in her expression but he just smiles blandly. “Hey OC, looking particularly fine tonight.” He runs his eyes down and back up her form appreciatively – she may bat for the other team but that was no reason not to let her know how good she looked.

   “Somethin' goin' on Pretty Boy?” she asks, one hand on her hip in one of those poses she shares with Max.

   “Nope.” Alec gives her a bright smile. “Not a thing.” As much as he likes her, Cindy made her position abundantly clear to him weeks back – Max was her only priority. Her help was only for her, not Alec, not even Joshua, only Max. He hides a wince as the memory of their voices floats through his mind.

_“Poor little white boy. He was excited about that story, too.” Cindy says as she watches Sketchy leave with his camera and now useless film._  
              _“Had to be done. Thanks.”  
_ _“I did it for Max. But you're welcome.”_

   Cindy purses her lips and shakes her head. It's clear that she knows that something is bothering him, but he hopes she's not going to push him to explain – he doesn't want to see the pity in her eyes when she realizes that she hurt him.

   “How are yo' newest strays settlin' in?” She asks tilting her head in Clara's direction. Jam Pony was steadily becoming Transgenic Central, each new addition brought in at Alec's direction.

   “Fine, as far as I know.”

   Unfortunately, the short exchange draws Max's attention and Alec's back tenses minutely as she stomps their way. Just as she opens her mouth to snap at him, his latest pool ~~victim~~ opponent misses his shot. “'Scuse me ladies.” He excuses himself with a pretty, false, grin and slaps his opponent on the arm before leaning over the pool table.

   He draws the game out as long as he can but eventually, and predictably, he wins. With charming humor he commiserates with the other guy before taking his money. “Anyone else fancy a game?” When no-one takes him up on the challenge, he sighs before laying his cue down and turning away.

   Max is scowling at him over OC's shoulder – of course she is. But as he's already thought to himself, he's had enough of that shit for today. Time to talk business.

   Or at least that's the idea. He barely has chance to mention that he has a plan as to how to get some rations that can be stored in Terminal City before she lays into him. Perhaps it was the fact that he dared to smile and speak in a positive manner. God knows, and frankly, he doesn't give a shit as to why.

   “God Alec, can't you ever take anything seriously? Grow up and stop being such a pain in my ass.”

   A muscle twitches in his jaw giving away his annoyance, but there's still a slight smile fixed on his face. Twisted amusement flashes in his eyes – one of these days he'd show her just how serious he could be and he'd land her so hard on her ass she'd think twice about even getting up off of it.

   She continues quieter, for Transgenic hearing, “Anyone would think you were created just to screw up my life with your schemes.” Then louder again, “No, shut up, I don't want to hear it.... I don't need to hear what or why, it'll be stupid and you'll botch it up anyway and I'll need to save your ass and fix your god-damn mess _again_.”

   For fuck's sake. He'd thought they were past this after the night Max had confided about his twin's madness and death, but evidently he'd been wrong. Tuning her tirade out he runs the night in question through his mind – yep, she'd definitely given him the clear impression that they were friends. Looks like his definition of friendship was vastly different to hers. Or maybe it was just friendship with him.

   The tension in his back ratchets up a notch as he picks up on the sub-vocal growls from his fellow Transgenics and he automatically turns slightly to check on his sister, taking in her pale face where she's pressed into Cece's side. He can't stop his own growl of protective anger. A growl that Max fails to take note of just as she had those of the others – could she truly not hear, not sense it? Or was she just that arrogant as to dismiss the threat? If she hadn't noticed the threat she definitely notices that his attention is no longer fully on her and her vitriol intensifies, voice raising once more. He just returns his gaze to her face and continues tuning her words out, though he's no longer smiling.

   A whimper and Alec's head snaps up, his hand raising to halt Max's tirade. He doesn't notice whether the bitch shuts up or not as he takes a step towards Clara. His eyes sweep the youngster's trembling form but he quickly realizes the sound of distress didn't come from her, though she is clearly upset and two others have joined Cece in trying to soothe her. He takes a couple more steps as his sharp eyes flicker around the club trying to find the source of the whimper, guided by the sound of a racing pulse and hitched breaths. He lowers his shields slightly and he's hit by a blinding wave of pain and guilt so strong that it momentarily shatters those shields and whites out his vision for a couple of seconds. Once his shields snap back into place and his vision clears his eyes zero in on the origin of the emotions.

   A male figure shrinks back into the shadows as Alec's gaze fixes on him. His head ducks down to hide his face beneath the shadow of baseball cap and hood, shoulders hunch inwards as whoever it is turns and ducks behind a crowd of Crash's patrons, heading quickly for the door.

   Alec's instincts find him heading for the door to intercept, to calm, to seek out and fix the source of distress. He barely gets half a dozen steps before Cece's crossed to his side, her voice quiet amidst the sounds of the club and the fleeing X's heart beat. “I'll go. You can take care of Clara?” He nods his agreement and watches her follow the other man up the stairs and out of the door before turning instead towards his sister.

   “What the hell is going on?” Coming up behind him, Max barely avoids shouting in her anger at being ignored. Alec turns to face her with a snarl on his lips.

   “Shut up 452.” He hisses, taking a threatening step towards her. “Close your mouth for once. Wake up and open your goddamn eyes.” At Biggs' hand on his shoulder he halts and takes a deep breath, leaning back into the touch for a moment before he turns his back on the irritating bitch, clearly dismissing her. He heads over to the bar, where Clara is bracketed by a pair of X5s.

   Resting his hands on her shoulders gently, he forces away his anger before he meets her eyes. They hold each other's gaze as he tries to project calm and safety to her. It works, a little, but not enough. Taking her hand in his left, he gestures quickly with his right.

   Alec leads the way towards the door, the other Transgenics – except Max – following, some of them surging ahead, all of them protectively surrounding him and his sister where she's tucked safely into his side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note:  
>    The concept of Alec as a clear empath is borrowed from [Vilnolin](http://archiveofourown.org/users/vilnolin/pseuds/vilnolin).
> 
> Author's Note 2:  
>    Some of the Transgenics must have hacked into the file systems over the years – curiosity and all that. They would have found out all sorts of interesting things, like which DNA templates and sources were related to each other.
> 
>    Clara and Alec are siblings because the people that Manticore stole their human DNA from were related. As far as the Transgenics are concerned all related Transgenics are siblings, no matter how the original templates were related to each other.
> 
> Author's Note 3:  
>    The R in a Transgenic's designation indicates that they are a member of R Detachment – that is, one of those re-indoctrinated as a result of the 09 escape.
> 
>    The E in a Transgenic's designation indicates that they are a member of the Elite Squadron, which is the Manticore version of Special Ops.


	3. X5-452

   Max's day had started off crappy and gone downhill from there. Someone in the apartment above had dropped something heavy, shocking Max out of a rare deep and long sleep – at 4am. The water in their shower had come out tinged brown and slimy feeling. They'd run out of coffee and Cindy ate the last of the oatmeal before Max could. Her tank top tore when she put it on, and when she ripped it back off, she broke a nail.

   Despite the early wake up call, she still ended up late into Terminal City. On the way there, some dick on a scooter cut her off, spraying her and her motorbike with dirt and gravel and when she checked her ninja she found that her baby was covered in scratches. Once she reached TC's command she found it in, what was clear to her eyes as, a state of chaos with Alec calmly standing in the middle of it all. The idiot was all smiley and... and... ugh, _perky_ , looking well groomed and as gorgeous as usual – the rat-bastard – sharing a joke with Mole and doing _nothing_ to sort out the mess that was no doubt his doing in the first place.

   When she tried to find out what was going on she was practically ignored. She heard someone in the room hiss traitor in her direction and she had no fucking clue who it was. By the time she'd given up trying to work it out Alec was gone.

   Demanding to know where, she got a terse reply from Mole that he'd gone to fetch the two new girls who were joining Jam Pony that day. The two of them then, somehow, got into a screaming row which only ended when Alec stuck his unwelcome nose into it. Her usual exchange of words with Alec ended with him making some asinine comment and then, before she could reply, informing her that he was leaving to escort the newbies into work bright and early to make a good impression on Normal – suck up. 

   After handing over her ninja to a pair of X6s who'd offered to detail her and sort out the scratches, Max had taken to the roof-tops of TC's crumbling buildings to try and run off her bad mood. It had worked, for all the good it did her day.

   Arriving at Jam Pony half an hour late for her shift she had to endure one of Normal's lectures on punctuality and how he should fire her. Each time she returned from her early runs - where she'd gotten soaked and hadn't got a single tip - she'd been repeatedly assailed by Alec at his moronic, smirking best, jokes and idiocy and all.

   Come lunch time she was storming towards her locker when she spotted one of the other messengers emptying his. As he walked past her she was surprised to see his face bruised, a cut on the bridge of his nose and one on his eyebrow, and his lip busted. When she asked Cindy what happened to him, the older woman just shrugged and said, “Alec's fists.”

   Max couldn't believe it! Just because he was Normal's Golden Boy he had no right to get people fired, and sure as hell not by picking fights when he knew their boss would let him get away scot-free. Selfish moron.

   To make matters worse, when she cussed and complained OC had actually looked at Max with confusion and surprise and a “Well, what dya expect?” As if Alec's actions were cool just because it meant that there was now a job for another Transgenic.

   The rest of her break was spent glaring at Alec where he was holding court across the room, laughing and smiling as if he hadn't just got some poor shmuck fired. She'd been so angry that one of Sketchy's usual bouts of stupidity almost ended in her punching him out. But, of course, Alec had suddenly been there between them, acting all calm and smoothing things over – asshole!

   She'd spent the afternoon stewing over his actions and how, for some inexplicable reason everyone seemed to be on his side, even Original Cindy. And what made that worse was that the evening before Cindy had spent a good quarter hour riding Max's ass about how she should come correct with Alec. That she should tell him that Logan believed the two of them were together and that Max was allowing him to go on believing it. About how Alec deserved to know and how he was her friend, how he always had her back - as if!

   And now here he was in Crash, the center of attention when all Max wants is some time away from the jerk to spend time with her friends; with Cindy and Sketchy and the others from Jam Pony; and with Logan. There Alec was, smirking and hustling some sucker at the pool table – ugh!

   Turning away from the sight of him, she tries to talk to Logan about how he's settling in at Sandeman's old house, only to be interrupted by Asha's arrival with some SW1 intel. Max's lips purse and she gives a sour look to the side of the blonde woman's oblivious head. With a huff of pique she looks around for Cindy. Panic flashes through her at the sight of her best friend talking to the thorn in her side – God, is she telling him?

            _“Somethin' goin' on Pretty Boy?” she hears Cindy ask.  
            “Nope.” Alec gives her a bright smile. “Not a thing.” _

   What the hell is he up to now? Her earlier panic transforms to her usual anger as Max jumps to the conclusion that Cindy has caught him out in some idiocy and she stomps their way. 

   Just as she opens her mouth to snap at him, his latest pool opponent misses his shot. “'Scuse me ladies.” He excuses himself with a stupid grin and slaps his opponent on the arm before leaning over the pool table. 

   She can tell that he's drawing the game out as long as he can – no doubt to avoid her finding out what he's up to - but eventually, and predictably, he wins. She grimaces at his 'charming' behavior as he commiserates with the other guy before taking his money and trying to lure in another idiot. She scowls at him over OC's shoulder as he leaves the table.

   Coming over to them he starts with some rubbish about a plan to get some rations that can be stored in Terminal City. TC needs more of everything, especially food, and it's no joking matter so what the hell is he smiling and looking so happy about? 

 

   “God Alec, can't you ever take anything seriously? Grow up and stop being such a pain in my ass.” She continues quieter, for Transgenic hearing, “Anyone would think you were created just to screw up my life with your schemes.” He opens his fool mouth to speak and she interrupts him, speaking louder again, “No, shut up, I don't want to hear it.... I don't need to hear what or why, it'll be stupid and you'll botch it up anyway and I'll need to save your ass and fix your goddamn mess _again_.”

 

   Something makes her tense, her hackles rising slightly but the fact that Alec doesn't have the decency to apologize or try to explain himself distracts her. In fact, he turns away from her to look over at the bar and actually growls. Growls! He'd better not be growling at her, but then, she could do with another opportunity to put the smackdown on his ass. She raises her voice and continues, and the moron just blandly returns his gaze to her face, clearly tuning her words out. 

   Before she can address that insult, Alec's head snaps up as his hand raises to tell her to shut up. The fucking nerve. He actually starts to walk away from her. Max sees Cece come up to him and say something, to which he nods and watches her leave. And then, instead of turning back to Max, he starts towards the bar.

   “What the hell is going on?” Coming up behind him, Max barely avoids shouting in her anger at being ignored. 

   Max's heart stutters as Alec turns to face her with a snarl on his lips, hissing “Shut up 452.” 

   He then takes a threatening step towards her and Max unconsciously shrinks back, taking an involuntary step back for each of his. “Close your mouth for once. Wake up and open your goddamn eyes.” Mute with shock, she sees Biggs place a calming hand on his shoulder, easily halting Alec's advance. She watches Alec take a deep breath, leaning back into the other man's touch for a moment before he turns his back on the her, clearly dismissing her. Max's hands clench as her short bout of fear flashes back into anger.

   She takes a few steps towards the bar where Alec is standing in front of the young X6 girl, bracketed by a pair of other X5s. “Boo, don't.” Cindy calls in a quiet voice before placing a restraining hand on her arm. 

   Max watches in confusion as Alec rests his hands gently on the young girl's shoulders for a minute before he takes her hand in his and gestures quickly with his other hand. The gestures are almost too quick for Max to register and worse, she can't translate them fast or accurately enough. But it's clear he called the other Transgenics to him, giving them some kind of orders.

   She watches in bewildered and impotent anger as Alec leads the way towards the door, her fellow Transgenics following, some of them surging ahead, all of them protectively surrounding him and the X6 tucked into his side.

   “What...?” Max asks faintly, her confusion clear. She turns to Cindy and then looks over at Logan. They both seem to have noticed something she hasn't and are looking at her with looks of dismay and disappointment. Even Sketchy and Asha are looking at her coolly. “What...?” She repeats.

   “Come on boo.” Cindy shakes her head slightly. “I think you and I need to go home and have a talk.” Max scowls slightly, shaking her head in reply. “Yes, we do.” OC tells her firmly, handing her jacket over and nudging her towards the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note:
> 
>    This chapter may have come across as character bashing. I'm sorry if you think so, but it's not. Max has had a really bad day and is in a awful mood and like many of us she's taken it out on someone else. And she is often a bitch to Alec in the show. I promise she won't remain so horrible in the rest of the fic, a little oblivious and self-centered, but not horrible.


	4. X5-278 & X6R-704

   “God Alec, can't you ever take anything seriously?”

   Cece forces herself to ignore 452s words and concentrate on Clara. She knows that if she doesn't, she's likely to go over there and smash the bitch's face in. Seriously.

   She curls her arm around Clara's waist and pulls the younger girl close into her side, carefully placing herself between her and the exchange. The girl starts to tremble, pressing closer as she's forced to hear the spiteful words aimed at her brother. Cece murmurs soothingly, stroking her arm and trying to keep her calm, blocking out everything else but the X6's response.

   Monitoring Clara's heart beat and respiration, Cece takes a deep breath adding to the data she's receiving about the girl's state by taking in the emotions pouring off of her body in her scent.  
   Wait a minute. 

   Cece can smell Clara's scent next to her and the overlapping scent of Alec further away behind her, but...? The shared parts of their scent are strangely amplified. Frowning, she takes another deep breath. Not amplified - multiplied. She looks around discreetly, there must be someone else here related to them. 

   There, she spots a male figure in the far corner of the club. Focusing her vision she makes out enough to realize he's another 49 like Alec. When she sees him cringing in reaction to 452s tirade it's enough to clue her in to which 49 it is. X5-493, or rather 495 as he is now. Ben, Alec's genetic double and Renfro's last pet project.

   Clara turns further into Cece's body, her hand twisting in the fabric of the older Transgenic's sweater. Two other X5 females come close to them, brushing gentle hands against the girl's back. With their nearness as an extra comfort and barrier, Clara relaxes, just a little, enough to release her grip on Cece. The combination of back up and the slight drop in Clara's heart beat and breathing is enough to allow Cece to direct more attention across the room towards Ben.

   Crap. His pulse is starting to race, he's breathing too fast and she can see his hands shaking. It can't just be from what he's witnessing across the club. Flashback maybe? His breath hitches and Cece is just trying to come up with a way to get him to snap out of it and calm the fuck down, without abandoning her orders to protect his sister, when it happens.

   Ben's distress becomes vocal, and the sound of his whimper is like a klaxon to Alec's instincts. Even with her back to him she can feel him tense up and start to move across the room. Clara too is reacting. She's distracted from her own discomfort, looking for the other whose upset she can sense. It's like she can suddenly push aside the overpowering and stinging vitriol that has been battering her from 452's direction to concentrate on this new projection of pained emotion, one that she can help with. Transgenic instincts – they're friggin' unbeatable. 

   Detaching herself from Clara, Cece leaves her to the other girls before turning and crossing the room to Alec's side. She can see his brother darting for the stairs and, speaking quietly, she suggests to Alec that she go after him. She waits for his agreement before she quickly follows Ben up the stairs and out of the door.

   As she leaves she can hear 452's obnoxious demand of, “What the hell is going on?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Once outside Cece takes a moment to breath deeply, clearing her lungs and her head of the club. After that moment she's quickly on the move, heading away from the entrance to Crash and starting the search for her fellow X5. It's not much of a search though, she'd thought she would have to track him.

   Instead, she can see him at the end of the street, standing next to a motorbike and obviously waiting for her. Moving swiftly towards him she stops warily a short distance away – She doesn't yet know how good a job the med and Psy Ops teams did on him, he may have fallen apart again after Manticore fell. 

   “278. Cece.” He says her designation and name quietly, raising his head to look at her. It's always a shock when she first hears him speak or sees his face. She doesn't know if it's because he sounds and looks so much like Alec or that he's somehow not completely identical. She's heard a rumour that the two of them are one of the natural twins sets, rather than clones or siblings. If true, it would certainly explain why they're not 100% identical like the cloned twins tend to be, yet the differences in their appearances are so slight. Alec is, perhaps, half an inch taller than Ben, his hazel eyes a touch greener, hair a shade or so lighter, and he seems to be built a little slimmer, leaner – all differences that can't really be explained by the differences in their lives so far. In contrast the differences in their personalities are more marked.

   “49...5” She catches herself before she calls him by his original designation, she knows how important the change in that last digit is – or at least, how important Manticore's psychologists said it is. “What are you doing here Ben?” 

   “I... I just...” Ben shrugs, not sure how to answer that.

   “Which one of them are you spying on? Hiding from?”

   He shakes his head, “I'm not spying on anyone.”

   “Would you have rather I said stalking?” Cece asks sardonically. “And you are hiding.” The younger Transgenic grimaces in response and shrugs again. “Well? Which one is it?”

   “I guess I'm hiding from both of them?” He answers quietly.

   “Are you asking me or telling me? Nevermind.” She shakes her head, “Which one are you watching? Max?” She only gets a slight response to 452's name so she tries again, “Alec?” The response that time is more significant. Ben simultaneously meets her eyes and shrinks into himself. “Why?” She asks.

   “I...I...had to, have to... Renfro said I've got to... and I needed to...” His stuttering isn't exactly an explanation but Cece can work out enough from what she learned back at base and the neediness in his voice, but she prompts him for an explanation all the same. 

   “You needed?”

   “I needed to see him, see he was ok.” He manages to get a coherent reply out, before taking a shuddering breath and looking back towards the entrance of Crash. “I'm supposed to... protect him.” She follows his glance just as the door flies open and a couple of their peers exit the club, clearly taking point.

   “Crap.” Turning back to him she gestures at his bike. “Come on, we'd better blaze. Unless you want to face Alec right now?” She knows that Alec will be battling his instincts as brother and alpha, not to mention his anger at The Bitch. Coming face to face with Ben in that state of mind? 

   “Hell no,” is the fervent answer as Ben jumps onto the cycle, starting it and barely waiting for her to get on behind him before he takes off.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   As one of the older X6s, X6R-704 – known as Debbie – isn't particularly used to being protected, but she finds herself sandwiched between two X5 females as they sweep her towards the stairs of Crash in the wake of the Commander and his younger sister. As they all pause on the stairs waiting for those on point to give the all clear, she takes the time to glance back into the club.

   She can see X5-452 pouting like a sulky child as they leave her behind, looking to her Ordinary friends for some explanation as to why she isn't getting her way. It's sad and wrong, it should be them looking to her for explanations, but she's so far away from what she should be as a Transgenic that she seemingly has no idea. 

   The man, Cale, knows a worrying amount of intel on them. She would prefer it if it was the black woman, Original Cindy, that held the information. Like most Transgenics, Debbie is wary of humans, in her experience they are untrustworthy and undeserving of respect. But Original Cindy is different; it's obvious why 494 likes her. It's obvious too why X5-452 holds her in such high regard, though it's harder to understand why the older woman feels the same in return.

   Her musing is interrupted as she's nudged towards the door and out into the night air. In short order she finds herself pushed into position flanking X6R-522, opposite X5E-511, as they make their way swiftly towards the grouping of vehicles a little way from the entrance to the club. 

   “Biggs you're with me.” Alec turns slightly towards the other man. “Debbie will ride with you. We'll take them back to their apartment.” Biggs nods and climbs onto his motorbike, gesturing to Debbie to climb on behind him. “The rest of you will escort us, before you head off to your duties or R&R.” With that he climbs onto his own bike without letting go of Clara, who immediately plasters herself to his back, face pressed into his spine. Naturally his orders are obeyed as a couple of Transgenics melt into the night, heading to the rooftops to pace them on foot. The others climb onto bikes to ride escort and they're quickly on their way.

   Debbie rests her head on the back of Biggs' shoulder as she leans into a turn, following his movements smoothly. She can feel his stomach and waist muscles shifting against her hands and forearms, and his thighs against her knees. The younger girl can't help thinking that if she were pressed closer she would feel the shifting of his buttocks against her inner thighs.

   Her breath hitches as she catches her lip between her teeth, a flash of lust tightening her stomach. She'd only finished her heat cycle a few days earlier and the hormones were still biting her at inopportune moments. It had been her second cycle since Manticore went down, the first came just two weeks afterwards and had been a rude awakening. Without the drugs that they were used to getting to help control heat, she'd become almost mindless when it peaked – she'd left the poor boy she'd screwed a wrung out mess. She'd been utterly humiliated and scarily pleased with herself at the same time. It had been frightening how much she'd enjoyed seeing the 3 X6 males she'd been traveling with fight it out to be with her, and how she'd teased and egged them on. It was a good job that one of the other girls had been a medic to patch them all up.

   Thankfully this time she'd been able to check herself in with their Med team and they'd placed her into isolation. The isolation rooms were one of the first things that the X series had set up once they'd started congregating in Terminal City. No-one wanted to see the fights, or worse, that would ensue with so many of them in close proximity without the suppressants. And so Debbie had spent 96 hours locked in a carefully ventilated cell, by turns bored out of her mind and clawing at the walls. But at least she wouldn't be spending the next few weeks fretting about being pregnant.

   Their journey to the building where Debbie and Clara are staying with a handful of other X6 females – and coincidentally only a few buildings down and across the street from Alec's apartment – is soon over and she half-regretfully dismounts from the back of Biggs' motorcycle. He really is far too appealing to her hormones right now, damned attractive alpha male that he is, and she returns his smile weakly. 

   “Come on.” He gestures for her to follow him into the building, the two of them ahead of Clara and a protective Alec. She glances back at the other man, taking in his still slightly clenched jaw and stalking movements. It made him look incredibly dangerous, and even more incredibly sexy.

   Dammit. 'Not the time Debbie' She tells herself, 'Not the fucking time.'


	5. Original Cindy & Max

   Placing her purse on the counter, Cindy slips out of her jacket before turning to look at her roommate. “I think we should make ourselves comfortable. It's time we had a ourselves a good long heart to heart. Aiight?” She doesn't give Max time to reply, just nudges the younger woman towards her room before slipping through the bead curtain into her own space to change into her favorite pair of pajamas.

   By the time the older woman returns Max is already slumped on the couch, arms crossed and a pout on her lips. She looks like a little kid about to get unfairly scolded. Grabbing two beers from the fridge, Cindy hands one over and takes a seat on the other end of the sofa. She makes herself comfortable before fixing her dark eyes on her best boo. The look in them is soft and speaks of friendship but is at the same time stern. It makes Max start to fidget, until she finally snaps. 

   “What?”

   “There's been a bug up yo' ass all day and Cindy wants to know what put it there. And how that led to ya speaking like ya did to your boy.”

   “He's not my boy.” Max gives her usual reply ignoring the rest of Cindy's statement.

   “Well, you may wanna tell Logan that. Though after tonight he'll probably work that out for himself.” At the younger woman's look of surprise Cindy explains, “When two people are together, they don't go talkin' to each other like you did. Not unless there's something very wrong with their relationship.”

   “There is.” Max growls. “It's Alec. Of course there's something wrong. He's a slut and an unreliable screw up.”

   “We both know that ain't true. He's yo' friend.” 

   “Friend, ha.” Scoffs Max, her face screwing up as if she's tasted something sour. “All he's ever done is mess up my life and let me down.”

   “Really?”

   “Yeah.”

   “So it wasn't Alec who helped you find brother Zack then? Or helped you rescue that mermaid girl? It wasn't Alec who went with you to find that freaky Manticore lizard-dog?” Cindy asks pointedly. “He hasn't been crawling around in sewers and shady buildings on Eyes Only missions with you, or sometimes instead of you?” She pauses waiting to see if Max will say anything but the other girl stays stubbornly, and angrily, silent. 

   “Alec hasn't been going out at all hours of the day and night to get supplies for Terminal City and dragging himself into Jam Pony each day, sometimes looking ready to fall asleep on his bike? He hasn't been risking himself and his pretty hide rescuing Transgenics from the cops and NSA?” With each question Max gets more and more tense, grinding her teeth. 

   Cindy can feel her own anger rising, “He hasn't been shot and stabbed and strangled and electrocuted and beaten watching yo' back? No? Well, I guess it wasn't him a couple a' weeks back, bleeding out all over our bathroom, after he held off a squad of cops while you got that group of Transhumans away to safety. My mistake.”

   “Okay, enough, fine. I get your goddamn point.” Max shouts, shooting up from the couch to storm across the room. “Alec's a goddamn saint. I get it.” She snarls, hurt and pissed off at her best friend for lauding Alec. The reminder of Alec's ashen face as he sat in their bath bleeding from 3 bullet wounds, skin sweaty and breathing labored, completely silent as Max desperately tried to stabilize him until a couple of their medics arrived, sends her pulse racing in remembered fear which just manages to piss her off even more.

   “Now Boo, don't you go getting like that with OC, she ain't Alec and won't put up with it.” Cindy stands up to face her, hands coming to rest on her hips.

   “I don't know what you mean.”

   “I mean that every time things go wrong, or every time you's in a pissy mood yo' take it out on him.” Cindy tells her, “And he just lets you. Lets you lay it all on his shoulders and does his best to cheer you up.” Max snorts in angry disbelief. “You do. He does. And everyone knows it. Even Normal knows it.”

   “Well, he deserves it. It's usually his fault.”

   “It is _not_.” Cindy argues. “Maybe he made a few little mistakes and tom-catted around a bit, when he first got out of Manticore, but yo' know he didn't know any better.” She cuts her friend off before she can interrupt, “And he's changed, grown up, you know he has. You admitted it yourself when you told me that you let Logan think the two of yo' is together.”

   “I thought he had. But he hasn't changed.” Max insists. “He hasn't grown up at all. He's like a little kid who thinks he should always get what he wants.” Her eyes flash angrily as she remembers one of the things he'd done to piss her off that day, “Good people don't go around picking fights with someone to get them fired.”

   Cindy looks at Max in confusion. “Who told you Alec picked a fight?”

   “You did. You told me he beat Callum up to get him fired.”

   Confusion turns to annoyance, “Yo' boy didn't set out to get Callum fired. Why would you think that?”

   “Well what the hell was he playing at picking a fight in the middle of work, huh?” Max crosses her arms irately. After a few moments of angry staring, Cindy takes a calming breath.

   “Let OC lay out what went down.” Sitting back down she takes a sip from her beer. “Callum and Skye were talking bullshit as usual. Now OC didn't hear all of what they said, but it was clearly disrespectful of our Jam Pony sistas.” She pauses, places her bottle down on the table with studied casualness, and gives Max a significant look. “Now, yo' know that Normal has a clear policy about that kind of talk, yeah?” Max nods slowly. “So, can you guess where Bossman was when their talk turned to our new sista', Debbie?”

   “I don't know.” Max shrugs, suddenly quiet, she's starting to get an idea of where this is going.

   “They were standing on one side of the support column. Normal was standing on the other side... with Alec.”

   “Not good.”

   “No, not good. Normal's face was starting to go red, really startin' to get angry, yeah? And Alec, well he had that blank mask thing that y'all have goin' on.” 

   Cringing, Max looks down at her feet. The Manticore Mask. She knows it well and she's only seen it a couple of times on Alec's usually animated face. She knows that it means that things are about to go FUBAR.

   Cindy gives her room-mate a few moments to digest before she continues. “Now, Skye, he was clearly not cool with what Callum was saying. He said how she was a little too young; barely legal and that. But Callum, well, he just decided to go completely over that line. He started on Clara.”

   “You're kidding.” Max looks back up, shocked completely out of her anger, “She's just a kid.”

   “Wish I was, Boo.” The older woman shakes her head in her own disbelief at what she had heard, “He said that Clara was, and I quote, 'A sweet, ripe, young cherry that needs ta be bitten'. And that he would love to be the man who gets to 'make her a woman'.”

   “God!” Max turns around to glare out the window in disgust.

   “I thought that Normal's head was going to explode. But Alec froze, like he couldn't believe it. Then his mask shattered and OC's sure her heart stopped for a moment there.” Cindy shivers at the memory. “Thought that boy was gonna put him in the ER. If Biggs and Cece hadn't a' been there, he would have. And let me tell you, there ain't a one a' us at Jam Pony that woulda held it against him.” She pauses, then watches as Max's head snaps round at next her words, “Save maybe you.”

   “What do you mean?” Max asks, “You think I'd...”

   “I think there are times you'd hold anything against Alec, just to give yo'self something to blame him for.” The black woman states firmly, the tone of her voice tired. Max drops her eyes feeling uncomfortably like she's let Cindy down. She clears her throat quietly before asking,

   “What happened next?”

   “After they pulled Alec away, Callum laying there on the floor where he was dropped, Normal just stood over him. He didn't so much as glance at Alec, just ignored what he'd done.” Cindy tells her, “He straight up told Callum exactly what he thought of him, why he was being fired, and that he was gonna make sure any future employer would know exactly the kind of sicko he is.” She looks satisfied at the memory of Normal's words. “Then he turns and just suggests to Alec that he take a break and get some air. How he was looking a little pale.”

   Max closes her eyes and bites her lip. She'd really misjudged the situation today with Alec and Callum. What makes it worse is that Cindy's right, there was no reason for her to have assumed that Alec was at fault – he's never done anything like that at work before and she doesn't know Callum at all. Ugh, she feels sick at what Callum had said about Debbie and Clara. And she knows she would have done the exact same thing that Alec had done if she'd have been there instead. 

   Cindy watches her make her way back to the sofa to sit back down and cover her face with her hands. “We haven't finished.” She says quietly. “Yo' gonna explain to OC why you spoke to him that way tonight. It was cruel and spiteful and completely out a line.” Max looks at her in dismay and guilt.

   “I don't know why.” She whispers.

   “You sure?” Cindy queries. Getting a nod, she says, “Well then, lets start at the beginning. Ya never told me how the two of you met. Cindy knows it was at Manticore, but why don't you tell me what happened?” She's surprised when her question causes Max to blush. 

   “It was in my cell. He... he was...” Stuttering to a stop the younger woman clears her throat and decides to explain a little background first. “You know when Zack and I went on our mission, when I got shot? Well, our target was the DNA lab where they kept the DNA samples aswell as the prepared zygotes and embryos.” She huffs and looks a little guilty, “It was Lydecker's idea. He said it would take them a good while to replace and none of us had any idea of what Manticore would do in the meantime.”

   “And what did they do?” Cindy prompts, a little warily.

   “They...uh, they created the Breeding Program.” Max smiles weakly at OC's cough and look of shock. “They studied all the X5 DNA summaries and decided who would be advantageous matches, who would create desirable offspring.”

   “That's both clever and incredibly... eww.” 

   “I know.”

   “And you and Alec...” 

   “Yeah,” Max replies with a grimace. “About two weeks before they let me escape he came waltzing into my cell and 2 minutes after introducing himself he whips off his shirt and tells me to take off my clothes.” She snorts, “He said we had orders to 'copulate every night'...” She's interrupted when Cindy starts to giggle. Looking at her best friend in disbelief, her mouth slightly opens in surprised dismay.

   “Sorry, sorry.” Cindy apologizes, snorting a little. “I just can't imagine Alec saying 'copulate'.”

   “Well he did.” Max replies a little pissy. “And then after I kicked him into the door he insulted me. Said how I'd spent ten years 'in filth and degradation' and that he 'might catch something'!”

   “So, you didn't want to bump uglies with him, but you're pissed that he didn't particularly want to have sex with you?” 

   “No!”

   “Ya sure?” Cindy asks, her eyebrow raised. “You didn't feel any feminine offense?”

   “Perfectly.” Max responds stiffly. “I'm simple pissed that what he said was uncalled for.”

   The older woman looks at her room-mate in incredulity at the sheer hypocrisy in Max's words. A fair amount of what Max has said to Alec the last six months has been uncalled for, not least what she said to him tonight at Crash. She shakes her head and returns to the subject at hand. “Uncalled for? What, like kicking him into the door?” 

   Max looks at Cindy in surprise at the censure in her tone. “I was making my feelings clear, I had no intention of 'copulating' with him'.”

   “And you couldn't have just said no?”

   “...”

   “What, you think he would have... forced you?”

   “No.” Max is genuinely shocked at the idea and Cindy is relieved that Max hasn't made herself think _that_ badly of him. “I know he wouldn't have. Even though...”

   “What?”

   “The males were...” Max pauses uncomfortably, her voice dropping to a whisper, “They were given orders to use force if their partners were unwilling. And a few did.”

   “Oh my god.” Cindy murmurs, horrified.

   “Only a few.” Max rushes to reassure her friend. “Most, ...most of the X5s with partners who said no, or where the male couldn't, they covered for them, lied and claimed successful couplings.” Her mouth twists with distaste, “But some, well, some reported their partner to the guards.”

   “And what happened to those who were reported?”

   “Tests and Punishment.” Max answers succinctly.

   “So Alec...”

   “Lied, to Renfro herself. At the time I was furious, he'd boasted that we did it twice. But now,” Max shakes her head in remembrance, “He was taking a huge risk, for someone he didn't know or trust. For an '09er'.”

   “O'niner?”

   “One of the 2009 escapees. It's what the others call us. The twelve escapees. Me, Zack, Krit and Syl,... Ben...”

   The strangled tone of her voice on the last name makes Cindy interrupt her to question, “Ben?”

   “He...he was my brother, the one I was closest to, even closer than with Zack.” Max explains. Cindy raises an eyebrow, surprised that Max had had the strongest bond with someone other than Zack. “You know how I told you about my clone, Sam? I found out recently that most of us escapees had cloned twins.” Max pauses and bites her lip, “Ben's clone is, well, he's Alec. I guess that's one of the reasons I act like a bitch with him.”

   “Ya don't just act like a bitch, yo' _is_ a bitch to him.” Cindy tells her plainly. “If Ben was like your brother, doesn't that mean Alec is too?”

   “No!” Max looks offended by the very idea. “Why would I want to claim Alec as family?” Her face twists in disgust.

   “Do we really need to go into the reasons again?” Cindy demands, annoyed.

   “No.” Max pouts a little, chastised. “But I just can't think of Ben's _clone_ as my brother.” She gives a tone of revulsion to the word clone that she maybe doesn't really mean. 

   Confused Cindy asks, “But, if you weren't bothered about finding out about yo' clone, why should it bother you that Brother Ben had a clone?” 

   Clearly reluctant to reply, Max says, quietly, “Ben's dead. Last year. He... he was... he'd gone mad. And Lydecker was coming, and he asked me.” She looks at her friend, her eyes dark with desperate appeal, her hand reaching up to touch the back of her own neck, the other out in a strange clawed position, “Ben begged me to, and I did.” 

   The older woman's mouth drops as she watches Max's hand do a strange, but clear, twisting motion. 

   Damn.


	6. Sketchy, Asha & Logan

   Nights at Crash had often been a source of shock, surprise, bewilderment and bemusement to Sketchy. That was usually due to him seeing the word through a haze of marijuana. Not to mention, imbibing a large quantity of beer, but tonight...

   Tonight Sketchy had cut back on the booze and avoided the drugs after today's close call with an angry Max's fists, too afraid to risk pissing her off again through the drunken stupidity or ignorance that even he has to admit he's prone to. And yet, he was now more shocked and surprised than he had been in a long time. The night's events had left him in a greater state of bewilderment and bemusement than when... Well, he didn't know when.

   Sure, he'd known that Max had been in a awful mood all day, and sure he knew that she tended to take her bitchiness out on Alec – though why the other man let her get away with so much, Sketchy had no idea. Sometimes he would even wind her up more, taking some weird enjoyment out of it. He hadn't been at all amused today though.

   Others might not have noticed anything different in Alec's behaviour and the way he was responding to Max, but Sketchy had. People might label the lanky man as oblivious or stupid, and sometimes he was, but other times he most certainly was not. There was a reason that he thought he could make a good reporter; reporters are good at observation. He liked to think that his observations of Alec, and Alec around Max, had taught him a lot about both of them. 

   For instance, Max's bitchiness towards Alec wasn't because of his jokey demeanour or his success with the fairer sex, or wanting him for herself like some people believed. No, there was some deeper reason, something important and painful, something that stood between them like a barrier yet pulled them together at the same time. 

   Also, Alec is very far from 'Always all right' no matter how much he says it, and how brightly he smiles when he does. Alec wears a mask – no, not a mask, layers of masks. Some of them are strong and thick, others brittle, but he wields them like both a shield and a weapon. He may let people see through some of them, he may have let Sketchy see through some of them, but only those he really, truly trusts are allowed past them; and Alec's trust, he thinks, is very hard to earn. Sketchy would like to earn that trust; Alec's a good man and a good friend. 

   Which is why Sketchy couldn't get his head 'round the way Max had been treating Alec all day, and how she'd spoken to him tonight. 

   Max had been full of snide comments towards Alec before their lunch break, often punching him on the arm or shoulder. But after lunch, god, her spite had risen to new levels and Sketchy had even seen her kick at him more than once. 

   When Sketchy had ventured to say something to her she'd actually gone for him. If Alec hadn't have come from nowhere to deflect the blow and her anger... Sketchy shuddered. He's been acquainted with Max's fists before and those times she hadn't been anywhere near as angry.

   And tonight...

   The things that Max had said to Alec – there was just no good reason that Sketchy could see for such nastiness, he'd even venture to say such cruelty. It wasn't fair. And the way she'd reacted to him looking after that new kid Clara, it had shocked him. Though not as much as it had shocked him to see Alec, not so much finally stand up to her, as to do so in a way that clearly expressed his anger and that was a little threatening. But... Max had deserved it.

   They've worked together for years now, Max and Sketchy, been friends for nearly as long, but he was starting to wonder if he really wanted to remain friends with her. That she could act like this, it just wasn't right.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   It's no secret that before tonight Asha had never really liked Max much. It's also no secret that she likes Alec and that the two of them get on well together, which is strange considering how they first met. He should have killed her and Logan back then, but didn't.

   After tonight, well, Asha is now of the opinion that Max is a grade A bitch with a superiority complex that needs its own zip code. She's also of the opinion that Alec has the patience of a saint; how he kept from loosing his temper earlier than he did is a testament to his self-control.

   Why Max keeps harping on at Alec about a couple of mistakes he made when he was first out of that Manticore place she has no idea. Weren't they all segregated from the real world or something? Then how can anyone have expected them to adapt within days, or even a few weeks, to being free?

   As far as she can see, Alec adapted pretty quickly. And if he owed Max anything for what happened when he first got out then he's definitely made up for it since.

   Asha had seen them both during that thing with the mermaid and her boyfriend, mate, whatever. It was Alec who'd called Max in to help rescue her. He hadn't had to; Asha's sure he could have managed on his own. Instead he'd let Max take control of the 'mission', and he'd gotten shot during the rescue. 

   So what if he'd found the girl when he was visiting a strip club – why shouldn't he visit strip clubs? Its not like he's some horrible sleaze-ball looking to make the girls feel even worse about themselves. And he wasn't alone, Sketchy and their boss were there too; Max hadn't laid into them about it. 

   So Max had had to pretend to be looking for work as a stripper to get in, so what? She's done more demeaning things for Eyes Only missions, and she doesn't complain half as much over those things.

   Then there was the thing where Asha's SW1 cell had been compromised. Alec had helped with that débâcle without being asked, and she knows that she's the only one who thanked him. 

   Since the Transgenics have been outed publicly, the Alec that Asha has seen has been diligent, focused and extremely competent, all while remaining friendly and good humoured. It's obvious the other Transgenics respect and like him, unlike Max. 

   While Asha hasn't exactly spent huge amounts of time with the Transgenics, she's overheard hints here and there when she's helped out and picked up on things enough that she's been able to come to some pretty clear conclusions. It's blatantly clear that Max has decided that she's in charge somehow - because she 'freed them from Manticore'. But, anyone with half a brain can see that it's Alec's lead that the X series all follow. 

   God, Asha would love to be there to see her face when Max finds out that where Alec's one of the leaders in Terminal City, she most certainly is not.

   Maybe that's a bit petty, and Logan would be disappointed in her, but hell, the way Max acts towards her, Asha deserves to get a little bit of payback.

   Asha has spent all day grubbing around Seattle trying to get intel on one of SW1's and Eyes Only's mutual targets much faster than she usually would, taking more risks than usual to do so. Why? Because Logan asked her to. Of course, he also asked her to bring it to him as soon as possible tonight because it was so urgent. So urgent that when she got to that tumbledown house he was staying at, all she found was a note telling her that he was at Crash and could she bring the info there?

   So she makes her way all the way here, only for Little Miss Perfect to get pissy at Asha for interrupting her and Logan's oh-so-important awkward small talk with the much less important intel that he urgently asked for.

   So sue her for enjoying it when Alec finally snapped. The way Alec managed to frighten Max with a couple of harsh sentences and threatening steps was immensely satisfying. It's just a shame that it didn't stick.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Dropping his keys to Sandeman's old house on the small table inside the door, Logan makes his way slowly through to his work area, placing the folder of intel from Asha on the table before taking a seat in the salvaged office chair and staring thoughtfully at the dark screen of his computer.

   The night had certainly been interesting. The events called a few things into question. The least important things, and the most important to him, are in regards to Max and Alec's relationship.

   He knows he should be thinking about the intel that Asha brought him, or maybe how the things he's heard and seen tonight affect the Transgenics, and therefore Max. But, he's only human, he can't stop wondering about the state of things between Max and Alec.

   When Logan had arrived at Crash tonight to meet Asha, he'd been thrilled to see the way Max was glaring at her fellow Transgenic – she'd looked ready to claw him to pieces. He'd hoped it meant that Alec had screwed up badly and that things were, or were about to be, over between them. That now they'd worked through the sexual tension between them, and the curiosity, Max had realised that they had nothing else to build a relationship on. That maybe she had realised that she'd only fixed on Alec because she knew and trusted him.

   Logan can practically hear Max's denial in his head and he has to smile a little. Whatever she says, he knows she trusts Alec. She has as long as she's known him, which is strange considering how they met and what the outcome of that was. But then, Logan can say very much the same – Alec had been sent to deliver the news of the retrovirus in Max's body, intended to either kill Logan or trap the two of them under Manticore's thumb.

   Despite that, there are three things that stand out in his mind about Alec that day. First, the gentle way Alec had helped him into his wheelchair when Logan was infected. Second, his reactions when Max started the Eyes Only hack broadcasting Manticore's location. Though he was seeing it through a haze of pain and sickness, he can remember the look of shock on the younger man's face. 

   At the time Logan had felt smug pride at Max's actions, but it had been quickly quashed when he saw the disbelief change to sheer horror as Manticore was unmasked. That was the first indication that Logan had had that he may have made a mistake. He can remember how that small knot of doubt grew when Alec's eyes moved to Max's oblivious back and the way that he had looked at her. He didn't know it at the time, but looking back Logan thinks that Alec knew exactly what was going to happen, that Max's comment that his home wasn't going to be there anymore was accurate in the worst possible way. 

   But how could either Logan or Max have known that in revealing the location of Manticore's base they would doom all the Transgenics? That if Max hadn't have had to go back for the antigen right away, she wouldn't have been there to override the lock down? How could they have known that Manticore would try to burn all the Transgenics alive?

   Alec had quickly schooled his face as he saw Max turn away from the screen, and he'd been almost docile as she tied him up and left. And then came the third thing Logan remembers about Alec from that day, the last thing he remembers before the virus clouded his mind. As soon as Max left, Alec had dropped his mask and let his grief crash over him, closing his eyes in pain. He knew that so many of his people were about to die and there was nothing he could do about it. Logan can't imagine what it would be like to feel that hopeless.

   Not once in the months since has Alec said a word to either Logan or Max about the price of their ignorance, he hadn't held it against them. Instead he's helped them with EO missions and missions to rescue Transgenics and Transhumans from the clutches of White and his NSA stooges. And he'd done it with smiles and jokes, and complete competence. And Logan had trusted him all along. 

   Trusted that he wouldn't reveal Logan as Eyes Only, that he wouldn't betray Asha to the police as being SW1, that he would help the Transgenics, that he would go on EO missions and that he would have Max's back. He'd believed and trusted in him as a friend. Right up until the morning he'd seen him leave Max's apartment and realised that the younger man had stolen her from him.


	7. Alec, Biggs, Clara & Debbie

   By the time he'd left Crash, Alec's instincts and temper were both raging – you'd think that his instincts would have overridden his anger but that would be far too easy. As it was he was just about managing to restrain his ire to concentrate on assuaging his instincts. However, once he's gotten those settled there's a good chance that he'll blow his top in some form or another.

   Pacing around the rooms that his sister will be staying in outside TC, checking for any dangers or threats to her or the other girls staying with her, he takes the time to push his fury down to be dealt with later. First he needs to see to Clara.

   "Clear." He gives the signal and turns to watch as first Debbie and then Clara enter. Biggs follows them into the doorway turning to give the corridor a slow once over before closing the door and giving him a nod.

   Letting out an explosive sigh, Alec moves to take his sister in his arms, cradling her protectively, "Are you ok?"

   "I'm fine Lex." Clara wraps her arms around his waist beneath his jacket, so her hands rest against the tense muscles of his back. Craning her head to look up at him, she smiles reassuringly, "Really, I don't get it as bad as you."

   "But I've got more experience dealing with it." He frowns down at her worriedly, "Is your head hurting?" She shakes her head, leaning forwards to press her cheek over his heart. "Are you sure?"

   "I'm sure." She replies. "If things hadn't been interrupted, if _she_ hadn't have been interrupted, I probably would have." No secret as to who Clara means by _she_ , the annoyance in the tone of her voice gives it away. "Why do you put up with her speaking to you like that?"

   "She's not usually any where near as bad." Alec sighs, rubbing one hand over the back of his neck and up into his hair. 

   "But she does criticize you alot?" Clara frowns, lifting her head and stepping away slightly to look up at his face. He lets her go reluctantly and shrugs a little.

   "It's usually pretty amusing when she rants."

   "It sounded to me like she was repeating things she's said to you before." Alec looks up at Biggs' words, a little surprised at the thread of anger he can hear in his friend's voice.

   "Well the screw up, pain in the ass parts she has." Alec confirms.

   "And you put up with that why?" The indignant inquiry comes from Debbie, though he can see the same question on the lips of his friend and sister. "You wouldn't put up with it from anyone else."

"True, I wouldn't." Alec answers slowly, "I guess, I think I'm testing her." He frowns and meets Biggs' eye. "I want to see how long it takes her to wise up to things both where I'm concerned and with the rest of us."

   The older man raises an eyebrow as he asks, "And if she doesn't?" 

   "Then someone'll no doubt decide to educate her." Alec answers wryly.

   "But not you?"

   "No." Alec shakes his head, "And not you either."

   "No?"

   "No. I'd rather leave it up to the females."

   "Oh?" Debbie asks, a little too brightly.

   "The X5 females." Alec tells her pointedly, to which the girl pouts. "Max is, after all, one of them." The other three Transgenics snort in sync. "What?"

   "I don't think many of the X5 females would like to admit that." Clara informs her brother. "I know I wouldn't if she was the same series as me." She turns to Debbie, "Would you?" 

   "Hell no." The older girl looks nauseated at the thought. "She's a self-righteous bitch that thinks she's better than the rest of us; She's a jumped up beta who thinks she's an alpha." Debbie's words are scathing, and Clara nods in agreement. Alec is a little surprised at the reactions of both girls. Was it because they were both alpha females? He asks. 

   "No." Debbie shakes her head. "All the females think that. Alphas and betas."

   "Most of the males too." Biggs adds, "And many of the Transhumans."

   "Crap." Alec sighs and scrubs a hand over his face. "Crap."

   "Why?"

   "Because we need her knowledge of the Outside." He explains. "And there's her connection to Logan _and_ 'Eyes Only'." He can't help putting a mocking lilt on the word 'and'. The way Logan still insists on talking about EO as if it isn't his alter ego is ridiculous. As if any of their fellow Manticoreans haven't worked it out. Hello, genius IQ's? 

   “Also, I'm hoping that being around her own kind will eventually turn her back into the person she apparently used to be." Alec says with a slight smirk. " _That_ Max sounds like a riot."

   "What changed her?" 

   "What do you think?"

   "Logan Cale." The other three chorus, rolling their eyes.

   "Gee, how did you guess?"

   "Because he's a cock?" Clara asks innocently, smiling at her brother's look of dismay. "Sorry, my bad. I meant dick." He looks at her sourly. "What?"

   Pursing his lips, Alec moves on, "Anyway, I don't think he'd be that bad if he wasn't mooning over Max. Apparently he used to be less of a..." he trails off, and Clara giggles as she realizes what he's trying not to say. 

   "Less of a dick." She completes for him. He harrumphs and crosses his arms but reluctantly nods.

   “So what do we do about him?” Debbie asks as she starts rummaging in the cupboards of their rather pathetic kitchenette. “He knows too much.”

   “Do?” 

   “Yes, do.” Biggs snorts at Alec's wide eyed look of faux-innocence. “Ok let me rephrase that. What are we going to do that you haven't already done?” 

   The younger male smirks and then shrugs. “Not much we can do. I've copied everything he's got on Manticore as well as everything else. We had a hacked connection into his systems soon after I found out where the techies had set up shop in their little nests all over the city.” He smiles and shakes his head as Deb offers him a packet of chips laughing a little as his sister snatches it out of her hands. 

   “Does Max know?” Biggs declines his own offered bag and smiles as Clara snaffles that one too – girl certainly has a thing for them.

   “Do I look like an idiot?”

   “Not most of the time no.” Biggs smirks, “But sometimes I wonder.” He laughs and dodges the playful kick to his head. “So if we've got all of Cale's files why do we need him?”

   “He's still the point of contact for the 'Eyes Only Informant Net'.” Alec explains, putting on a pompous voice. “And because, while he may not be the heir to the Cale fortune any more he is still the heir to the name and prestige. That may turn out to be helpful.” 

   “Anything else?” Clara inquires astutely, knowing her brother probably has plenty more reasons. 

   “Maybe.” He grins, “Maybe I just want to see his face when he works out that all his years of hard work isn't as lost as he currently thinks, and it's all down to the fact that not only is he not the best hacker in town, but that he owes the safety of his files to the 'Happy-go-lucky Sociopath'.”

   “What?!” The growled question sounds in triplicate.

   “He called you that?” Clara asks indignantly.

   “Well,” He gestures casually, waving it off, “It's not like it isn't true. I _am_ a sociopath.”

   “Not by nature.” She insists. “And no more than the rest of us.”

   “It's part of our damned training.” Debbie adds.

   “Even his precious 452.” Biggs states angrily.

   “Well, yeah.” Alec shrugs. “But he's hardly going to admit that last little fact, not even to himself. Maybe especially to himself.”

   “Well he should.” Clara states, “One of these days she's gonna forget herself and say or do something to burst his little delusional bubble.”

   “Most likely.” 

   “I have a question.” Debbie asks, dropping onto a chair and curling up, “If even an accidental brush of 452's finger is poison to him, why exactly was he at the bar tonight?”

   “Stupidity?” Alec suggests carelessly.

   “Obsession?” Clara proposes in return.

   “Perhaps he's a masochist?” Biggs asks, “That may be why he's besotted with a female that can kick his ass so easily. Some kind of kinky fetish.” Alec looks at him in scandalized horror. “What?” His friend then gestures at the girls in reply.

   Rolling her eyes, Clara sighs in exasperation. “Honestly Alec, I'm not a kid anymore.”

   “Maybe not.” He tells her. “But you're my little sister, and you're only a teenager.”

   “You say that as if you're sixteen years older than me rather than six.” She snorts. “And you're hardly out of your teens yourself, you're only two years older than Debbie.”

   “And you'll _always_ be six years younger than I am.”

   “And _you'll_ always be one of the babies of the X5s.” She smirks at him and then turns to Biggs, “Isn't that right?”

   “Oh no, leave me out of it.” The older male raises his hands and takes a step back from the conversation. Smart man.

   “Anyway,” Clara continues, “Even if I were the youngest X6 of our family there's still the kids and the cubs...” She trails off as she realizes that Alec has been upset enough for the night, clumsily reminding him of the fact that most of the X8s, the X9s and the Transhuman youngsters are either dead or still in Manticore's, or worse the government's, hands, probably isn't a good thing right now. The room goes quiet and tense as Alec closes his eyes in pained guilt. She whispers, “I'm sorry. I didn't mean...” He shakes his head and opens eyes that mirror the misery on his face.

   “It's ok. I know you didn't mean anything.” He smiles weakly, “I guess you forgot? I do too sometimes, almost.” Dropping her snacks, she jumps to her feet wrapping her arms around him. She rubs her cheek against his chest in an attempt to comfort him. 

   In return, Alec hugs her back and gives her a slight squeeze, leaning down to press his nose to the top of her head. “We'll find them.” He tells her, tone firm despite the slight wobble in his voice. Turning his head to press the side of his face against her hair, he meets Biggs eyes, looking for reassurance. 

   “We will.” The other man states with quiet belief. The room falls quiet again, thoughtful and not quite as tense this time. 

   The silence is broken by Biggs' phone signaling a text message and making them all startle at the sudden sound. “Sorry.” He murmurs as he pulls his phone out.

   The others watch as reads the message, seeing his eyebrows raising in surprise before he purses his lips and rolls his eyes. “Cece.” He explains, “Says she's got things in hand and she'll see us tomorrow at Jam Pony.”

   Alec frowns at the reminder of how Cece had left Crash in pursuit of the distressed Transgenic that had sent his instincts into overdrive. “Does she say who it was?” He frowns harder at the negative answer he gets. “She knew who it was though, didn't she?” Biggs shrugs and avoids his eyes. Alec narrows his own eyes suspiciously, “You know who it was too.”

   “I have an idea.” 

   “Who is it? Who didn't want me to see their face?” Alec demands. “Why didn't Cece want me to follow him?”

   “Err...” Biggs shifts uncomfortably at his questions. “I think I'd best check with Cece first, in case I'm wrong.” He avoids his friend's intense gaze and the curious ones from the girls. He can sense Alec about to demand a better answer when the awkward situation is interrupted by the arrival of Clara and Debbie's room-mates, making their loud way down the corridor outside. His sigh of relief isn't missed by any of them, as he turns to open the door.

   The other four X6 girls pile into the room before coming to a sudden stop as they pick up on the atmosphere. Debbie and Clara are curious and a little amused and Biggs is uncomfortably avoiding Alec's glare. “Um... are we interrupting something?”

   “No.” Biggs answers quickly, plastering on a smile, “I was just leaving.” He goes to leave but freezes when Alec catches hold of the back of his jacket, heading the silent warning.

   “Since you've got nothing to do you can come and spar with me.” Alec tells him with smile that doesn't match the sharp look in his eyes. Biggs gulps and looks at Clara for help, but the younger girl just smirks at him, with Alec's smirk.

   “Sure.” He shrugs with false nonchalance. “I'll see you two at work tomorrow.” He smiles weakly at Debbie and Clara before heading out of the apartment to wait for Alec.

   Turning to his sister, Alec hugs her once more, “You'll be alright?” He asks, quietly

   “I'll be fine, I swear.” She assures him, “Debbie and the others are here to keep me company and 452 is nowhere near by, for tonight at least.” She grimaces at the thought of facing Max at work the next day. “Don't be too hard on Biggs.” She murmurs. Alec sighs and gives her a squeeze. 

   “Fine. I'll see you tomorrow then. Call me if you need anything.”

   “I will.” Clara smiles, bobbing up on tiptoe to kiss his cheek. “Goodnight.”

   “Night.” Out of the corner of his eye he can see a couple of the other girls making aww faces at them. Damned teenage girls. He heads for the door. “I'll see you in the morning Debbie.” The older girl nods and smiles. “Goodnight girls.”

   As he leaves, he hears a chorus of, “Goodnight Sir” prompting him to roll his eyes as he exits to be faced with a smirking Biggs. 

   “I don't know what you're looking so amused about.” Alec tells him pointedly and the smile drops from the older man's face. “Come on.” Biggs gulps a little and follows him down the corridor.


	8. CeCe and Ben

   Following Cece's directions, Ben drives down the ramp into the underground car park of a largely abandoned and condemned apartment block. Guiding his motorcycle carefully around the mounds and piles of rubbish and fallen concrete he parks near one of the back exits – hopefully if the place starts to collapse they can make it out that way. Yes, he is a pessimist.

   Once they've dismounted he spends a few long minutes pointlessly checking the bike over before he finally turns to face the older Transgenic and her questions. She's been watching him with arms crossed and she smirks at the fact that, once he does turn to her, he automatically comes to attention. “At ease soldier.” She says dryly. He does so with a slight grimace, one hand coming up to rub slightly at his temple. “What are you doing Ben? Why the sneaking around? Have you been in Seattle since the base was cauterized?”

   “Not really, I've been staying mostly at an abandoned farmhouse a few hours outside the city. Like I said, I needed to check he was ok.” He shrugs. “Max too, I guess.”

   “And how often have you been checking on them?” He just shrugs again so she prompts him, “Every six weeks?” A head shake. “Monthly?” Another head shake. “A couple of times a month?” A slight hesitation before he shakes his head again. 

   “Don't tell me you've been coming in and out every week?” Cece sighs and shakes her head. “How have you not been caught? Do you even have an ID and sector pass?”

   “No, no papers.” Ben ducks his head sheepishly. “And I don't know, I guess I've just been extra paranoid while traveling around. Or lucky.”

   “Lucky.” The blonde woman snorts. “Let's hope it's both.” Moving away from him slightly she takes a careful seat on a lump of concrete. “You know, I wouldn't be surprised if it was luck. Alec has always had the strangest luck. Sometimes incredibly good; but also sometimes bad, like when he was arrested a little while ago.”

   “Arrested?” Ben asks with a frown, coming over to lean against the wall beside her. “I didn't know that. What was he arrested for?”

   “You must have been out of town at the time.” She shrugs before fixing her intense gaze on him, ready to observe his reactions. “He was arrested for murder.”

   Blanching, Ben stares at her for a moment before asking, hesitantly “M...murder?”

   “Mm hmm. Serial murder. A witness ID'ed him, and the police got a DNA match against him.”

   Guilt fills his heart, and it's mirrored on his face for her to see before he covers it with both hands. Crouching down, he groans miserably, “God, he must hate me so much.”

   “Kinda hard for him to hate you when he thinks you're dead.”

   He looks up slowly, dropping his hands, the self loathing in his expression making way for confusion. “He thinks I'm dead? Why would Renfro tell him that?”

   “She didn't.” Cece shakes her head, “She intended to assign you to his command, remember.”

   “Then who...?” A pause, then a sigh, “Max must have told him.” Another wave of guilt passes over his face, though this time Cece isn't sure of the reason. “Has she told anyone...? Has she told him what happened?” Ben's voice rises a little in agitation.

   “Well, neither of them have told me anything about you, or told anyone else as far as I know.” She pauses and tilts her head questioningly, “Why, what happened? What does she know?”

   “I... I don't know that I should say.” Ben shifts uncomfortably as Cece glares at him. Lifting his chin a little, he says more firmly, “It's between Max and I.”

   “Fine. Don't tell me. But it better not be something I need to know.”

   “I don't see how it can be.”

   Narrowing her eyes, Cece lets it drop, but she has no intention of letting him avoid the rest of her questions. “Very well. Then lets go back to my original questions. What are you doing and why are you sneaking around behind Alec's back?”

   “I'm not sneaking!” Ben denies, “I'm...I'm just watching his back.” And what a brilliant job he'd done at that. Hell, his following him is probably what got him spotted by the police in the first place. 

   “Right.”

   “I am.” He insists. “I thought it would be better to watch out for him without him worrying that I'm...”

   “Gonna go insane again?”

   “I am not insane.” Ben growls out between his teeth, eyes meeting Cece's angrily. She lifts her lip in the tiniest snarl in response, making it clear to the younger Transgenic that she won't tolerate anything approaching a challenge. He immediately drops his eyes in submission. “I'm not.” He repeats, quietly, “I was ill.”

   “I know.” Cece nods, pleased at how quickly he responded to her dominance and struck by the difference to how Alec would have responded. She looks him over, taking in his once more hunched body language, at the shame on his face at the things he did in the grip of his madness. “I know you were ill.” She sighs, feeling a little guilty for needling him. 

   “Doesn't change anything though does it?” He asks, lifting his gaze to hers, the guilt and pain clear in his eyes. “Those men are still dead. I still killed them.” His mouth twists as he closes his eyes, “I still got Alec hurt.”

 

   Cece leaves him alone for a few minutes before saying, quietly, “He doesn't hate you.” Ben's eyes open and he stares at her in clear disbelief. “He doesn't. He hasn't for a while, a couple of years. Though, I'm not sure he ever really did.”

   “He must. I got him landed in re-indoctrination when he was _nine_.” She watches as he wraps his arms around his middle, hugging himself. “And I know that he got it worse than the rest. Christ, I don't know how he survived.”

   “Because he's stubborn. You both are.”

   Ben carries on, ignoring her comment. “Then I got him dragged into Psy Ops when I started killing.” Digging his fingers into his waist, he takes a shuddering breath, “I've read all the things they've done to him, because of me. God, it was bad, so, so bad.”

   Sighing, she reaches out to pull him closer. “Come here.” He takes a stumbling step and drops down onto the concrete block beside her. “I don't think he hates you.” She repeats. “Sure, he's been plenty pissed off at you, and he'll probably beat the crap out of you a couple of times. But he doesn't hate you.”

   He wants to believe her, he really does, but it's hard to imagine how it can be possible that his brother doesn't abhor the very thought of him. He's heard about the hard time that Brin's clone Keema gave her when they met, and Alec has been through so much more than her. Director Renfro made sure that Ben was intimately aware of everything that was done to his brother in Psy Ops, whether it was because of Ben's escape, his psychosis or for other reasons where Ben should have been there to help him, to support him.

   Cece watches as hope makes a brief appearance on his face then disappears beneath guilt and self-loathing. She makes another attempt to reassure him, “I mean it. He's even had arguments with some of the other X5Rs about you.”

   “He has?” Ben raises watery eyes to her face. “Really?” Cece feels her heart pang at how young he sounds, how desperate, the expression in his big, pretty eyes. Dear god, if he and Alec ever gang up on her she's doomed. Her tough bitch, no nonsense persona will be ruined. She just hopes that Ben isn't as much of a manipulative shit as Alec is.

   “Really. There was at least one occasion, he and Devon got into a knock down fight about the escape.” She tells him quickly, hoping to stave off any more emotional crap. “I think it's because Alec is a CO and expects his orders to be followed. So when you all got the order from 599, your CO, you had to obey. He thinks it should be obvious.”

   “Huh.” Ben frowns thoughtfully. It was true, and had been obvious to Ben, but he hadn't expected anyone outside his unit to see it that way. “Do you?”

   “What?”

   “Do you think we had to obey?”

   “I'm a CO. What do you think?”

   “I think that _you_ expect to be obeyed.” He tells her with a quirk to his lips. 

   “Damned straight I do.”

   The younger man chuckles weakly and looks away across the abandoned car park. They sit quietly for a few minutes, almost companionably, then Cece returns to the point of their conversation.

   “So, when are you going to stop sneaking around and let people know you're alive?”

   “ _You_ know I'm alive. 511 knows I'm alive.”

   “I meant Alec.” She smirks at his wide eyed look, “And Max.” Her smirk drops and she frowns when he flinches at 452's name. She wonders at it, and at his minor panic earlier at what the bitch might have told Alec. “You're afraid to let her know, aren't you?” He nods reluctantly. “More so than with Alec?”

   “I'm not _afraid_ to tell him.” Ben murmurs, “I just, don't want to be something else for him to stress about. I... I don't want him to look at me like, like...” He shrugs helplessly, “Hell, I don't know.”

   “He has a right to know.” Cece insists. “You're brothers.”  
   “I know.”  
   “He needs to know as our Commander.”  
   “I know.”  
   “He'll find out eventually.”  
   “I know.”  
   “It's better if somebody tells him rather than him working it out.”  
   “I know.”  
   “You should tell him before he catches you out.”  
   “God, I know.” Ben groans, rubbing his temples miserably.

   “You've got till last thing Saturday night.”

   “What?” He looks up at her in confusion.

   She repeats, “You've got till last thing Saturday night.” Cece stands up, looking down at him where he's looking at her in consternation.

   “That's only five days.” He states in a strangled voice.

   “Five days to pull yourself together and suck it up soldier.” He drops his head with a small sound of dismay. “If you haven't told him by Sunday morning, I'll tell him myself.” She vows and he gives her a look of panic which she just returns with a bland one. 

   “Come on.” She kicks him lightly in the shin before moving over to his motorcycle, “We can go to TC and find you a place there to fall back on. You can kit it out for next week.” Grinning wickedly she adds, “There's one on the same floor as Alec's.” He moans quietly in dejection and drags himself to his feet to follow, muttering about sadistic females.

   “Clara's on the same floor too.” Said sadistic female, tells him as he stands, pouting, beside her.

   “Who's Clara?”

   “She's the X6 I was with before you bolted from Crash.” Cece watches as he goes to climb onto the bike. “She's your little sister.” She laughs as he stumbles into the bike, knocking it over, then looks at her in shock, 

   “Sister?”


	9. X5E-511

   Biggs has always been considered by his fellow Transgenics and former handlers alike as one of the most affable and easygoing of the X5s. And they're right, he is one of the more mellow Transgenics, quick to smile and slow to anger. Not that he's a pushover or that he hasn't got a temper, because he isn't and he has – he's just generally a calm and well-balanced kind of guy. It's like he's got many of the positive personality traits that the geneticists were hoping for from the X5s without the negatives that some of his peers fall prey to.

   Perhaps that's why he's always been a successful CO of his platoon despite not being as aggressive as some, as controlling as others, as obsessively protective like X5-599 was or as stern as Cece is. 

   He's like Alec in many ways, or like Alec would have been if he hadn't spent so much time suffering in re-indoctrination and Psy Ops, or under so much strain and responsibility. 

   Though Alec puts up a good front of 'Always All Right' and 'Happy-go-lucky', Biggs knows that he is neither and he knows that right now Alec is neither alright nor happy. He's spent the day and evening by turns stressed, overprotective, upset and downright pissed off. Not that you can blame him. And not that he hasn't tried to push it down for Clara's sake, to put on a calm façade for the younger girl.

   But now that they've left Clara safely in her apartment, the façade of calmness has fallen. As Biggs watches Alec stalk down the stairs ahead of him, he can't help but wince at the thought of the ass kicking that he's heading for.

   “Get a move on Biggs,” Alec calls back to him, “I want to get to the gym asap.”

   “Sir, yes sir.” He acknowledges the words for the order they are and, wincing again, moves to catch up. This was so going to hurt.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Over an hour later, as he heavily hits the mat for the fifth time, he admits the accuracy of his prediction. He does hurt, riding a bicycle the next day was going to be uncomfortable, Transgenic healing or no, and he fully intends to pass on his misery. “Remind me to thank Cece tomorrow.” He says as he climbs back to his feet with a groan. It should be her here getting her ass kicked. Except no, if Biggs is right as to the identity of the mystery X, it should be X5-495 being turned into a giant bruise by his brother.

   “Oh don't worry about Cece.” Alec replies grimly, “She'll be getting hers.”

   “I'm sure I'll feel better about that when it happens,” Biggs tells the younger X5, “But strangely, that doesn't make me feel any better right this minute.”

   “Aww, does it smart?” Alec taunts him as they start to circle each other again, “Feeling those extra three years are we?”

   “Oh, fuck off Alex.” He launches a prolonged series of spin kicks at the other man and manages to knock him off balance long enough to drop low to the ground and take his feet out from under him. He grins darkly as he backs away to let his friend regain his feet.

   Jack-knifing back to standing Alec reaches up to touch the back of his head where it bounced off the mat and returns the grin, just as sharp, “That's better. I was starting to worry that this wouldn't be a decent workout.” 

   “Just worry about yourself and your pretty face, little brother.” Biggs answers with a slight growl, “We both know I can give you a more than decent fight.” Alec just smirks, gesturing for him to bring it on. Narrowing his eyes, Biggs does.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Another hour on and the two of them lie side by side on the mat, sweaty and exhausted. Their sparring session had drawn attention from other Transgenics in the vicinity. A number of them had wandered in to watch for a while before heading off to their duties or beds.

   Where normally such a session would have prompted many of them to call out praise or criticism, heckling or suggestions, (or in the case of the X6s, requests for demonstration and instruction), everyone who had entered the gym had picked up instinctually that tonight was not the night to draw Alec's attention and had instead watched silently before leaving. It was something that both of them had taken note of and which Biggs was now musing over. 

   It's somewhat impressive how every single X series and many of the Transhumans are so in tune with Alec's moods. It's a testament to his personality how he can command complete respect and obedience and yet be almost universally admired. X5-452 seems to be one of the exceptions that prove the rule – even her fellow escapee X5-734 had fallen under the spell of his charisma in pretty short order, looking to him with the same open admiration shown by the X8s. 

   Biggs himself has known Alec since the younger Transgenic had joined his unit, Unit 10, at the age of four. He'd been a tiny little thing, younger than the rest of their unit by three or four years, and had quickly endeared himself. He was sure that he wasn't the only member of their unit to worry about their baby brother when the units were re-ordered after the 09 escape. He'd been thankful at least that Gem had been assigned to the new Unit C with Alec, she'd always been zealously protective of the younger X5. Strangely, Alec had somehow gone from being the baby of Unit 10 to being the baby of Unit C, again three or four years younger than his unit mates. Many of them had pondered this fact over the years and wondered if it was an accidental coincidence or if someone had arranged it on purpose.

   His thoughts are interrupted when Alec rolls onto his side, facing him and propping himself up on one elbow. “Biggs? Who is he?” The question comes quietly and seriously and Biggs has to bite his lip to stop himself automatically answering with the truth, a fact that Alec seems to notice and frowns worriedly in response.

   “I... I'm not one hundred percent sure.” He starts. “And I'd rather not say until I am.” He raises a hand slightly as Alec opens his mouth to speak. “If I'm right, I don't think it's someone who's here to cause trouble, to bring danger to TC, or who'll cause you to worry – well, no more than you do naturally – and hopefully it'll work out to the good.” 

   Alec lays there in silence for a few moments. “You're sure?”

   “If I'm right about who it is, then yes, I'm sure.” When the younger man continues to look at him in worry and confusion Biggs reaches out to brush their hands together. “You trust me, right?”

   “Of course I do.” Is the vehement reply. 

   “Good.” Biggs smiles slightly, “Good. Well, trust that I'm right about this.”

   “Ok.”

   “I'm not saying that things will go smoothly if it is who I think, but I think it'll turn out good in the end. Maybe in ways that I can't guess at too.” Alec is still obviously perplexed by his words and he gives him a soft smile before climbing to his feet. “Come on, lets get cleaned up. It's late.” He holds out his hand to help him to his feet.

   “Ok.” Alec says again, taking the offered hand. He stops the older man before he can head to the showers, “Biggs, you know I'd trust you with my life, right?”

   “I know, little brother.” He smiles again, brighter this time with the affection of fifteen years of kinship. “I know.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   By the time they've dried off after their showers, Alec is practically asleep on his feet, and Biggs finds himself watching him in worry. “How long have you been awake?”

   “Hmm?” Alec blinks at him sleepily, “Oh, not too long, I didn't get up till 7am today, um, I mean yesterday.” Catching on to the other man's concern, he shakes his head in exasperation, “And yes, I slept fine, and I got more than my required 4 hours. I've also taken all my meds and eaten three balanced meals. I'm just a little sleepy, that's all.” He gives him a lopsided smile, “You must have tired me out on the mats.”

   “Must have.” Biggs tells himself not to worry - he'll just have a word with Cleo, one of their head medics, later today, make sure everything's fine. He's pretty sure she's been checking Alec's health a couple of times a week. Even if she didn't have an obsession with Alec's medical status – a carry over from when they were still in Manticore – she'd probably be doing so out of sheer boredom. 

   Like many of the Transhumans who have made their way to Seattle and into Terminal City, her appearance keeps her pretty much confined: the older woman has a little too much canine DNA, not as much as Joshua, but enough that it would be hard to hide out amongst paranoid humans on high alert due to the Transgenic 'threat'. 

   There's only so much administration, organization, stealthy renovations of buildings and preparations for the worst that the Transhumans can do stuck in TC without driving themselves, and each other, nuts. And so you have a large number of highly intelligent individuals continually trying to come up with new and interesting things to do to stave off boredom. Hence, the medical personnel's incessant monitoring of everyone else's health and medical status – their records have never been so meticulous, which is saying a lot. 

   Watching Alec slip into his leather jacket, Biggs sighs quietly and lets go of his concern, for now. He rolls his eyes as the younger Transgenic bumps their shoulders together playfully, “Come on Biggsy. Stop brooding, or I'll have to kick your ass a bit more.”

   “Sure, sure.” Biggs gives him a shove towards the door, before picking up his jacket and gym-bag, “Move your ass and attitude Lex. It's way past your bed time, baby brother.” 

   “Dude, you are so not funny.”  
   “I'm hilarious.”  
   “'course you are.”  
   “I am.”  
   “Uh huh.”  
   “Whatever.”

   Exiting the building housing the once state of the art and now looted gym, they come to a stop next to where they left their motorcycles to find only one waiting for them. “What the hell?” Biggs exclaims, “Where the hell's my bike?”

   Smirking Alec pulls a note off of the seat of his bike and reads it out loud. “Biggs, have borrowed your bike till tomorrow. Thanks. Cece.” 

   “She what?” Biggs asks, dismayed. “First she gets my ass kicked and now she hot-wires my bike?”

   “Seems so.” Replies Alec, amused. “Aww, don't worry, I'm sure those nasty girl germs won't hurt it.”

   “Her.”  
   “What?”  
   “The bike, she's a her not an it.”  
   “Dude, it's a motorcycle. They don't have genders.”  
   “Yours may not but mine does. And Cece'd better look after her.”

   “Oh for...” Alec looks skywards in disbelief before thrusting his duffel bag at the other man and climbing onto his bike. “Look, just come on. You can ride with me.”

   The straps of both bags across his chest, he climbs on with a huff. “Cece owes me for tonight.”

   “Yeah, yeah. Stop whining.” Before Biggs can reply, the other man starts the bike and accelerates quickly enough that he nearly throws him off the back of the seat.

   “Shit.” Biggs hisses, tightening his hold around Alec's middle. “You fucker.” He nearly smiles when Alec's laughter floats back to him, but scowls instead. “You just wait.”


	10. Alec

   Entering the Jam Pony premises to begin his shift, Alec glances around him, taking in who's there or not and doing his usual subtle assessment of the place for danger or threats. Starting over to the main desk to check in, he hears Max's breath hitch as she catches sight of him, a whole 30 seconds after the other Transgenics there. Her stare tries to burn itself into his head, but he just ignores it in the same way that he's pretty much ignored her the last two days.

   "Hey Boss." He greets Normal with the same smile he uses every day with the human, friendly but not too friendly, bright but not ingratiating. 

   "Rock Star." Normal returns his greeting with the same adoring smile that he gives him at the start of every shift, that makes Alec feel more than a little uncomfortable. "Early as usual. Nice to see some punctuality." Alec just shrugs a little. "Unlike _some_ of these ingrates you work with." The addition is accompanied by a snide glance towards Max and OC, where they're approaching the desk for their next set of deliveries.

   The comment meets with rolled eyes from Max and a cool stare from the older woman, before they both turn to greet Alec. "Alec. I didn't see you at Crash last night." Max comments quietly, her words a clear question.

   He simply stares stone-faced at her for a long moment before uttering a cool "Max." He turns away from her and her question and it's like a switch is flipped as he smiles warmly at Cindy before answering her greeting. "Morning OC. New clothes?" He glances down at her outfit, his eyes lingering ever so slightly in all the right places. He can see on her face that Cindy is torn between her position as Max's best friend and the fact that Alec is in the right. She's saved from the decision as Normal thrusts two packages across the desk at her, one nearly hitting her on the nose and prompting another glare. 

   “Bip, bip ladies.” Normal throws another two parcels to Max and Alec moves past her to the lockers, avoiding her eyes and smirking inwardly as he hears her huff of vexation. Little Maxie sure doesn't like being ignored, especially after he brushed off her so called 'apology' of two days ago and made it clear to her that her efforts just didn't impress.

   Stripping off his coat and sweater, he reaches out to make a juvenile attempt to push a sleepy Biggs' head into his locker. “Late night?”

   “Wouldn't you like to know?” Biggs smirks at him with masculine satisfaction as he shoves the younger man's hands away.

   “No, not really.” 

   “Well I, for one, would.” An eager voice states as Sketchy pops up beside them.

   “Hey, Sketch.” Alec greets him, lifting his fist to meet Sketchy's and tapping them together. “How did your date go?” The lanky human pulls a face. “That good huh?”

   “It was going well till I used that line, you know, how she was 'a unique creature, unlike any other'.” He pauses and gives Alec a pointed look, “Turns out she's heard it before.” Alec gives him a sheepish and slightly guilty look, actually blushing a little.

   “Sorry, man.”

   Biggs laughs as he slips the strap of his messenger bag over his head, “One of your lines Lexi?” 

   “Lexi?” Sketchy questions the nickname as Alec scowls at Biggs.

   “I wish you wouldn't call me that.” He whines, “I'm not a _girl_.”

   “Oh I don't know. I've seen you in drag remember.” Biggs replies with a wicked smirk as Sketchy's mouth drops open, “The girls complained horribly about how pretty you looked.” 

   “I remember that.” Cece comments as she passes them on the way to her own locker, “You looked adorable.”

   “You shut up.” Alec tells her testily, pointing one finger, “I'm still annoyed with you.”

   “Yes Sir.” Cece says with a wry twist to her lips, rubbing at her arm where she'd scraped it on the wall of the sewer. Alec smirks as he thinks of his revenge for her not telling him about the unknown X series that she'd pursued from Crash – two nights of helping to map out their most out of the way sewer caches. Biggs had been thrilled and had actually stopped whining about her borrowing his motorcycle. 

   “Drag? ” Sketchy wheezes out the question, pulling Alec's attention back to the conversation.

   “Yeah.” Biggs tells him with a shit eating grin. “He looked like the sweetest private schoolgirl you've ever seen.” He squeezes Alec's cheek then dodges his punch. 

   “Schoolgirl?” Shocked, Sketchy looks from one of them to the other.

   “Yep. We took pictures.” 

   “Bastards.” Alec scowls at the reminder. “I can't believe you all still make fun of me for that. I hate you.”

   “Hey now, we protected your virtue didn't we?” Biggs asks, raising both hands defensively. “Lane damn near took that one guy's head off.”

   “Virtue?” Sketchy's shock turns to concern, but he's still stuck on one word sentences.

   “Well yeah.” Alec shrugs, “I was fifteen, I was bound to attract attention dressed like that.” Of course, that was the whole point of the mission. 

   “Then, why?”

   “Lost a bet.” Shrugging again Alec meets Biggs' eyes, they can't exactly tell Sketchy the truth -that Alec had been sent on a mission to entrap a politician by playing to the old man's kink for pretty young boys dressed as even prettier young girls. And Biggs is right, he and Lane had stopped anyone else from paying too much attention and screwing the operation. Making fun of him for looking like such a pretty schoolgirl was also probably the only way any of them had managed to deal with the whole thing without killing anyone. And it's not like he was the only one to be sent on that type of assignment, it was just part of the whole growing up in Manticore shit.

   Accepting the explanation, Sketchy asks, “So you three grew up together or something?”, gesturing between Alec, Biggs and Cece.

   “Or something.” Biggs mutters. Alec flashes him a look before smiling at Sketchy.

   “Yeah, us and a few of the others. Went to the same school.” He can see Skye eavesdropping a little way from them before the other man turns and comments, 

   “So you're all army brats then?” The question makes Alec tense for a moment before Sketchy answers the other human.

   “Yeah. Alec's dad was based out west somewhere, where did you say?”

   “Wyoming, then he was transferred to Washington when I was sixteen.” Alec answers. Of course, the only one of the Transgenics working at Jam Pony that had been based in Wyoming was Max, but it was probably best for everyone involved if they went with her location, just in case. 

   “Right, that was it.”

   “How did you guess military?” Alec asks, smiling at Skye, making sure his face is open and curious rather than suspicious.

   “My dad grew up on an army base. Sometimes you do something that reminds me of him.”

   Damn, Max would be pissed if she knew it was Alec that had given something away. It couldn't have been any of the others could it?

   “And I've noticed Cece do some of the same things.” Skye continues. “Wasn't hard to guess why. Plus she just called you sir. Not quite the whole Sir, Yes Sir thing but...” He shrugs.

   “Ah, right.” Alec nods but inside he's cursing; Skye is a huge gossip. He's just glad that he'd already spun a line to Sketchy and Normal about being from a military family and rebelling against his dad's expectations. Hopefully, it won't come back to bite him or anyone else on the ass.

   “BIP, BIP, YOU REPROBATES. THESE PARCELS WON'T DELIVER THEMSELVES.” The yell from out front interrupts them and everyone within earshot rolls their eyes, Alec included. “THAT'S WHAT I PAY YOU MORONS FOR. BIP, BIP.”

   “Duty calls.” Biggs comments as Skye moves away from them, punching Alec lightly on the bicep, “See you later.”

   “Later.” Alec agrees, pulling a hoody and his cycling gloves out of his locker. “You coming to Crash tonight Sketch?” 

   “Of course dude. Do you even really need to ask?”

   “Guess not.” Alec grins at him lightly before the other man walks away. He quickly finishes getting himself ready for his shift and soon finds himself leaving on his runs moments after Cece. He calls out to her, as she goes to climb on her bike. “Hey Cece, going to tell me yet?”

   “No Alec.” Cece sighs and turns to look at him, “I told you, it's not my place.”

   “And like I told you, I have no idea why you would think that.”

   “You'll see.” She says cryptically which makes him scowl. He hisses when she flicks him on his forehead. “Stop frowning. You don't want wrinkles now do you? Might make you less pretty.”

   “Fuck off.” He bats her hand away. “We both know that nothing can make this face less pretty.”

   “So arrogant.” She says, shaking her head.

   “S'not arrogance if it's true.” He returns with a cocky grin which soon drops. “Seriously C. Give me a clue here. Should I be worried about...whoever it is?”

   “Nope.” She smiles and shakes her head, pausing until he scowls again, “And anyway, I told him that I'd tell you myself on Sunday if he hasn't spoken to you by then.” 

   He flails one hand to the side, “So what the hell was the whole 'not your place' thing about if you're going to tell me on Sunday? Why not just tell me anyway?”

   “You'll see.” She gives him a bright smile and pats him on the arm, jumping on her bike and riding away before he can say anything more. Alec just sighs in irritation and heads out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Parking his motorcycle in their makeshift garage on the east side of Terminal City, Alec quickly climbs the stairs to the roof. The Transgenics have all found it easier to move from the outer parts of the sector - which are populated by the more desperate homeless of Seattle, to the inner parts - where they've set themselves up, by roof or sewer as much as possible to avoid too much attention from the humans.

   Once in their part of the sector he returns to ground level and ambles towards Command. He's a few minutes out when he freezes in trepidation and starts to look around warily. Placing his back to the wall he considers his options, biting his lip. He really doesn't want to go through it again, it will make it three times in a week. He decides to make a dash for Command and the promise of making himself busy and begins to move once again, quicker this time.

   Turning a corner he freezes again. “Shit.”

   “Charming.” The woman in front of him sniffs, looking him up and down.

   “Cleo.” Alec says, smiling brightly, but it doesn't hide the dismay around his eyes. “What can I do for you?”

   “You can quit avoiding me and come along to medical.” She tells him, before taking ahold of his arm and starting to haul him along.

   “I can't, I'm needed in Command.” He digs his heels in and brings them to a halt.

   “No you aren't, I've checked.” She tells him with another sniff and a small growl of annoyance. “You're not due for another hour at least. Plenty of time.”

   “Plenty of time for what?” Alec asks warily.

   “A check up ...”

   “What? Another one?” He interrupts her incredulously.

   “... and some tests.” Cleo glares at him a little before pulling on his arm and forcing him to move with her or loose it. She used to hate being so big and strong, so ungainly, but since the X5s came into their adult heights and strengths she's been thankful for it. It means that she can still manhandle them when they're being stubborn, like Alec so often is.

   “What tests? I don't need any tests.” There's a slight whine in Alec's voice as he tries to get out of her hold. “I'm perfectly fine. Everything's good.”

   “Then the tests will show that.”

   “I could order you to let me go.”

   “Go ahead.” Cleo turns to give him a wide, toothy grin. “Won't do you any good. Weren't you the one to reinstate the command structure?” Alec scowls at her. “That means that as the head medic assigned to your Platoon, outside of combat, I can ignore your orders when it comes to your health. You know this.”

   “But there's nothing wrong with my health!” He objects. “No injuries, no seizures, no migraines, nada. Everything is fine.”

   “Best to make sure.”

   “Cleeeeoo.” 

   “Whine all you like.” Reaching the door to their medical 'facility', she opens it and shoves him inside. “Doesn't make a difference to me.”


	11. Joshua

__  
March 1995

_Nine year old Joshua sat quietly before the bare fireplace in his Father's office, watching his younger brother, Isaac, frown over his algebra workbook. A sound of frustration caused both boys to raise their heads and look across the room._

_“Damned government blockheads.” Shaking his head, Sandeman tossed the report he was reading aside. “Why do I find myself continually curbing their nonsensical demands. Didn't they learn anything from the disaster of the X2s?”_

_“Father?” Isaac called out in his soft, little boy voice. “Can we help?”_

_The inquiry prompted a softening of tired features as the man they called Father pushed away from his desk and rose, coming across the room to where the two boys sat. “No, my Isaac. Don't you worry about it, the two of you need only worry about your studies. Thank you for asking though.” He reached out and brushed a hand over his youngest son's hair._

_Joshua watched the exchange, wishing he knew of a way to make his Father's work easier, to take away some of the strain and tiredness he could smell on his Father's skin. But he's just a boy and he had so much to learn before he could help in his Father's quest. Isaac put down his book, stood and reached to be lifted up. Their Father acquiesced with a smile and a chuckle. The older boy sometimes wished he were still young enough to be picked up like that, but he's a whole year older than Isaac and much taller, he's too grown up now._

_Watching as Father danced around the office slightly with Isaac giggling in his arms, Joshua had a flash of inspiration. He may not be able to help with work but he knew the things that made his Father smile. “Can we go watch some of the younger ones?” He asked quietly. “Please?”_

_“Oh! Yes Father can we please?” Isaac added his own entreaty. There was only a short hesitation before Sandeman gave in to the almost literal puppy dog gazes from both his boys._

_“Very well, we'll go and see the X1s. But only for a little while. It's important that both you and they attend to your studies.”_

_“Yes, Father.”  
   “Yes, Father.”_

_“Come along then.” Letting Isaac slide down to his feet, he took his hand before reaching his other hand for Joshua. “Let us see how they are getting on today.”_

_The three of them made their way out of the room and through Manticore's Missouri base. As they passed through the corridors Joshua stared through the windows at the thick forest surrounding the base and hiding it from prying eyes. They soon reached their destination and paused, standing in the doorway of a classroom where a group of 6 year old X1s were kneeling on the floor surrounded by pieces of radio equipment, putting their lessons to use and learning by experimentation how it all fit together._

_A gentle hand on Joshua's back pressed him forward towards them, urging him to join in. A couple of the X1s looked up at Sandeman with small smiles, aware as soon as they'd entered the room, if not before, who it had been approaching them. Their senses and instincts were honed just as Joshua's were, and they were aware that adults were not always to be trusted._

_One of the smaller females held out a screwdriver to larger male, “Here.”  
_

   “Here.”  
   Joshua blinks as one of the smaller X1 females hands a screwdriver to a larger male, and looks up from his sketch, watching for a minute or so as they continue to assemble a number of computers from spare parts. He looks back down at his sketch pad and the drawing there of the X1s busy at their work and gossip.

   He's been sitting quietly for a good hour now, sketching away as they talk, and he thinks they may even have forgotten he's there, tucked away in a corner. Their talk has ranged from a frivolous discussion about some TV programs, to the latest astronomical discoveries by the Chinese, to a discussion about theology and on to the anti-Transgenic opinions of the religious groups speaking up on TV and back to the frivolous with a spirited argument about the comparative merits of soft drinks. Not forgetting the necessary gossip about who's dating, or sleeping with, or dumping who in Terminal City.

 

   “What about the escapee, 452?” One guy asks.  
   “What about her?”  
   “Who do you think she's got the hots for?”  
   “No-one. She's apparently fixated on some Ordinary that's our age.” Answers one of the females with a sneer.  
   “Really? Why?”  
   “Who knows.”  
   “Who cares, more like.”

 

   Joshua frowns as the discussion, having turned to Max, goes sour.

 

   “Probably for the best that she sticks to her pet human anyway.”  
   “Why do you say that? He's Ordinary.”  
   “Don't you know? She wants to be one of them.” Another sneer that quickly makes its way across the faces of each of the group.  
   “Why the hell would she want to be an Ordinary? Isn't it bad enough she's an 09er?”

 

   Joshua flinches and bites back a growl at the way they are discussing his Little Fella. Why do they all dislike her so much?

 

   “Look.” One of them interrupts, “Why the hell are we discussing the bitch? She doesn't want to be one of us, thinks she's better than us. Let's just leave her to her filthy humans. We've got enough to be going on with.”

   “Didn't you hear about the other night? What she said to the Commander?” A murmur of anger moves around the circle of Xs.

   “I heard; everybody's heard. And I don't know about the rest of you, but I refuse to give the bitch the consideration of any more of my time and thoughts until some one decides to put her in her place.” Another murmur, this time of agreement, and they all go quiet for a minute until someone clears their throat and changes the subject.

 

   Biting his lip, Joshua closes his eyes as he thinks about what he's just heard and what he knows about the events of Monday night that have got so many of his fellow Manticore refugees in a state of outrage. He'd heard the full story yesterday from Biggs, after floundering, trying to put it together from rumors and snatches of conversation and being witness to the failed apology Max made to Alec. He'd been disappointed in Max and hurt on Alec's behalf.

   He knows that early on Max had a pretty poor opinion of Alec and had sometimes acted nastily towards him, but he'd thought that she'd got past her first impression and the results of Alec's naïve mistakes. The two of them have been through so much the last months that Joshua had become hopeful that they were friends, that Max had come to value Alec the way that Joshua himself does. Part of him still thinks that, and maybe he'll be proved right. Max had apologized to Alec after all, sort of, and Alec is forgiving to his friends.

   But in the meantime, Max's actions and behavior towards the other X5 is causing her problems, and she doesn't even seem to realize. And Joshua doesn't know how to tell her the truth about Alec, and himself, and the others. Sometimes he feels so stupid that, despite all his intelligence and learning, he has trouble communicating what he wants to say, fumbling his words and saying everything wrong. He wishes he was more like Father. 

   Everything was so much better when Father was around for Joshua, and Isaac, and all of the others. But then it all changed in late 2006 when Father was forced to flee Manticore, to leave them all behind in order to protect them.

 

   After Sandeman fled, not one of the Transgenics or Transhumans had what any sane person would consider a good, healthy, safe or easy life – if they actually ever had. They all suffered through tests and experiments, through rigorous and harsh training, through inhumane and humiliating treatment. 

   The Anomalies were all confined to the basement, treated like they were a useless drain, but expected at the same time to make themselves useful to Manticore. All except the most extreme amongst them - the 'Nomlies', the crippled, mindless or insane – who, when they weren't put out of Manticore's misery, were kept alive in cells and cages just so that they could suffer through battery after barrage after assault of horrendous experiments. Then, there are the IT concentrates who were treated like machines; almost confined to their drab workrooms. They worked ridiculously long hours collating, analyzing and reporting data, churning out predictions about anything and everything pertaining to Manticore, their soldiers and their staff, no matter how petty or small, and punished whenever their predictions turned out false. 

   Next were the Psy Ops Transgenics who were forced to use their skills on the Transhuman and X series soldiers for the slightest or most arbitrary reasons in cruel and dreadful ways, despite their own distress, and to such an extent that a great many of their fellow Transgenics saw them as betrayers. Finally, the soldier Transgenics, whether X series or Transhuman, were put through the harshest and most brutal training their handlers and trainers could come up with in their sick little minds. It started in infancy and never stopped until Manticore tried to burn so many of them alive in their barracks. It was so unrelenting and awful that even being sent into the worst war zones on the planet was seen as a relief.

   And amongst each type of Manticore's children, some had it worse than others. For the Xs most of those were in the Revised Detachment. R Detachment was made up of Xs from each series, baring the X7s. Chosen – no, not chosen, sentenced – because they were in the same unit as, or were the clones or siblings of, those Transgenics that escaped, or tried to escape, from the Wyoming base in 2009. They were those who went through re-indoctrination to stamp out every thought, or possibility of thought, of escape or mutiny. R Detachment is made up of all those such unfortunates, or at least those that survived. And of all of them it was X5-494 who had it worst on the road to becoming X5R-494.

   But 494 survived re-indoctrination in 2009 and everything that came after, perhaps not unscathed, but undiminished. He hadn't lost his clever mind, his strong will, his sarcastic tongue, or his kind heart – or his name. In time his designation changed from X5R-494 to X5RE-494 but again he remained Alexander, and he is Alexander still.

   Joshua has long felt a kinship to the boy that became his friend Alec. Perhaps it was because they both lost the brother with whom they'd had a strong bond: Alec lost Ben first to Lydecker's plans and then to The Escape; Joshua lost Isaac to grief and then madness. He does not know which is worse, being separated from a twin as a toddler and never seeing him again, or watching the younger brother you'd loved for nearly twenty years loose his mind. Twenty years of memories turned painful or twenty years of memories stolen. Perhaps that kinship is why Joshua can so easily forgive Alec his mistakes where Max finds it near impossible. 

   Perhaps what she has shared with Alec this last half year will eventually allow her to learn to see him as he really is, as Joshua sees him? He hopes so, and he hopes she does so before it's too late, before Alec gives up and turns his back on her, and the rest of the X Series with him. Because it is due to Alec's friendship and regard for Max that the X Series have given her a chance; it is the reason that they have given her the opportunity to prove that she is not the deserter that Manticore painted her as. 

   The Transhumans have let her in because Joshua has spoken for her, told them how she has been a friend to him, helped him, that she's a good person. So they too have given her a chance, to show them what kind of person she is. But he fears that she has not made the most of those chances.

   The older man has learned much about his Little Fella in the months since they met, her good side and some of her bad. Yet the others, he knows, have mostly seen only the bad. And it hurts to hear them speak of her with disdain. They call her self-righteous, patronizing and arrogant. Maybe she is. But she's also compassionate and kind, giving and caring; things the others do not see, things he wants the others to see. But he cannot force them to see that side of her, Max needs to show them herself. The question is, when will Max realize that she must? And will she be able to bring herself to do so?


	12. DAC-261

   Pushing away the pile of paperwork in front of him, Mole reaches for his zippo to relight the cigar that has gone out while he was caught up in the reports. Taking a deep breath he relishes the feel of the smoke in his lungs before breathing it out with a pleased sigh. “Status?” He murmurs in the direction of the security hub.

   “All quiet.” There's an almost regretful sigh from the X5 watching the security monitors, prompting Mole to roll his eyes. 

   “Police?”

   “Busy with some Steelheads rioting in Sector 4.” Answers one of the X6s listening into the police frequencies.

   “Media?”

   “Same line of prejudiced crap as yesterday.” Luke's face twists with annoyance. “Bet it makes you soldier types proud to have fought for them.”

   “Yeah, just warms my sunbaked heart.” Mole snorts. “Damned apes.”

   “Oi.” The exclamation comes from Rufus, one of the Transhumans with plenty of orangutan DNA, who is hanging from the ceiling as he tinkers with wiring from the 'discreetly acquired' satellite receivers hidden on the roof of Command. 

   “Sorry.” Mole grunts in his direction. “I meant damned humans, of course."

   “Of course.” Is the dry reply.

   “Dix?” Mole asks the Anomaly currently hacked into the nearest army base.

   “Nothing much. That NSA dick White's been throwing his weight around and pissing off the Brass.”

   “Good, good. Maybe somebody'll put a bullet in his brain and put him out of our misery.”

   “We can only hope.” Dix says with a grin. “Might put 452 in a better mood.” A chorus of snorts follows that suggestion. “What? It might.”

   “Do you know what'd put _me_ in a better mood?” The question comes from behind him. He looks over to see that X6R-704 has arrived with a plastic bag full of computer chips that she drops on the table next to the bank of computers. “Somebody giving 452 a couple of black eyes.”

   “Still haven't warmed up to our illustrious 'Leader'?” Mole asks her around his cigar. She graces him with a speaking look that makes him smirk. “When's your Commander going to deal with her?”

   Debbie grimaces, “Alec says he's waiting for the X5 females to decide to deal with her.” All the X series in Command perk up at that, “But I'm not sure if he's actually giving permission though.”

   “I swear you Xs like making things complicated for yourselves.” Mole shakes his head. He's of the opinion that all that mammalian DNA makes the Xs act like idiots half the time, genius minds not withstanding. Makes him glad he's a reptilian model.

   A ripple of tension moves through the room which tells him that one of the subjects of their discussion is heading this way. Since it feels like the stillness before an explosion rather than the tenseness of anticipation, and Rufus is swiftly concealing his work, it must be 452. Joy.

   As she enters the building and heads towards the stairs to the raised area, he watches Dix quickly hide what he's been doing on the computer and turn towards the bag of computer chips. By the time she arrives he's looking industrious and innocent.

   “Hey guys.” Max gestures vaguely as she leans against the rail. “Everything ok?”

   There's a slight pause before Luke answers her, “Everything's fine.” 

   “Yep. Fine.” Echoes Dix, smiling brightly at her. Mole rolls his eyes, he's such a soft touch, never would have managed in combat.

   “Mole.” Max's attention turns to Mole, and becomes less friendly. Mole is fully aware that she doesn't like him: he's too openly military, too gruff, too trigger-happy (he glances fondly at the shotgun propped up beside his chair), he's too belligerent (ha, like she isn't), totally unimpressed with her and completely unwilling to fall in line with her pronouncements.

   “Max.” He replies neutrally. Neutrally for him anyway. 

   “Seen Alec?”

   “Princess ain't due for another 15 minutes.” He takes a long draw on his cigar and blows the smoke out slowly. “Why?” 

“No reason.” She shrugs with an attempt at disinterest. “Anything on the police frequencies?” Mole raises an eyebrow at her and gestures towards the X6s doing the monitoring. She huffs and turns to repeat the question to them. 

   All four of them turn and look at her coolly for a moment before the eldest answers her. “No.” The answer is short and flat and followed by them immediately turning their backs on her. Mole hides his amusement behind the hand holding his cigar. She huffs again and flounces back down the stairs to try and find out what some of the others in HQ are doing. 

   As usual her attempts go almost nowhere – everyone is unfailingly polite and blatantly distant. On one hand he admires her persistence in trying to engage with her fellow Transgenics, but on the other it's fucking annoying how she patronizes them all and makes no attempt to hide the fact that she thinks she's better than the rest of them. Though most hold her 09er status against her, it's her behavior and attitude that prevents her from really getting anywhere. 

   The DAC watches as she moves from one group to another, getting more annoyed at each courteous brush off. He wonders how long it will be before she has another series of tantrums like she did earlier in the week. Hopefully this time she won't aim her temper at Alec; the boy is being far too patient with her for some unfathomable reason, and Mole is dying to see someone hand her her ass.

   He's got a bet going with some of the other Transhuman COs as to who out of the Xs in TC will break first and land her on her butt. They're all agreed that it won't be one of the alphas, but other than that they all have their own opinions. No doubt, with Debbie's report that Alec is standing aside for the X5 females to deal with her, some of them will be altering their bets.

   Clearly seething, Max makes her way back up to the raised area after the final brush off. “Something wrong?” Mole asks her mildly.

   “Nothing.” She answers through gritted teeth and a fake smile. He watches blandly as she snatches up the pile of reports he was reading earlier and makes her way over to the decrepit couch pushed against the back wall. He watches her brow furrow as she realizes she has no idea what the reports really say. It's all in the working shorthand that they've all developed over the years, years she wasn't there to learn it, and have been routinely using here in TC.

   Instead of asking for an explanation she just stubbornly carries on trying to read them and Mole returns to watching the happenings around Command. The irony, of course, is that one of those reports is about the progress that the medics are making on their project to work out methods of combating the various things that some of the Manticore population have had injected or pumped into their bodies as weapons over the years. Things like that DNA targeted retrovirus that Max herself is carrying around to kill one Logan Cale.

   Logan Cale, Eyes Only, do-gooder cyberjournalist on a warrior for justice kick. Mole hasn't yet had the 'honor' of meeting their of oh so generous (genocidal) benefactor yet and he's really not sure that he wants to. By all accounts it's from him that Max has caught her holier-than-thou, centre of the universe attitude from. Whether it's that attitude specifically or her general demeanour that makes him dislike her, he doesn't really know or care. He's got enough to worry about mediating between the rest of the X Series and his Transhumans.

   Relations between the Transhumans and the X Series have never been all that brilliant, and Mole personally has never been able to stand the sight of most of them. However, some of the things the X series have endured over the years have made him realize that, though they may have had it better than the Transhumans on the whole, they weren't really viewed any differently by most of the humans around them. 

   Mole can remember seeing 494 near the end of his first trip through re-indoctrination and being shocked by the sight of what he had thought was an X6 boy. When he'd realized he was an X5 he'd been even more appalled – the child looked like a famine victim anyway but whatever they'd done made him look painfully small and vulnerable. The flash of rage seeing him had evoked had shocked the cool-blooded DAC; he'd wanted to snap the necks of the stone-faced white coats wheeling the boy down a corridor, still strapped down to a gurney despite his clear weakness.

   Manticore formed the Revised Detachment after the 2009 escape and while it was mostly made up of Xs, there were a small number of Transhumans and even a few Anomalies amongst them, enough to allow some communication between the three groups and an end to the use of the Anomalies as a threat to keep the X children in line. 

   Mole and Birdie, the leader of the Anomalies, had been furious to find out that they'd been turned into creatures of nightmare for the X youngsters and had given word that the less threatening amongst their number should try to combat this view. It had been slow going, and the older Xs had had to help, but in the end it worked. The younger X6s, and the X8s and 9s were free of the ingrained fears held by most of the X5s and older 6s when they were children; and of those children, most of them had managed to overcome their fears.

   The mixed nature of the R Detachment helped greatly, and their CO had impressed even some of the most hard nosed Transhumans and Anomalies such as Mole himself. He could appreciate the stubborn determination of the young X5; and it had helped that 494 was a smart-mouthed little shit who delighted in pushing the human handlers to the edge of what he could get away with.

 

   As if his thoughts have conjured him, 494 storms into Command, slamming the door open and then stomping up the stairs to the raised computer area. Mole watches in amusement as every one other than 452 and Mole himself tenses in response to Alec's clear mood. 

   “Something wrong Princess?” Mole asks him with a smile which widens when the younger man glowers at him.

   “Which one of you told Cleo that I wasn't needed in Command when she came here?” He looks at each of them in turn, making Dix squeak and the X6s hunch down in their seats. 

   “Who's Cleo?” Max asks. Nobody answers her.

   “Don't look at me.” Debbie smiles innocently from where she and Luke are sorting through computer parts. “Your bike was already in the garage when I parked up, so it must have been before I arrived.”

   “And the rest of you?” Alec crosses his arms when no one meets his eyes. “I can't believe it!” He hisses, “Why couldn't one of you have come up with something to fob her off?”

   “Who's Cleo?” Max repeats, louder.

   “Instead of sending her off to lay in wait for when I arrived. Letting her drag me off to her goddamn lair.”

   “Her lair?” Mole asks, still grinning. “Being a little dramatic aren't you?” Alec gives him a filthy look. “Aww poor kitty. Did the bad doggy hurt you?”

   “Piss off lizardbrain!” Alec snarls.

   “I said who's Cleo?” Max slams the reports back in front of Mole and glares at them all. “I don't appreciate being ignored.”

   “Well I don't frickin' appreciate being poked and prodded and frickin' tested for the third time in a frickin' week!” Alec grinds out. Max's eyes widen in response and she takes a nervous step back before catching herself.

   “Who's Cleo?”

   “Alec's personal medic.” Mole answers, prompting a growl and glare from the X5 male.

   “She is _not_ my personal medic, though I'm starting to bloody wonder.” Slinging his leather jacket across one of the chairs 494 pulls the taped on cotton wool off the crook of his elbow with a sound of aggravation. Max frowns at his actions, clearly wondering why someone's been taking blood samples from him.

   “Are you ok?” She asks. Mole can hear the actual concern in her voice too, will wonders never cease?

   “Fine.” 

   “You sure?”

   “God, not you too.” The X5 male flicks the cotton ball into the nearest bin. “What is it with everyone? I'm perfectly friggin fine.” Turning to Mole, he narrows his eyes, “And you can stop grinning. It's not funny.”

   “Course not.” 

   Alec glowers at him for a moment before turning it on the rest of them. “I'll be on the roof.” 

   With that he disappears through the door to the stairs, slamming it hard enough behind him to rattle the desks. Mole hears Max take a shaky breath as she stares wide eyed at the door. Her mouth opens and closes a couple of times before she manages to form a question.

   “Why is he so angry?” She asks, not directing the question at anyone in particular.

   “Angry?” Mole snorts, “That wasn't Alec angry. That was just a hissy fit. He has them occasionally.” He raises an eyebrow when Max goggles at him slightly. “What?”

   “Not angry?”

   “Not really, no.” Dix answers her, “Angry is an 8 out of 10. That was just a … 3?” He glances at the others for confirmation. “Yes, a three.”

   “What?”

   “The scale of Alec's temper. That was a just a 3.”

   “You guys have a scale for Alec's temper.” She looks around, flabbergasted, as they all nod.

   “Well, yeah.” Luke shrugs then adds, smirking at Mole. “We have one for Mole too.” The other man flips him the finger. Max blinks in consternation for a few moments before turning to Debbie.

   “So what was the other night?”

   “Hmm?” The other girl looks up from the motherboard she was considering.

   “Alec's temper, what was the other night at Crash?”

   “Oh right,” Debbie tilts her head thoughtfully, “I'd say a 6 – Pissed.”

   “Six?” Max's voice goes high in disbelief. “Only a 6?”

   “Yeah.” 

   Mole snickers and Max turns to glare at him. “Something to say?” He asks her, drawling.

   “You're playing me.”

   “Nope, not a bit.” He shakes his head, putting out the the butt of his cigar. “Believe me, you have not seen him properly angry, and you don't want to.” Max makes an ugly noise of skepticism and raises her chin arrogantly. 

   “You really don't.” One of the X6s pipes up. “Even Renfro tried to avoid making him angry. I once heard her telling one of the Brass that he was welcome to risk 494s wrath if he fancied having his head ripped off, but she wanted no part of it or his ridiculous orders.” 

   “Smart woman.” Mole grunts, causing Max to look at him in incredulity, “Cold hearted bitch, but smart.”


	13. Max

   It's full dark by the time Max pulls to a stop in the garage, mission accomplished. She is smiling as she climbs from her bike, her cheeks are flushed with satisfaction and adrenaline at thwarting Ames White and his NSA stooges yet again. Despite things threatening to go sideways, not only had they rescued the two original Transgenics they'd set out to save, but they'd also rescued a good number of others. She watches as they alight from the stolen van to be surrounded by a crowd of medics and her smile widens.

   Her smile dims ever so slightly as Alec pulls to a stop beside her and dismounts. “Have you been shot?” She asks him, wincing as she realizes how her honest inquiry could be taken as a dig.

   “No.” He answers her shortly before turning away and heading over to the crowd of rescuees and medical personnel. She grimaces as he walks away from her. It's clear he's still giving her the cold shoulder and she feels more than a little put out – after all, she'd apologized. You'd think that the successful rescue would have put him in a better mood than this afternoon.

   She can see him moving amongst the others, sharing a few words with each of those they'd rescued and some of the medics. She frowns a little as she watches one of the Xs reach out to brush his arm causing Alec to flinch away before catching himself and returning the light touch. 'What's that about?' She wonders.

   After a few minutes he heads back towards her, “Coming?” he asks as he passes her on the way to the door where the rest of the rescue team are waiting for them.

   “Yeah.” She murmurs, glancing once over her shoulder before she moves to catch up. 

   As they head towards Command, she finds her spirits rising again at their success and at the memory of White's angry and pinched face in the moments before he was forced to move out of the way of Max and Alec's motorcycles, having failed to shoot them off. She grins as she speeds her steps as they approach the door.

   Entering first, she looks around for a moment before climbing the stairs to the command hub where Mole is waiting. She's surprised to see that he, Dix and Cece are wearing communication headsets. Alec brushes past her as she pauses, grabbing a box off the desk and dropping something small and black into it. She watches as he passes it off and the box makes its way from one member of the rescue team to another, each of them dropping a dinky black object into it. It isn't until Alec removes a small black box from his inside pocket, which he drops into another box, that she realizes what's going on: they'd all been wearing tactical ear comm units.

   “What the hell!” She says angrily, as he passes on the second box. “Where did you get those? And why the hell wasn't I wearing one?” Alec just glances at her wearily before picking up a pile of paper work and dropping into a chair. Her mouth twists in annoyance and she moves towards him, “I said...”

   She halts when she comes face to chest with Mole and she glowers up at the tall Transhuman as she goes to move around him. He steps sideways to block her again and she looks up to see him glaring down at her.

   “What was that? Why didn't you have one?” He asks through the cigar clenched between his teeth, he continues as she crosses her arms and sneers, at him “I don't know.” He removes his cigar and sneers back. “Maybe because you didn't bother to wait for the briefing before you went haring off?”

   “What briefing?”

   “The briefing that the rest of the team stayed for.”

   “Alec didn't...”

   “Because Alec made sure to grab a comm unit, and made sure that the rest of the team knew that he was going on ahead. And he listened to and took instruction from the briefing. The briefing that was intended to make sure that everyone knew what the situation was, what they were doing and to ensure that everyone stayed alive.”

   “Everyone _did_ stay alive.” 

   “No thanks to you!” Mole rumbles as she goes to punch him and he grabs her arm, shoving her away from him. “I heard how you went off half-cocked and nearly got half the team shot.” He gestures angrily at the headset he's still wearing. “The only reason they weren't is because they have the experience that you don't and, apparently, the common sense and patience that you lack.”

   “Now you listen...” She starts infuriated.

   “No, _you_ listen 452.” Mole takes a step towards her. “You have no combat or extraction experience, we do. You have little tactical experience,” He takes another step towards her, “We have more than enough. You are arrogant and stupid. We may be arrogant, but we are far from stupid.” Another step, “Which is why we had a briefing, a plan, and contingencies.” And another step. “It's why we didn't assign you to a Section. And it's why we assigned a Section purely to minimize the damage that you would cause if you went off half-cocked, which you did, predictably.” He takes a final step towards her, looming over her. “You are very lucky, girl, that you didn't get everyone killed.” He moves away from her, tearing off the headset and slamming it down on a desk. 

   Feeling the sting from the harsh criticism, Max glances around at the others around her, taking note of the cold way that they are looking at her. Finally she looks over at Alec, but he doesn't meet her gaze. “Alec...”

   “No, Max.” He says quietly. “He's right. You should have waited. And you should have been willing to listen to advice from someone else, anyone else, on the team. But you didn't.” He does look up now, and she cringes at the look in his eyes. “You made it very clear that you had no intention of listening to anyone else but yourself. Because as far as you're concerned, you are the only one worth listening to; your opinion is the only one that matters.” 

   “I don't think that.” She nearly whispers, stung that he thinks she does. 

   “Yes, you do.” He answers softly. “But what do I know, hmm? I'm just the pain in your ass who botches everything up.” She flinches at the reminder of the words she'd hurled at him on Monday night. 

   Before she can say anything in response an older Transhuman female is standing between them, the back of her hand resting lightly on his brow. “Alec, sweetheart.” She hears the other woman say gently, “You look pale. Are you hurt?”

   “I'm not injured at all, Cleo. Honest.” 

   So this is the medic that he was complaining about earlier. The one with the blood tests and the lair, and who apparently calls him sweetheart! She watches in amazement as he presses his head into the woman's touch as she strokes her fingers through his hair. The movement looks almost kittenish and makes her breath catch as she suddenly remembers how Ben would lean into a comforting touch in just the same way. She blinks tears out of her eyes and looks away; it always wounds her to see Ben in Alec, to remember what she's lost.

   “You look tired.” Cleo tells Alec, “You should rest.”

   “M'fine. I've got loads to do.”

   “Do you need anything?”

   “No. Really.” Alec insists quietly.

   “Ok then, you know where I am.” She pulls a lollipop out of her pocket. “You forgot your blood test candy earlier.” 

   “Not a child.” He says. But he takes the candy all the same and Cleo chuckles as she turns away. She glares at Max as she passes her and the younger girl bristles.

   “So.” Alec says, as he shoves the lollipop in his mouth and looks up at Mole. “You gonna debrief us or what?” Mole rolls his eyes and bats at the younger man's head as he passes him. 

   “Well, Max.” Mole says with a snide look. “Are you staying for the debrief or can you not be bothered with that either?” Max clenches her fists and scowls at him. She's getting pissed off with the way the giant lizard keeps digging at her everyday. He's already made his point about the rescue mission. There's no reason to keep at her. Where does he get off? Before she knows it, they're yelling at each other.

   “For god's sake!” They're interrupted by a frustrated Alec. “Can't you two stop it for once? Or at least argue on your own damn time?” He's got both hands pressed against his temples, shoulders tight with tension. “Please.” 

   Max softens as she looks at him, he really does look pale, and tired. She's still furious with Mole, but she really doesn't want to involve anyone else. She glances sideways at Mole and sees her own sentiment reflected back at her – they'll continue this later.

   “Right.” Mole claps his hands and the team quickly returns to the hub from where they've wandered off. “Section 1 report.” He turns to a dark haired X5 and tilts his head to listen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   “I mean, it's not like I knew they had any comm units, so how was I to know that I could have waited for one?” Max paces back and forth behind Joshua. “And nobody told me that they have briefings before we rush off to rescue someone.”

   The older man sighs as he rinses his paint brush. “But Max knows about protocol.”

   “Well, yeah, but it's not like we're in the military anymore.”

   “Manticore raised us military. Even those not soldiers.” Joshua explains, and she stops to listen. “Experience says that protocol and plans are important. Information keeps people safe.” She watches as he selects another color. “When Manticore kept back intel, our people died.” He glances at her, “Manticore keeping intel from government. And now NSA are hunting us, making it easy for White to kill us.” He snarls quietly around the name of the Familiar the government has ignorantly assigned to round up the Manticore escapees. “Don't want to make it easier for him.”

   “No, no we don't.” Max agrees softly. She sits down to watch him paint. It takes a while for her to realize, but it finally sinks in that he's barely looked at her since she arrived and she frowns, wondering why.

   “Joshua?”  
   “Hmm?”  
   “Are you angry with me?”  
   “Not angry with Max.”  
   “Then...?”  
   “Joshua asked Biggs, why Max tried to apologize to Alec.”  
   “Oh.” Max winces. “You know then?”

   “Joshua knows that Little Fella said nasty things to Medium Fella at Crash. Hurtful things.”  
   “I didn't mean them.” She says, almost plaintive.  
   “Then shouldn't have said.”  
   “I know.”

   “Everyone in TC knows. Everyone mad with Max.” Joshua whines quietly. “Don't want everyone to be mad with Little Fella.”

   “I'm sorry.” She doesn't want him to be distressed because of her.  
   “Not Joshua need to apologize to.”  
   “But I told Alec I was sorry!” She exclaims, “You were there.”  
   “Bad apology.” Joshua shakes his head, stabbing the brush in his hand at his canvas. “Not sincere.”  
   “But I was.”

   “Not sound sincere. Upset Alec more. Joshua not like Alec upset, makes boy not sleep well, makes hands shake.” He whines again and Max frowns as his words raise a suspicion. He seems to know a lot about Alec.

   “How do you know that?” She's not sure if he pauses before answering or if she imagines it.

   “Alec stay with Big Fella after arrest. Max remember?” She nods and he adds, “And after Rachel died, not want to be alone.” 

   Her eyes widen at that. Alec had brushed off Max's offer of a sympathetic shoulder but he'd gone to Joshua? She feels an ache at the realization that her fellow X5 is willing to turn to the Transhuman but not to her. She's jealous that Joshua knows him well enough to know that he sleeps poorly when upset and that loss of sleep causes his hands to shake. Wait, does that mean a seizure?

   “He had a seizure?”

   “Lots of little ones.” He glances at her again. “Not bad though.” 

   “Has he had any this week?” Max asks tentatively, not really wanting to find out that she's caused Alec to seize.

   “Don't think so.” He shakes his head. “Cleo watching him now. Makes sure he's taking pills. Eating good. Sleeping.”

   “She's protective of him, huh?” Max remembers how the older woman had gently stroked his hair when she'd checked on him.

   “Yes. Cleo assigned to C Platoon, medic. Looked after Alec for years now.”

   “Assigned to...? But she's an...Anomaly?”

   “Anomalies still had to be useful to Manticore.” He says bitterly. “Even though rarely allowed off base.”

   “Oh.” Max watches as he continues to paint. It's a small canvas, quickly filling with swirls and patterns of blue and green and yellow. After a while she speaks up again. “I should go find him and apologize again, shouldn't I?”

   “Yes.” Joshua turns and gives her a gentle smile. “Max tell Alec sorry. Alec forgive.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   It takes her a little while to find him, but eventually Max finds herself leaning over the edge of a six storey apartment building watching as Alec and a couple of dozen others clear the broken and rotten furniture out of the lower levels. Her night vision means she can see him smiling and laughing, as they tell jokes and stories, bantering with each other. Nobody does that with her, nobody except Alec. The recognition of that hurts.

   Tilting her head, she attunes her hearing to what they're saying just in time to hear Alec tease one of the X4s about a mission in eastern Russia. Something about accidentally insulting a local elder with careless pronunciation that lead to the community getting him drunk and humiliating him. She shakes her head, eyes rolling. Of course, his fellows could have helped him out, but not only are they soldiers, it sounds like they were all males to boot. 

   Alec laughs loudly as the blushing X4 shoves him petulantly away. “Aww come on,” She hears him say, “You've got to admit it was funny.”

   “Fuck off.” The other man smiles reluctantly, giving Alec another shove as they head back inside the building. “You're a shit, you know that?” 

   Smiling faintly, she moves away from the edge, thinking about the things she's learned about him today and how they don't fit into the way she sees him. She never would have thought he had a temper that the others would be wary of, that Renfro would be wary of. He always seems so laid back, so easy going, so temperate. So different from her passionate brother Ben.

   “Max?”

   Whirling around she presses a hand to her chest, heart racing. Where the hell did he come from? “Alec, dammit.” He comes closer, mouth quirking. “Don't sneak up on me.”

   “I wasn't sneaking. You were just thinking too loud.” Coming to a stop, his head tilts in inquiry. “Whatchya doing up here?”

   “Looking for you.”  
   “Oh?”  
   “Yeah.”  
   “Why?”

   “I...er...I... wanted to say... to tell you...” Max shifts awkwardly from one foot to another, flushing. “I mean I...”

   “Yes?”

   “I'm sorry!” She blurts out. “I mean it. I'm really sorry. For, for what I said the other night. It wasn't true, or fair. I didn't mean it, I swear.”

   Alec looks at her for a few moments before sighing. “Ok.”

   “Ok? You believe me?” She asks hesitantly, “Only I meant it the first time but Joshua said you didn't believe me.”

   “I didn't.” 

   “Why not?” Her voice is small. He shrugs and looks away.

   “I figured you were only apologizing 'cause OC made you. Not that you actually were sorry. I mean,” He shrugs again, “You're always saying stuff like that. And you never apologized before.”

   “I'm sorry.”  
   “Are you?”  
   “Of course!”  
   “Ok. Fine. Apology accepted.” He turns away and goes to leave.

   “Wait!” Max calls out to him and he half turns back towards her. “So we're cool now?”

   “I don't know.” Alec replies after a long pause. “I don't know if I can keep accepting your vitriol every time something or someone else pisses you off.”

   “God, Alec.” Her face twists miserably. She can see in his face that he really hasn't been brushing it off like she wanted to believe he has; she hadn't wanted to accept that she's been hurting him with the things she says to him. “I'm so sorry. I don't understand why I act this way with you.”

   “Don't you?” He asks turning to face her fully, giving her a sharp look. “I do. It's because I'm not one of your unit. Not an escapee.” The look in his eyes turns bitter. “Because I'm not him, not Ben.” Max flinches at the name and his tone. “It's nothing to do with your 'list' of my sins: the baseball, or me flirting, or ruining your notes, or even the virus itself.” She looks at him, eyes wide and pained. “You're angry at Ben for begging you to kill him, but you tell yourself that he's the victim here. So you blame me instead, the man who has the temerity to be his twin. You hate me for being alive when he's dead.” He pauses and Max stares at him, horrified that he would think such things. “I'm right, aren't I?”

   “No!” She takes a desperate step towards him. “No. I don't hate you, Alec. You have to believe me! We... we're friends.” He turns his face away from her, jaw tight. “I swear, Alec, please. I don't care that you're not one of my unit, that you didn't escape. You're my friend. Yes, I wish he was still alive, that he hadn't been... broken. And yes,” Her voice catches, “You're right I am angry at him. But I know that you're as much a victim of Manticore as he was.” A tear trickles down her cheek as she moves closer, placing a hand on his arm. “I don't blame you. I don't wish you were dead. I don't hate you. Please, Alec? Please, say you believe me.”

   He looks down at her, eyes wide and wet like hers. “I want to, Max. I really do.” The look in his eyes is vulnerable and achingly young. “But, when you look at me, I think you're trying to look past my face – _his_ face – looking for him, and it makes you angry when you don't see him.”

   “That's the thing though. I don't see _his_ face, I see the face you share with him.” Max whispers, reaching up to brush one finger against his cheek. “When I look at you, look past this face, I'm trying _not_ to see him, but sometimes I do.” Her finger moves down along his jaw. “Sometimes I see the Ben I knew before he was broken. And it _hurts_ , it hurts _so much_ but I... I want it to hurt, so I don't forget him, so I don't forget what I lost when I lost him.” Cupping her hand around his face she forces him to meet her eyes. “And because I don't want to forget what I still have. I still have you, Alec. My friend, who shares Ben's bright eyes; who shines with the same kindness and sweetness. My friend who makes me smile and laugh, and knows when I need to.”

   She swipes her thumb at the tear running down his cheek. “I'm sorry I hurt you, Alec. I don't mean to. Please, say you believe me?”

   Alec's lip trembles lightly and he leans his head into her hand. “I believe you.”


	14. Penitence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
>   
> 

   A shadow passes through the night, skimming up the steps and, after a slight pause, through the door of Our Lady of the Sacred Heart.

 

   Casting his eyes around the dim interior, Ben slips his set of lock picks back into his jacket. Once he's sure that he's alone he starts to walk, cat silent, inside. His steps slow more and more as he draws closer to the alcove containing the statue of the Virgin. Eyes drawn to the serene expression on the statue's features, his heart and stomach clench at the memory of the terrible acts he'd carried out in her name.

   Falling to his knees at the foot of the statue, he stares upwards at the painted likeness that he'd turned into his own personal deity, his Blue Lady. He'd been wrong when he'd created her myths about the kind of figure she was, of the kind of hope that the misguided janitor was trying to give them in presenting them with the prayer card and words of promised protection. But how could he have known, how could any of those like him have known, when all they knew of life was combat training and weapons, military history and war tactics, experiments and tests, punishment and pain. And so, he and his unit had created a deity that made sense to them as part of their world, a warrior deity that would protect them. If they did what was required; if they achieved and believed; if they tried their best and made sacrifice. 

   However, as wrong as they'd been as children in their cold and bleak barracks, it was nothing to how wrong he'd been in the grip of his psychosis. When achievement and self sacrifice turned to the hunting and sacrifice of others. He still didn't know why his faith, something that had once given him such solace, had become so twisted and dark, even with the explanation of his illness. Maybe some of the Psy Ops operatives or psychologists that worked on him during his re-indoctrination fathomed it, but if they had, they hadn't enlightened him. Or maybe Max had been right that day in the woods, perhaps he was a Nomlie.

   He's thankful that Manticore was able fix him. It gives him a chance to redeem himself, to make it up to Max and the rest of their unit, to Alec and the rest of their blood. To think that he'd been so afraid of what Manticore would do with him if they captured him. And yes, it had been horrible and painful, but the dark imaginings of his psychosis had born no resemblance to reality in that area as in so many others.

   Early on in his illness, during those first couple of months before his mind had twisted out of control and he had turned to violence, he'd almost convinced himself more than once that he should hand himself in to Manticore. He'd known that there was something wrong with him. He'd had almost a premonition of the darkness that was to come. He'd actually started to travel to the nearest military base more than once, but each time his childhood fears of the Nomlies and the Basement had stopped him, and then it was too late. He had become caught up in his growing madness and his belief that the Blue Lady wanted blood and teeth. 

   If only he'd held on to sanity long enough to hand himself in. If he'd contacted Zack or the others, told them what he thought was happening to him and begged their help to find medical attention, or for help handing himself over. But no, he hadn't, and innocents had paid the price. His brother had paid the price.

   And now here Ben was, cowering at the base of a Christian saint, trying to prepare himself to face the brother who'd paid for his crimes. He had less than 48 hours until the deadline that Cece had given him, before she fulfilled her threatened promise to take it out of his hands and tell Alec of Ben's proximity herself. 

   Some fearful part of his mind kept berating him for coming back to Seattle after he'd fulfilled Renfro's orders and the base fell to Eyes Only. He should have stayed away. It would have been better for everyone if Alec and Max had been left to think that Ben was dead and gone. Even now it was telling him that he should leave, just tell Cece to forget it, that he was going far, far away where he could do no more damage. 

   But whatever else Ben has been, he's never been a coward. He will face his beloved Maxie, he _will_ face his precious brother. He'll face them and beg their forgiveness; he'll face them and earn this second chance he has been given.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Outside the church a slim figure stands perfectly still, barely visible against the tree that it's pressed against. With an infinitesimal sigh, it detaches itself and the moonlight illuminates the pale features of Cece as she glides up the steps of the church in the same way that Ben had done a short time before.

   Throwing a quick look over her shoulder, she presses one ear against the heavy wooden door to listen for any indication of what Ben was doing in there. She was entirely sure that this was not a place that he should be, but she had been too far behind him in her self imposed task of trailing him to prevent him entering.

   Now all that was left, was to make sure he didn't somehow manage to fuck himself up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Inside the vestry the pfft of a light bulb burning itself out and the sudden cessation of light breaks through the sleep of the priest bent over the desk, his face pressed to the ink of Sunday's half-written sermon. With a soundless groan Father Destry leavers himself upright, rubbing at his eyes. Catching sight of his face in the small mirror, he grimaces at the mess of ink and drool on his cheek. He really has to stop falling asleep at his desk like this; it's getting to be a spine punishing habit. With a sigh, he reaches for a cloth.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Back pressed against the wall of the alcove, Ben faces out into the dimness of the church, his eyes unseeing as he replays his months in re-indoctrination. Though not as nightmarish as the horrors conjured by his insane imagination, it had been every bit as painful as he'd expected, both physically and emotionally. There'd been an all too brief delay on the physical side of it while his spine had healed from his broken neck and while he'd recovered from the surgeon's careful brain surgery, but they'd soon made up for lost time.

   As bad as the beatings, the drugs, the laser burning into his brain, and physical deprivations had been, it had been the mental manipulations that had hurt the most. It had always been that way for Ben. He could stand physical pain but he struggled with emotional distress. Renfro had ordered the Psy Ops team to pull out all the stops to cause him as much distress, pain and guilt as possible.

   And it had worked, Blue Lady, had it worked.

   They showed him pictures, so many pictures. 

   Starting with pictures of the dead bodies of 206 and 211, the cloned twins of his brother Zane and sister Jondy. Though he'd had no connection to them, he'd felt grief for his siblings who would never know their doubles. Then there was the pictures of training injuries acquired by the clones and siblings of his unit, feeding into his fears for his unit's safety in the wake of Ben's dangerous and reckless actions.

   Lydecker showed him the pictures of his sister Vada, her body riddled with bullets, one square between the eyes from the Colonel's pistol. Next the pictures of Seth, who had fallen over 500ft to his death, his body shattered by the impact. Ben hadn't even known that Seth had escaped.

   Following that had come the almost unending, guilt-inducing stream of pictures taken in 2009 when so many of his fellow Transgenics underwent re-indoctrination because of his unit's escape. It had been made all the worse with the realization that some of them were his blood, other 49x clones, his _brothers_ : another X5, X5-496; over half a dozen older Xs; a half dozen or more Transhumans; and worst of all, a pair of X6s.

   Each photograph of them in re-indoctrination after Ben's escape was like a bullet to his tender heart; each bruise, each broken bone, each bleeding cut, every imagined scream and whimper like a knife-slash to his fragile psyche. He begged them to stop, screaming out to Lydecker and Renfro for it to end, but it didn't stop, it didn't end, just went on and on.

   He'd prayed for them to end, but when they did stop, he'd prayed to go back to them. If the photos had caused him pain it was nothing to what came next. Videos: high resolution, surround sound, so vivid he could almost taste and smell the pain.

   Brin, his strong and protective older sister, had handed herself into Manticore a couple of months before he'd been captured. She'd been direly ill, close to death, and desperate to survive. They'd used her ailing strength to break her, her re-indoctrination shortened by the swiftness of its process, but no less brutal. He'd been saddened and angry to know that she was back in Manticore – and he'd been punished for it: Manticore was where she belonged, where he belonged, where they all belonged. 

   They had showed him the re-indoctrination of his little brother Kavi. When they'd brought him in he'd been badly injured; he'd fought the Manticore retrieval team so hard he'd almost died for it. Lydecker had told him that Kavi had stupidly given himself away playing baseball. It seemed that even after ten years the old man had held some twisted version of caring and pride in the unit he'd hand picked and had overseen, his disappointment in Kavi's foolishness ripe in the tone of his voice. The disappointment in his eyes when he'd looked at Ben was as strong and had twisted Ben's stomach just as it had when he was a child.

   The torment of the videos and pictures had ceased briefly when they let him see Brin and Kavi, to see them back in training and firmly loyal to Manticore. Then they showed the three of them what had become of Zack. His poor brother, hooked up to machines and drugged out of his mind as they'd taken his organs and replaced them with experimental synthetics. It was a shocking way to see someone who had been so strong, who had dedicated himself for two decades to protecting his younger unit mates, first inside Manticore and then on the Outside. A shock and a warning.

   The final piece of his torment was saved, of course, until last. They told him he had a twin. Not a clone, not a sibling, but a real, natural twin. A strong shining brother. X5RE-494, Alexander. A brother who was at the top of the Transgenic hierarchy, highly ranked; Elite. Who for all his brilliance and excellence, had suffered terribly at the hands of Manticore, whose suffering could in large part be blamed on Ben. 

   Not only had his twin suffered re-indoctrination at the age of nine, but at the age of 18, fresh out of a second in depth re-indoctrination for failing a mission (for refusing to kill an innocent, for being so much better than Ben), he'd been dragged back into Psy Ops due to the beginning of Ben's murderous rampage. As he remembers the reports, the glossy photographs, the vivid videos of his brother's 'testing', he can't help the cry of distress that escapes his mouth. The piteous sound echoes around the church followed by loud, racking sobs.


	15. Forgiveness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
>   
> 

   _As he remembers the reports, the glossy photographs, the vivid videos of his brother's 'testing', he can't help the cry of distress that escapes his mouth. The piteous sound echoes around the church followed by loud, racking sobs._

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   As the cry reaches Cece's ears through the door, she immediately pulls out her lock picks. At the sound of the younger man's sobs, she nearly breaks the mechanism, snarling soundlessly in frustration. Moments later she slips through the door, barely remembering to catch and shut it quietly behind her. She makes her way swiftly inside before coming to a sudden, narrow-eyed halt. As she spots the priest approaching the distressed Transgenic, she makes no attempt to stop her quiet growl of protectiveness.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Father Destry closes and locks the door of the vestry, intending to leave for the night when a broken cry shatters the quietness of his church. His heart clenches at the sheer pain in that one short sound and he quickly makes his way forward, searching out the source. He spots a huddled, sobbing form at the feet of the Blessed Mother and moves towards it.

   Close enough to see, he takes in the moonlit face of a young man, the features immediately and irrevocably familiar. For a moment he's in memory, seeing that same young face looming menacingly above him. But he quickly shakes free of that horrific moment: he's alive, he's safe, and that tortured, insane boy who came close to killing him is dead. So this, this cannot be him.

   “My Child?” He says quietly, approaching him carefully, “What is it?” His query is met by a wide eyed stare, young and frightened, before the man flinches away like a scared animal, arms raised protectively as he skitters along the wall away from him.

 

   Shocked out of his weeping, Ben's stares from between his forearms in pained disbelief. Even in the dimness of the church he can see the older man's features clear as day, it's the man that Max stopped him from killing. “Father Destry.” He chokes out the man's name and sees the surprise on his face. “I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come here. I'm sorry.” He trembles for a few seconds before falling forward onto both hands, head lowered in supplication, making himself small and unthreatening. “I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I don't know why, I was wrong, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.” His babbling trails off into whimpers.

 

   Retreating, his heart pounding in fear, the priest looks on with sick realization. The girl had been wrong, or she'd lied; he's not dead. His eyes flicker to the statue of Mary and then back to the man before him. It is him. It is the man who tried to kill him, to sacrifice him to some twisted version of the Saint. “Ben?” He asks, fright strangling him. He gets another look at wide eyes in a pale face before they flood with tears and the man starts to weep again, babbling more apologies. He's frozen in fear for only a few moments before he finds himself pushed violently aside; his heart leaps in terror as he stumbles against a pew and it takes far too long for him to realize he's still alive.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   It hasn't taken long for Cece to get the gist of what is going on and to decide that she's had enough. She barrels forward, shoving the human aside to get to Ben's cringing form. She falls to her knees beside him and pulls him into her lap, “Ben? Ben, it's ok, come on.” She starts to rock the younger man in her arms, “Come on, it's ok.”

   “It's not!” He cries, face pressed to her arm, “I'm a Freak, they should have let me die!”  
   “You're not.”  
   “I am!” He shudders, “I belong in the Basement with the rest of the Nomlies.”  
   “You're not a Nomlie.” She tells him fiercely.  
   “I'm a psycho, like the X2s. They should have put me down too.”  
   “No.”

   “Yes,” He trembles against her, “They should have let me die. Max was right to kill me, when she told me what I am.” He shudders again, “I'm a Basement Nomlie.” Cece's eyes widen in shock as she puts the pieces together: Max had confronted Ben and instead of getting him help, called him a Nomlie, told him he belonged in the Basement, 'killed' him and then left his not-quite-dead-enough body for Manticore. And she'd told Alec at least some of it.

 

   Slumped down on the nearest pew, Father Destry watches in silent disbelief. Max hadn't been lying to him after all. But when she'd assured him that Ben was dead she certainly hadn't mentioned that she'd killed him herself. And as if that wasn't awful enough somebody – he can only assume it was Manticore, the place Max had told him had created, abused and tortured them – had somehow revived him. How? Why?

 

   Growling quietly, Cece shifts them until she can take hold of Ben's face with both hands, forcing him to look her in the eyes as she speaks slowly and clearly, “You are not a Nomlie. You are not a Freak.” He shakes his head and his tears cease as he tries to deny her words. “You do not belong in the Basement. Listen to me.” She moves her hands to his shoulders and shakes him lightly, “You had a brain tumor. It was not your fault.”

   “It was! It was!”  
   “No, it wasn't.” She shakes him again, “You are not a Nomlie.”  
   “But I...”

   “But nothing. You are not a psycho.” She tells him, her eyes fierce on his, “You had a brain tumor and a psychotic break because of it. You had surgery and treatment and Psy Ops. There is nothing wrong with you.” She cups his chin. “You say it.” 

   “I had a brain tumor and a psychotic break because of it.” His voice trembles as he repeats her words. “I had surgery and treatment and s... psy... Psy Ops. There is n-nothing wrong with me.”

   “That's right.” She nods and almost croons. “There's nothing wrong with you, you're ok now.”

 

   Observing them, Destry tries to make sense of what he is hearing. Some of it makes sense: brain tumor, psychotic break, treatment. But he has no idea what Psy Ops is, but from the things Max had told him about her shared childhood with Ben, he has a feeling that it isn't good. His train of thought is broken when he realizes that the young woman is watching him. She's holding Ben to her, rocking him slightly, murmuring comforting words as her hand strokes gently up and down his spine. Her actions are gentle and soothing, in complete contrast to the cold, hard way she is looking over Ben's head at him. He meets her eyes, and he feels himself shiver as she lifts the corner of her mouth and snarls quietly at him. Snarls! She actually snarls like an animal and he feels a tense jolt of fear down his spine.

   While Max had told him plenty about how she and her siblings - her what did she call it? her unit? - had been raised, she'd largely glossed over what it was that made them technically different, giving only the barest hints. He's learned more from the news these last few months, once he'd realized that the Manticore that she had told him about must be the same Manticore revealed by Eyes Only and that was now being damned by the government and press. Genetically engineered beings with animal DNA. Max was one, Ben was one, and it was clear to him that this other young woman was one.

   Carefully, he raises his hands, empty palms outwards in what he hopes will be registered as a peaceful pose. Not peaceful enough, clearly, as the woman relinquishes her hold on Ben in order to place herself between them, as if she needs to protect Ben from Destry himself.

 

   “What do you know? How did you know his name?” Cece demands, crouched defensively in front of Ben. “Who sent you? Manticore?” She bares her teeth threateningly, “NSA? The Familiars?” She moves half a step forward, still crouching, her body coiled to leap. “Who are you?” 

   “It's ok.” Ben lightly rests his hand on her back as he moves into a matching crouch behind her. “Cece, it's ok.” When he goes to stand, the older Transgenic reaches back to grab his wrist, pulling him back down to the floor behind her.

   “Stay down.”

   Not wanting to rile her up more than she already is, Ben does as he's told as he tries to diffuse the situation. “He's just a priest.”

   “He's human.”  
   “That doesn't mean he's a threat.”  
   “It means that he can't be trusted.”  
   “Not all humans are bad.” 

   Cece snorts quietly at that, then growls warningly as the priest leans towards them. “Stay back.”

   “I'm not going to hurt you.” The dark haired man bares his empty palms towards them again. “I swear. Neither of you. My name is Father Destry and Ben's right, I'm no threat to you.” 

   Reminded that he hasn't yet had chance to answer her questions, she repeats “How did you know his name?”

   “His sister, Max told me.”

   “I should have fricken' known. What else did she tell you?” 

   “She explained enough about your lives at Manticore for me to understand why what happened to me, happened.” Destry answers quietly, his eyes meeting Ben's guilt-ridden gaze where the younger man is peaking around the woman's side. She immediately moves to block his line of sight.

   “Understand?” She snorts, “She doesn't know or understand jack. How the hell she thinks she can explain anything to anyone I don't understand. Stupid O'niner bitch.” 

   “Cece!”  
   “What?” She snarls.  
   “I'm an 09er too.” Ben points out. “And she's not stupid.”

   “You're different.” Cece answers him without turning around. “And I've yet to see any indication that she's any different from the mass of cowardly Ordinaries she's so desperate to be one of.” 

   “She's my sister.” 

   “So fuckin' what? Have you heard the way the bitch speaks to the rest of us? To your actual brother?” When he just shuffles awkwardly behind her without answering she continues, “Exactly. Traitorous bitch deserves a good kicking.”

   Ben sighs and rubs a hand over his brow. What can he say to defend Max's actions? She's done very little to endear herself to the other Transgenics and quite a bit to piss them off. “Can I stand up now?”

   “No.”

   “Cece.” He whines out her name. “Come on. One human is no threat to us.”

   “Stop whining.” Her narrowed eyes are still fixed on the priest where he's watching them in clear fascination. “Stop staring at us like we belong in a Zoo.” She tells him pointedly.

   “I'm sorry.” He apologises, being careful to direct his words at the young woman in front of him and not the the man behind her. “I didn't mean to give that impression. It's just... he seems to be so different than... before.”

   “Well, of course he is.” She answers with a sneer. “You were listening. Did you not hear the bit about his tumor?”

   “I did yes, but I'm afraid I don't understand why that makes a difference.” 

   “Brain tumors and traumatic brain injuries can cause hallucinations, delusions and psychosis.” Cece explains shortly.

   “And Psy Ops can do wonders for repairing and the rewiring the brain.” Ben adds, “They really go above and beyond in their thoroughness.” He continues bitterly.

   “Psy Ops?”

   “Psychological Operations. Largely responsible for psychological warfare and manipulation as part of Manticore's military remit.” Cece's tone is curt, her face pinched. “Internally, they were wholly responsible for psychological studies, attitude adjustment, memory manipulation, re-indoctrination and reprogramming.” At Destry's confused look she adds. “Short explanation? Brainwashing.” The confused look morphs into an appalled one.

   “I see.” Is his faint reply. 

   “Do you? Well that's very nice for you.” Cece snaps, flowing to her feet and dragging Ben up beside her. “We're going.” 

   Ben huffs as she pulls him sideways, keeping him behind her as she moves them warily away from the human. “Wait, Cece, gimme a sec.” He forces her to stop and moves out from behind her, ignoring her sound of annoyance. “Father, I...” He turns hesitantly to address the priest. “I don't know why I... did those things, and I'm sure it makes no difference, but I... I'm sorry I... hurt... you.”

   “I forgive you.” The older man says quietly. Ben's mouth drops open for a moment.  
   “But... but you can't.”  
   “Can't I?”  
   “Of course not, I tried to kill you!”  
   “And I forgive you for it.”  
   “You were scared of me when you realized it was me.” Ben argues.

   “Yes, I was. But I'm not now.” He smiles and tries to joke, “Your friend on the other hand...” When the joke falls flat, he sighs, “I forgive you Ben.” He sees the look of confusion on Ben's face and sighs again. “Truly, sincerely, I do.”

   “But...” Ben's eyes are wide and wet as he stares at him.

   “I forgive you child. And so does the Lady.”


	16. Logan & Alec

 

   “Dammit.” Logan sighs as he hangs up the phone. “Where are you?” Max isn't answering her cell or responding to the messages on her pager. He really needs to get in touch with her.

   Pushing away from the desk, he scrubs a hand through his hair. One of his contacts from the Informant Net has some information for him on the latest Eyes Only project that he's working on and he really needs it as soon as possible. But he can't get there himself, which is why he needs Max to meet with his contact.

   He really wants to get this project finished, not only because of the time factor with the information that will bring down a corrupt judge that he's been chasing for three years now, but because it's been a few weeks since he sent out an EO hack that isn't related to either Manticore or the SW1. Not that it isn't satisfying helping Max or the SW1, but it isn't quite the same as his own EO work.

   Plus, he's pretty much stalled on the Manticore front. He hadn't been able to get anything new on them even before White's goons trashed the state of the art equipment at his apartment. And now that he's working at Sandeman's house with salvaged and scavenged equipment? Well, let's just say things are slow going, not to mention risky. It's only thanks to the fact that Max persuaded Dix and Luke to route his hacks through their equipment in TC that he can still safely go ahead with them without being traced.

   Taking a sip of his cold coffee, he grimaces and reaches for the phone again. Max's cell rings out and he doesn't see any point in leaving a fifth message on her pager. He pushes his glasses up to rub at his eyes in frustration. There's nothing for it, he really needs that information and there's only one other option. He dials another number.

   “What's up Logie?” A cheerful voice answers his call and his face pinches in annoyance.

   “Alec. I need you to meet with a contact this morning.” Straight to the point, he really doesn't want to waste time exchanging pleasantries. “He works at the courthouse.”

   There's a pause before Alec responds. “Does it have to be this morning? Only I'm working a double ...”

   “Yes it does.” Logan interrupts, before continuing a little dismissively. “Look, we both know that you blow or pass off your Jam Pony runs for the smallest reason. Well this time you can do it for something important.”

 

   **Leaning against a rusty fence outside what used to be a city park and is now some sort of makeshift camp, Alec clenches his fist and jaw in irritation.**

**“Actually Logan, I don't.” He hears Logan snort in disbelief. “The only black marks on my record are from the day I asked Josh to cover me for several deliveries. Deliveries that I shouldn't have been making since I'd just finished my morning shift. And most of which I ended up having to search out where he'd left them and deliver myself after my afternoon shift.”**

**“Well I'm sorry you had to do some extra work.” His lips thin at Logan's patronizing voice on the other end of the call, “But I still don't know what the hell you were thinking making Joshua do those deliveries. It's not like you couldn't have done them between your shifts instead of whatever shady deal you skipped out for.”**

**“I was thinking,” Alec snaps, “That I needed the two grand to buy my meds. That's what I was thinking.” He continues, voice sharp, “Or maybe you think a major seizure is just the thing to bring the happy-go-lucky sociopath down a peg or two?”**

 

   “Oh.” Great, now Logan feels like a shit. And he still needs Alec to meet his contact. “I didn't...”

   “You didn't know?” He hears Alec's voice take on a mocking lilt. “Well of course not, that would require asking rather than assuming now wouldn't it?”

   “You're right.” The older man grimaces, “I shouldn't have assumed.”

   “No, you shouldn't.” Alec answers quietly. “Look, what is it you want? I have a double shift's worth of work to get through today, not to mention the rest of the crap I have to do.”

   “My contact has some documents for me, I need them collected.” Logan hesitates before saying, “I really need them today, I can't leave my computer and I can't get through to Max.”

   “And since there's no one else, I guess you decided to go with the last resort.” There's nothing Logan can say to that, as it's completely true. But he knows how it must seem to the younger man.

 

   **Alec snorts at the lack of response. “And it has to be this morning?”**

**“Yes.”**  
**“Fine.”**  
**“Thank you.”**

**“Whatever.” The X5 huffs in irritation as he glances at the sky, scowling at the approaching rain clouds. “Right, so. Details?”**

 

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

**Two hours later, Alec chains his bike outside the courthouse and bounds up the steps. Entering the once imposing building he ambles over to the security station and pulls his lanyard from around his neck, handing his pass over to the burly guard with an innocuous smile. “Jam Pony Messenger. Here to collect a package from... umm...” He pauses and pretends to read the details from his clipboard. “Mr Johnson in Records?”**

**The guard hands his pass back and checks his own clipboard. “Right, yes.” Looking up, he gestures Alec through the arch of the body scanner and motions one of his colleagues over. “Wright here, will go with you to meet Mr Johnson. I'll let him know you're here.”**

**“'kay.” Alec lets the other guard lead him, pretending to gawk at the worn grandeur of the public areas. He's a little surprised when they don't stop at the security locked doors but move deeper into the building and towards the archives. He starts to prattle to the guard as he discreetly takes in the laughable security measures. And it's a good job he did, as he's able to use inane chatter to cover the twitchiness of Logan's contact once they reach him. Honestly, amateurs.**

**He's glad to make his way out of the building a short time later before the silly little man managed to give the game away. Unchaining and climbing onto his bike he quickly makes his way to the place he stashed his weapons before calling Logan to confirm the pick up.**

**“Yeah, I got it. I'm just gonna open it up and separate your stuff from the genuine delivery.” He rolls his eyes at Logan's questions. “Of course it went ok, your guy was a bit twitchy but the security guy didn't have a clue. Yeah, yeah. I'll drop it by during my lunch break. In about 40 minutes. See ya.” He hangs up and puts his cell away, muttering, “Anybody'd think I wasn't a highly trained and experienced operative.” Cece's right, Logan is a patronizing ass, and Alec has no idea why he keeps trying at friendship with the older man. He obviously has a low opinion of him, though whether it's quite as low as Max's opinion he doesn't know. Fuck, why does he bother with them again?**

 

   After Alec's confirmation of the pick up Logan returns to his other cases. Though just as it was that morning, it's such simple work that it offers no distraction from his thoughts and worries. The same thoughts and worries that have been plaguing him all week, and the last few weeks before that.

   What exactly is the state of the relationship between Max and Alec?

   He's watched the friendship develop between them over the months since Manticore fell. He's seen the way Max's automatic trust of Alec has slowly strengthened the more contact they have had with each other; and the more Alec has helped out, first in rescuing other Transgenics and then on Eyes Only missions.

   Like Logan, Max had started out trusting in Alec's skills and later come to trust in him personally. She'd gone from barely tolerating his presence, furious at his attempts to embed himself in her life to grudging acceptance and then reliance on him and his support.

   As far as Logan had been aware, their friendship was still tentative and complicated, with Max slow to allow Alec close and Alec slow to trust Max. To suddenly be faced with the fact that their relationship had turned sexual was a shock. Max has always given the impression of being rather strait-laced when it comes to that kind of thing, and where Alec certainly isn't celibate he hadn't given the impression of someone interested in anything other than casual sex.

   If Logan were to be truthful with himself, it's not even the sex that bothers him. It's the idea of them being intimate, of having the kind of relationship that's filled with gentle affection and shared smiles. Just the kind of thing he'd seen that morning he'd stumbled upon Alec leaving Max's apartment, Alec's arm around her neck as Max stood tucked into his side. That was what had hurt, seeing Max comfortable so close to Alec when she'd never seemed that easy with Logan.

   While he's being truthful, he's also a little hurt that Alec had thought so little of him that he was happy to move in on his girl while Logan was distracted, he'd thought Alec a better man than that. And it's that sense of being let down that has allowed Logan to think so uncharitably of Alec lately, and to take such satisfaction in the way Max treated him on Monday night.

   The way she'd acted had surprised Logan. Sure, Max had bitched out Alec plenty of times, often tossed out a spiteful line or two, but she'd never been so downright nasty to him. He'd been pleased to see her glaring and nearly snarling at the male X5, but when she'd laid into him verbally, even Logan had had to wince and look away in discomfort.

   It raised some uncomfortable questions for Logan about Max. He'd never seen her act like that, never dreamed she could, it had seemed so at odds with the girl he knows she is. He would not have expected her to be so cruel to anyone, let alone someone she cares for, the way she claims to care for Alec. Unless she was lying about her and Alec, but why would she do that? Why let him believe that they'd betrayed him like that? No, she can't have been lying, she wouldn't lie to him, not Max.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Twelve thirty finds Logan checking his watch once again just before he hears the front door open and Alec chime out. “Jam Pony Messenger! Special Delivery!” He comes into the room pulling off his cycling gloves. “I have your stolen documents Mr Eyes Only, Sir.”

   The older man rolls his eyes, holding out his hand as Alec hands the packet over. “Any problems?”

   “Nope. Did your contact get back to you after?”

   “Yeah, he said that it went without a hitch from his end. Nobody questioned the use of a new delivery service. Or the fact that the package you collected was bigger than it really should have been.”

   “Cool.” Alec nods, “Not really surprised though, the security is crap considering the kind of records they have. Max or I could have got in any night you wanted and copied a months worth of stuff, or more, in one go.”

   “Good to know.” Logan pulls the documents from the packet and flicks quickly through them before putting them down on the desk and looking up at Alec where he's eyeing the the mishmash of parts that make up the hacking set up. “We could use the same method again for other contacts as well.”

   “Hmm?” Alec looks back at him with a look of surprise. “Oh, um, sure.”

   “It was a good idea. Hiding the transfer of information under a genuine messenger pick up and delivery. I'm glad you came up with it.” Alec shrugs and ducks his head. “You did good.” Logan tells him quietly, watching in amazement as Alec's cheeks turn pink. Was he so unused to praise that so few words could affect him? What was he saying, Alec grew up in Manticore, he doubted positive reinforcement of any kind was part of his life.

 

  **“Hungry? I've got some leftovers in the freezer I can warm up.”**

**The question takes Alec by surprise for the second time in five minutes. Was he asking to be polite or did he mean it? He looks up at the older man who has been so cold and distant to him lately, even more than usual, and sees genuine inquiry. He shrugs, “Sure, I could eat.”**

**“I know that,” Is the wry answer, “You're an X5. You can always eat. I meant are you actually hungry? Or have you eaten?”**

**“I haven't eaten yet, no.” The question of whether he's hungry is answered when his stomach rumbles loudly.**

**“I'll take that as a, 'Yes Logan, feed me', shall I?” Logan looks at him in amusement and Alec can feel himself blush again. “Come on.” The other man says, as he pushes away from his desk and stands. “I've got few things you can choose from.”**


	17. Alec & Logan

 

_“I'll take that as a, 'Yes Logan, feed me', shall I?” The other man looks at him in amusement and he can feel himself blush again. “Come on.” Logan says as he pushes away from his desk and stands. “I've got few things you can choose from.”_

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Watching Alec digging into the double serving of reheated bolognese, Logan has to smile at the hum of appreciation from the younger man and feels a sense of culinary satisfaction at the speed the food seems to be disappearing. He pulls a carton of milk out of the fridge and unscrews the lid to take a sniff. Determining that it smells ok, he pours a large glass and places it in front of Alec.**

**“Thanks.”**  
**“You're welcome.”**

**Taking a seat across the rickety table, Logan takes a bite of his sandwich. He looks up when he notices that Alec has stopped eating. “You're sure you don't want any?” Alec asks him.**

**“No, I'm good.” He answers with slight shake of his head. There's a few minutes of awkward silence before Logan breaks it with the obvious question of, “So, how are things in TC?”**

**“Fine mostly.” Alec shrugs. “Would be better if Max and Mole could be in the same room for more than 15 minutes without having a blazing row, but you know,” Another shrug, “You can't have everything.”**

**“They're still not getting on then?”**

**“God, no.” The X5 quirks a weak smile. “Though they did come to a silent understanding yesterday to postpone most of their argument until after I'd left. Nice to know that they can come to an agreement sometimes, even if it's only to save me a headache.”**

**“Well, it's a start.”**

**“I suppose. ” Alec sighs, “Though considering Mole's not that keen on Xs and Max's not that keen on the whole inveterate soldier identity, I don't hold out much hope.”**

**“And how are Luke and Dix?” Logan doesn't know many of the Transhumans, or even X Series, by name, but those two he not only knows but has spoken to a few times.**

 

   “They're good. Of course, Dix is always good. He's terminally nice – drives Mole up the wall sometimes. But I think it's good to have someone around who's so positive all the time.” Alec pauses for a drink of milk. “Mole blames it on Dix being an X who never had to go out on maneuvers.”

   “Dix is an X Series?” Logan questions, sounding astonished.

   “Yeah, Luke too.” Alec tilts his head in inquiry, “Why? What did you think he was?”

   “I thought they were Transhumans.” The older man replies. Alec is startled at Logan's reaction, surely he didn't think that all the Anomalies came from the ranks of the Transhumans?

   “Nah, they're X3 Anomalies so they didn't get out of the basement much. Since the Anomalies were all lumped together in the basement, I guess they don't really think of themselves as Xs or Transhumans.” Alec stops to think for a moment. “At least I think that's the case. I guess you'd have to ask them.”

   “I don't think they'd feel comfortable with me asking them. Neither would I for that matter.” Logan says. He's probably right. Dix and Luke may not mind dealing with Logan, but that doesn't mean they'd feel comfortable with personal questions. And truthfully, Alec probably wouldn't feel comfortable with them answering that kind of question from Logan anyway.

   Scooping the last of the bolognese onto a spoon, Alec sticks it in his mouth and takes a moment to enjoy the taste before he swallows it down with an appreciative sound. Wiping his mouth he reaches into his pocket for his vials of medication, taking one dose from each and knocking them back with the last of his milk.

 

   **Logan watches Alec take his meds with a frown. The tablets are obviously tryptophan but, “What's in the capsules?” He sees Alec raise one eyebrow at the question before answering.**

**“Taurine. It's a type of sulfonic acid. Some of us X5s take supplemental doses to help prevent seizures.”**

**“I see.” He's never heard Max mention it. As far as he knows she only takes tryptophan. Thoughtfully, he watches the younger man climb to his feet and stretch, before removing his gloves from his pocket.**

**“I'd best get back to work” Alec tells him as he pulls the first cycling glove on. “Thanks for the food.”**

**“You're welcome. Thanks again for the pick up.”**

**Alec just smiles and waves his hand slightly. “S'fine. Did you want me to tell Max anything?”**

**“Just tell her why I was trying to contact her and that it's dealt with.”**

**“'kay.” Alec smiles again before bounding from the room, “I'll see you around Logie.” Logan sighs at the annoying nickname that the X5 seems to have labeled him with.**

**“Bye Alec.”**

 

   Leaving Sandeman's old place, Alec quickly cycles back to Jam Pony and another boring shift delivering packages around the mostly dirty and depressing environs of Seattle. He only has time to wave at his friends before Normal spots him and he soon finds his bag filled with packages and a list of collections to bring back in for sorting. Great. Well at least he's got a full stomach.

   It was a pleasant surprise when Logan offered him lunch. It's been a good while since the older man offered him much in the way of hospitality, not since before his last trip to the hospital and Alec's night with Seattle PD. He still isn't sure what happened to their tentative friendship. Logan can't blame him for being wrongly arrested just when he needed Alec's blood, surely?

   Then again, you never know. If Max can catch self-righteousness from the Ordinary, why can't said Ordinary catch irrational thinking from Max?

   As he winds his way through a short cut, Alec finds his thoughts drifting inevitably from Logan to Max. She'd surprised him too, when she'd apologized to him again the night before. He still thinks it's because of Original Cindy reading her the riot act, but her second apology had seemed sincere at least.

   Whether that apology will lead on to anything, he'll have to wait and see. Maybe she'll be nicer to him for a couple of weeks. He'll be genuinely surprised if any better treatment lasts any longer than that. It never has before.

   He plays back the conversation between Clara, Biggs, Debbie and himself from earlier in the week remembering how riled they'd all been on his behalf – it was kinda sweet, but unnecessary. He's perfectly capable of getting annoyed all on his own, as he'd shown at Crash. He's still a little embarrassed by his loss of control among a crowd of Ordinaries.

   _"You wouldn't put up with it from anyone else."_  
   He remembers Debbie's words and his own reply.  
   _"True, I wouldn't. I guess, I think I'm testing her. I want to see how long it takes her to wise up to things both where I'm concerned and with the rest of us."_

   Is he really testing her? Why? And what happens if, like Biggs had suggested, she doesn't pass?

   He knows that he can deal with whatever Max dishes out to him well enough. He's more worried about how her actions are affecting her reputation in Terminal City. He hadn't realized how negatively the others have been feeling towards her – a gross oversight on his part, he's supposed to be X Series Commander. How could he have missed how bad things are for and because of her?

   He dreads to think what will happen if anyone finds out that it was Max and not Logan who sent the hack that brought Manticore's existence to public attention. God knows what they'll do to her then. Oh, they won't kill her or cripple her, nothing like that - it's not the Transgenic way. But whatever they'd do it would be dire for her, and it would break Joshua's heart. Joshua's been hurt enough.

   He really has no idea why Max is the way she is, it can't be because she's an escapee. Kavi didn't act the way she has been – but then, he wasn't out in the world half as long. On the other hand, Brin was only recaptured six months before Max, and she hasn't shown the same superiority complex around the other Xs.

   Then there was Zack. Once he'd started to regain a few of his memories, he'd treated Alec like an equal, not like an inferior specimen. Though of course, that may be down to Zack having known Alec as a cub. Assuming of course, Psy Ops didn't wipe those memories. But even then, his instincts had probably made him more comfortable with Alec's presence.

   As Alec's mind meanders through the memories of his and Zack's interactions as part of Doctor Sandeman's focus group of X5s, he frowns as he experiences one of those odd flashes of pain that he usually does when he remembers those times. He wavers on his bike for a second or two as another particularly strong flash of pain lances through his head along with a sense of loss, of something missing.

   He comes to a juddering halt, one hand coming out to brace himself against a wall, gasping as something clarifies in his mind. The flashes of pain and sense of loss – was this another result of Psy Ops tampering with his head? Was there something they'd removed from or locked away in his memories?

   Wait, wait. Alec's heartbeat rises with his gorge, and his eyes swim. Had he and 493 actually known each other? Had they made he and Ben forget spending their early years together?  
   Is that why Ben had... because of Alec?  
   Oh god, was Max right? Had Manticore broken him?


	18. Original Cindy

   Humming, Cindy steps out of the shower and reaches for a couple of towels. Wrapping one around her hair and the other around her body, she swipes at the steam coating the tiny, cracked mirror and takes in her appearance. “Girl, you's one fine mama.” She tells herself with a smile. “Them lickety's are gonna be throwin' themselves at ya tonight.” She gives herself a saucy wink before opening the bathroom door.

   “Of course they are.” A warm voice says just as she smacks into the hard chest blocking the doorway. She squeals, instinctually raises one hand to deliver a slap to the cheeky face grinning down at her and then scrambles to hold onto her towel. “Aww. I was hoping to make you drop it.” Alec ducks away from a second slap.

   “Dammit, Pretty Boy.” She pushes him away from her, “Get away before I slap you silly.”

   “But... you's such a fine mama.” He smirks, imitating her accent. “It's just so hard not to throw myself at you.”

   “Just you try throwing anything _hard_ a' yours at OC and she'll cut it off.” She threatens, jabbing a finger towards his crotch and glaring when he pouts at her.

   “You wouldn't do that to me, would you? Just think of all those poor people you'd be depriving.”

   “You's such a dog.”

   “Wolf, actually.” He grins toothily. OC rolls her eyes and pushes him out of the way to get to her bedroom.

   When she returns, well covered in her bathrobe, she finds him kneeling on the couch, arms crossed on the back, head resting on his arms, and big eyes staring mournfully at her. She feels her irritation draining away and tries desperately to hold on to it. “Oh no mister, ya can stop giving me dem eyes, you's not getting 'round OC that easily.”

   “But I've got you a present!” 

   “Oh?”

   “Yes. See?” He triumphantly holds up a large plastic bottle and offers it to her. 

   She takes it and is pleased to see it's the body lotion she asked him to look out for, “How'd you get a bottle this size?”

   “I had something the guy wanted.” He shrugs and returns his chin to the top of his folded arms. “So, am I forgiven?”

   “I suppose.”

   “Do I get a kiss?” He sulks playfully when she simply kisses one finger tip and presses it to the tip of his nose. “Is that all?”

   “Don't push it.”

   “What do I get for two bottles?” He asks, lifting another bottle from the seat beside him. When she kisses two fingers and presses them to his cheek, he grins impishly, and points at the counter behind her. “Look.” Cindy turns to see a cardboard box. Looking inside she finds another 4 bottles and squeals happily. She puts down the two in her hands and turns back to Alec. 

   “It's what you wanted then?” He asks.

   Stepping back to the couch she presses a kiss to his forehead and smiles at him. “Yes, it's what I wanted.”

   “Ya gonna wear some tonight?”

   “Probably.”

   “Can I watch you put it on?” He waggles his eyebrows and she snorts, smacking him lightly round the back of the head.

   “Behave.”

   “Where's the fun in that?”

   “It's in not getting yo cheeky self a lecture from Original that lasts so long that her girl Max gets home before she finishes and yo end up with another one from her.”

   “I see your point.”  
   “Thought you might.”  
   “Spoilsport.”  
   “Uh huh.”

   “So.” Alec stands and stretches. “I shall leave you to the mysteries of your feminine ablutions, that you won't let me watch, and head home for my own shower.” As he moves around the sofa, Cindy puts one hand on his chest. 

   “Now hold on Hot Boy. Cindy wants to talk to you.”

   “About what?” He halts and tilts his head questioningly.

   “You know what.”

   “I do?” He asks with an appearance of puzzlement.

   “Of course you do. It's why you've been avoiding OC all week.”

   “Avoiding you? Now why would you think I'd do something so foolish?” He grins widely, but Cindy notices that he doesn't quite meet her eyes. 

   “Because you don't want to talk about some of the things that happened on Monday.” The older woman tells him pointedly. Alec sighs.

   “Trust me OC, I've had plenty of talking about the things that happened on Monday.”

   “Not wit' me you haven't.” She puts her hand back on his chest and nudges him back to his seat. “Now sit yo ass down.” She watches him drop into his seat and cross his arms with another put upon sigh. 

   Taking a seat beside him, she turns to look at him. The petulant look on his face makes him look like a kid, but then he's only what? Twenty or twenty one? And in many ways, he still is a kid. 

   “So...” Alec looks at her out of the corner of his eye but stays quiet as she speaks. “Where shall we start?” She raises an eyebrow as he just shrugs at her. “How about... Clara?” 

   The younger man gives her a wary look, “What about Clara?”

   “Clara McDowell.” Cindy states the name slowly. “You told Max that because of her age she'd have to go into Jam Pony as somebody's younger sister, yeah?” Alec just makes a non-committal sound. “Which doesn't explain why she had to go in as _your_ sister. Unless, of course,” She pauses and he gives her a blank look, “She actually _is_ your sister.” His face remains blank, and the look in his eyes now matches it before he looks away. “And by sister, I don't mean in the way that Max means Zack is her brother. I'm right aren't I? You and Clara are siblings. Genetically and emotionally.”

   It takes Alec a few minutes before he reluctantly nods his head. “You're right, we are.”

   “So why didn't you tell Max that?”

   “Why do you think?” Alec answers sharply, “I won't have her treating my sister like dirt just because she's _my_ sister.”

   “She wouldn't...” OC begins to defend her best friend.

   “Wouldn't she?” Alec rises abruptly from the sofa to stride across the room to the window. He stares out of it for a moment before turning back to OC. “You were there when she heard one of the others refer to X5R-600 and how he was 599's double. You heard her reaction to the idea that Zack was one of a pair.” He clenches both his fists and jaw for a moment, before closing his eyes and taking a deep, and what is clearly meant to be a calming, breath. “And you've seen the way she treats me.” 

   “You?”

   “Me. What, you think she treats me like crap just because I irritate her? Because I made a few mistakes?” He snorts, “It's because of 493.”

   “Her brother.” She sees Alec flinch slightly at her words, his mouth opening for a second before snapping shut. It must be weird to hear his brother/clone referred to Max's as brother when he and Max have anything but a sibling relationship.

   Her mind casts back to the conversation he'd referred to, and how angry Max had been, how she'd made comments which had astounded Cindy considering Max hadn't been anywhere near as bothered by the thought, and reality, of her own clone. Even when she'd heard that 600 was dead, Max had continued to be derogatory. It had caused a wave of anger among the other Transgenics and she'd seen a few of them grab at others to stop them from going for Max.

   Cindy frowns as she watches Alec, she hadn't realized at the time, but his reaction now tells her that something about Max insulting Zack's clone bothers him for more than the obvious reasons.

   “What was his name?” She asks, quietly, knowing he'll know that she doesn't mean Ben.

   “Lane.” He answers softly his eyes opening slowly. Cindy can see that they're shimmering slightly.

   “He was your friend.” She states.

   “No,” Alec shakes his head slightly, “He was my brother. Zack was Max's oldest unit sibling when we were kids, and Lane was mine.” Cindy nods slowly, that explains the strength of his reaction. She gets to her feet and walks over to lay a sympathetic hand on his arm.

   “And now he's gone.”

   “Yes.” His voice is barely above a whisper. “Now he's gone.” He blinks quickly, and she can see him trying to reign in his emotions. She gives him a few moments to master himself, leaving her hand where it is but not intruding any more than that on his grief.

   “And that's why you don't want Max to know that Clara is your sister.” Cindy states after a couple of minutes, pausing to consider before she adds, “And Ben's.” Alec breathes out sharply through his nose, then nods.

   “It's bad enough she holds Ben against me, I won't have her holding him against Clara.” He pulls his arm gently from beneath her hand, “I have more experience of dealing with other people's bullshit than she does.”

   “Aren't you worried that Max will work it out? I did after all.”

   “I was a little worried when she first met Clara and Debbie.” He tells her, “But I'm not really surprised that she hasn't twigged.” Cindy's forehead creases a little at the tone of his voice, prompting him to explain. “Look OC, I know Max is your best friend and she's why you're involved in this and everything.” Her frown deepens for a moment at what he just stated before she catches up with his continuing words. “But you've got to realize that Max mostly only sees what she wants to see, or what will support her view of the world. She has a need to see her unit and herself as different from the rest of us, as better. She needs to see her unit as Manticore's victims and the rest of us, or the X Series at least, as complicit with Manticore. So she only sees what supports those views.”

   Cindy starts to deny his words, he makes Max sound like some kind of self-centered revisionist with a superiority complex and Cindy _knows_ that ain't true, but stops herself. Alec hasn't actually called her that, and surely he wouldn't have said those things if that wasn't what he thought? Does Max really come across like that to him? And what about how the others see her?

   She sighs, rubbing her forehead as she turns away from him and steps back to the sofa and retakes her seat, “You really think that Max is like that? That she thinks like that?”

   “I know that.” He answers her quietly, “From the things she's said to me, or Joshua, or one of the others, it's pretty clear that she does think like that.”

   “It makes you angry.” 

   “Not angry exactly.” Alec tilts his head upwards to the ceiling, pressing the top of his head to the wall behind him. “Frustrated, yes. Disappointed, yes. But not angry.”

   “So you're frustrated with her. And on Monday you were worried about Clara, and angry about what Callum said about her and Debbie. So when Clara became upset and Max was still...”

   “Laying into me? Spewing vitriol?” Alec suggests when she trails off. “Yes, I lost control of my temper and snapped back.” He grimaces and murmurs to himself, almost too quietly for Cindy's human hearing, “I can't believe I lost control around civilians like that.” He shakes himself and lowers his head to look at her, “Which is, I guess – now that you've confirmed my relationship with Clara - what this talk is about?” 

   When he meets her eyes, she can see that they've gone blank again, and his facial expression goes bland to match. She nearly winces but sighs instead. “No Alec, I'm not going to chew you out for losing ya temper. My girl was outta line, I know that. She'd been outta line all day. And if OC had a' been you she woulda lost her temper a lot earlier and a lot worse.” Alec blinks at her in surprise, the blankness bleeding away slowly. “I just wanted to talk to you.”

   “Talk?” He looks confused as he tilts his head questioningly, “To me?”

   “Yes. To make sure you're okay.”

   “Why?” She watches his surprise and confusion deepen for a few seconds before his expression smoothes out, “Everything's fine. Max and I talked last night. Sorted things out. You don't have to worry about her.” Cindy frowns as he seems to miss the point of what she's saying. Before she can say anything, his cell beeps and he pulls it out of his jacket pocket, reads the text message, and quickly puts it away. “I need to go. I'll see you at Crash later.” He doesn't wait for an answer before striding across the apartment.

   “Alec.” She calls to him as he opens the door, and he turns and looks at her. “Are you ok? You can talk to me ya know?”

   He gives her a bright, and meaningless, smile, “Why wouldn't I be ok? I'm always alright. You know that.” With that he disappears, the door closing with click behind him.

   “No, I don't know that.” She sighs, “Because you aren't 'Always Alright'.”


	19. Biggs

   Friday night at Crash is always noisy with music and laughter and friends calling out to each other, and this Friday night is no different. And like every Friday night, the employees of Jam Pony Messenger Service have decamped en masse to the the club to drink and dance and bemoan the hopeless nagging nerdiness of one Reagan Ronald, their ever-bipping boss.

   Biggs eels his way free of the press at the bar, two pitchers of beer held high out of the way of careless elbows. Cece is behind him with another two jugs, and the two of them make their way to the back room where their thirsty friends are gathered. Depositing a pitcher on one of their claimed tables, he pours himself a glass from the other before placing it down on the other table, knowing if he'd put it down straight away there's a good chance he wouldn't get so much as a mouthful. Taking a sip, he glances over at the sound of Alec's cheer as he watches Sketchy beat Skye at the Foosball table.

   It's good to see Alec laughing. He rubs ruefully at his ribs as he remembers their “discussion” the previous day about Biggs' over protectiveness – he hadn't appreciated Biggs communicating his worry about the younger man's health to Cleo. Speaking of over protectiveness, he glances across the table to where Cece is now smirking to herself. “What?” He mouths. When she just shrugs, he frowns at her and her smirk widens. “No, really, what are you smirking at?” He says, out loud this time. 

   She shakes her head slightly before standing, glass in hand, “Come dance with me. Maybe I'll tell you.” He sighs and follows her, bringing his own beer with him.

   Making their way onto the dance floor, they each rest their free hands on the other's waist as they start to move lightly to the music pounding from the speakers. After a few minutes of waiting impatiently, Biggs grumbles, “So, what were you smirking at?”

   “I was just picturing something.”  
   “Picturing what?”  
   “452's face when she finds out.”  
   “Finds out?” Biggs stares warily at the look of wicked glee on Cece's face.  
   “How much did Alec tell you, about what I told him, about 'you-know-who'?”

   “Not much. But then you didn't tell him much did you? Something about a deadline?”

   The blonde woman nods, “Tomorrow night. He's got until then to reveal himself to Alec or I spill the beans.”

   “And that's got what to do with 452? Apart from the obvious.” Biggs inquires curiously.

   She takes a long drink from her beer before answering. “He and I had another talk last night. Seems Max knows a lot more about what happened to him than you'd think.”

   “Oh?”  
   “Yes.”

   Curious. It looks like whatever it is Cece now knows is enough to piss her off and make her even more annoyed at Max than usual. “And you think that her face will be entertaining when she finds out that, what? That he was re-indoctrinated? That he was Renfro's pet? Or that he's been stalking Alec instead of her?”

   “Yes to all. Though she'll probably react to each of those differently.” She takes another sip before continuing. “Anguish, anger, jealousy. All three should be entertaining.”

   “God, you really are a bitch sometimes, you know that?” Biggs is amazed at times at just how spiteful the females can be with each other. Cece just shrugs one shoulder and smiles.

   “I have to get my kicks somehow, don't I? And at least I usually have a reason to be a bitch. Unlike _some_ people.” No prizes for guessing who she's referring to. Biggs rolls his eyes. 

   “So you're looking forward to tomorrow night with bated breath then?”

   “Yeah. Unless it happens tonight. I'm hoping he'll get his ass in gear and stop lurking.”

   He chokes on a mouthful of beer and she whacks him hard on the back. “He's not?”

   “He is.”

   Checking to make sure Alec isn't looking, Biggs starts to surreptitiously scan the corners of the club, “Where?”

   “Five o'clock.”

   Glancing over his shoulder, he finally spots Ben hovering in the shadows behind a display of wrecked bicycles. “What are we gonna do?”

   “We?” Cece comments in amusement. “We are doing nothing. I am going to sit back and see what happens.”

   “You? Sit back and watch?” Biggs goggles at her. Cece _never_ sits back and watches what happens; Cece always _makes_ things happen; usually she makes things happen her way. She tries and fails to give him an innocent look before sauntering away and leaving him open mouthed on the dance floor. “Yeah right. I'll believe that when I see it.” 

   She gestures rudely over one shoulder and walks back to the rest of their group. Biggs makes sure that Alec isn't paying attention to him before making his way, circuitously, around the club to Ben's hiding place. “What are you doing?” 

   Ben startles and gives him a wide eyed look before attempting to look nonchalant. “What do you mean?”

   “I mean, why are you here when you know he's on the lookout for you? Or well, not you specifically, but you know?” Biggs turns to lean against the wall beside him where he can keep an eye on the others across the room. “Because somehow I doubt you intend to approach him tonight.”

   “I... I wanted to watch him once more before, before he finds out and I become one more thing for him to worry about.” Ben glances at him for a moment before his eyes drop to the floor. His gaze only remains down for a few seconds before his eyes once more fix on Alec where he's laughing with the Jam Pony crew.

   “Fine.” Biggs sighs, rubbing two fingers across his brow, “I guess I can understand that. But I still think it's a bad idea. He might spot you, or smell you, or sense you, or whatever.”

   “I know.” Ben grimaces slightly, then asks tentatively, “Is... is he angry? About, you know, not knowing what's going on?”

   “He was somewhat irritated earlier in the week. But that had more to do with Cece and I not telling him more than you running off. ” Biggs takes a drink of his beer. “Plus, I think he was bothered by the strength of his reaction. You know he reacted to you even though he didn't know it was you, don't you?”

   “Because we're twins.” Ben says with a slight nod. 

   “And because he's, well,” Biggs pauses a moment, “You know what he is right?”

   “That he's an empath?”

   “Yeah.”

   “Of course, we both are.” Ben turns to him in surprise that is echoed in Biggs' own mind. He should have known that Ben is likely to be an empath if Alec is. Why hadn't it occurred to him? “ Wait,” Ben's surprise turns to guilt, “You mean he was picking up on what I was feeling? From all the way across the club?” His expression becomes concerned, “I didn't hurt him? Did I?”

   “No.” Biggs pats the younger man's arm. “You didn't hurt him. Surprised him and hijacked his instincts a bit? Yes. But you didn't hurt him. He was already keyed up anyway with worry over Clara and Debbie, and with what happened with that bastard Callum. Not to mention he'd spent the entire day with 452 being a humongous bitch to everyone, especially him.”

   “Who's Callum?” Ben asks.

   “Some dick who used to work at Jam Pony, who said some awful crap about the girls.” Biggs explains, “Got himself fired for it, after being introduced to Alec's right hook of course.”

   “Hmm.” 

   “I need to get back.” Biggs says, finishing off his glass, “Before Alec starts wondering where I am.”

   “Ok.”

   “Try not to get spotted, won't you? I don't really want to see what happens if he finds out that way. Or worse, if 452 spots you.”

   “I'll certainly try.” Ben answers with another grimace.

   “Good.” Biggs slaps him on the shoulder before making his way back around the club, as surreptitiously as earlier, before rejoining his friends.

 

   “Where've you been?” Alec asks him curiously, as Biggs drops into a seat beside him.

   “Nowhere.” He fixes a lascivious look on his face. “Just talking to some girls.”

   “Blew you off did they?” Alec gives him a smirk, which widens when he gives him an indignant look. “Not appreciative of the Biggsy charm eh?”

   “Fuck off, Lex.”

   Alec chuckles and pours them both a drink. “Hey OC.” He greets the black woman as she appears beside them. Biggs echoes the greeting as she smiles at them both and watches in curious amusement as Alec leans over to press his nose to her bare stomach. “You smell lovely.”

   “Of course. OC always smells lovely.” She answers with a touch of arrogance. “Now move that kitty nose before it gets whacked.” Alec pouts and Biggs laughs at the expression on his face as he sits back up.

   “Just thought I'd check on the effectiveness of that body lotion you wouldn't let me watch you apply.”

   “Uh huh.”

   “How did you manage to get so much?” Max asks, joining their conversation. Biggs can see her trying not to sound judgmental about Alec's dealings – which would be hypocritical if she had, as she knows how much Alec gets for TC through his sometimes shady transactions.

   “Managed to get hold of some really expensive perfume he wanted for some buyer.” Alec says nonchalantly. “He was very happy to make whatever deal I wanted, within reason.”

   “Oh?”

   “Yup.” Alec smiles smugly. “Got some other goodies too.”

   Biggs smirks as he watches Max resist asking what they are. She clearly wants to know, but also as clearly doesn't want to give him the satisfaction of her curiosity.

   A crash from across the club makes them all turn in that direction – it's just some glasses that have been knocked over but he takes the time to check out the rest of the club, as do the other Transgenics in their group, including Alec. He tenses up as he sees Alec still slightly, head tilted and frowning slightly in confusion. Is he picking up on Ben's presence?

   “Something wrong Biggs?” Max asks him. Damn, his concern must have shown on his face. Her query brings Alec's attention back onto him - a mixed blessing, it stops him from noticing Ben but now he's picking up on Biggs' tension.

   “Biggs?”

   “Nothing's wrong.” He says, hoping that it's enough of a truth for Alec not to read it as a lie. No such luck, he realizes as the younger man gives him a narrow eyed look.

   “You're lying.”  
   “I'm not.”

   Alec turns to Max with a fake smile, “You'd think after fifteen years he'd know how futile it is to lie to me wouldn't you? Obviously, the nursery staff dropped him on his head too often.” 

   “How do you know he's lying?” Max asks, her voice surprisingly mild considering the way she usually talks to him. 

   “Experience.” Alec shrugs lightly. Biggs is a little surprised by the fact that Alec doesn't tell her the rest. Why, exactly, doesn't he want 452 to know that he's psionic?

   “Drop it, Alec,” Biggs says with a sigh. “It's about that thing that Cece won't tell you.”

   “I see.” Alec gives him a dark look which he then turns on Cece. Unlike Biggs' look of remorse, the older girl just smirks at him before she leaves the table for another beer run.

   “What thing?” Max asks.

   “Nothing.” Alec and Biggs mutter.

   “What thing?” She asks again, more insistently, “Alec? What thing?”

   Any reply is stopped by an unfamiliar voice repeating his name. “Alec?” Biggs watches the other man turn to face the source of the voice.

   “Hey, Natalie.” Alec says with a smile, standing up to greet the newcomer, all sign of his annoyance gone. “Good to see you again.”

   “You too. How are you?” 

   They exchange pleasantries for another minute or so before Alec turns to introduce her. “Hey guys, this lovely lady is Natalie. Natalie, these are my friends. Biggs, Max and Cindy,” He pauses as they each nod and smile at her, “This is Sketchy.” He adds as the lanky human joins them. “And the woman who left our table just before you arrived is Cece.”

   “Nice to meet you all.” She blushes prettily as Biggs kisses her hand and smiles as Sketchy, less suavely, copies the gesture.

   “How did you meet Alec?” Max questions her, though it's plain that she has a pretty good idea already and is weakly – well, weakly as far as the other X5s in earshot are concerned – hiding her disdain.

   “We met a few months ago at a dance club in sector 3.” Natalie explains, “My friends had disappeared on me and Alec very kindly rescued me from the attentions of a sleazeball.”

   “That was nice of him.” Biggs says, before Max or Cindy can say anything about the despicableness of men, and before Sketchy can say anything awkward.

   “It was.” Natalie smiles brightly, “He was a perfect gentleman.” Her smile turns slightly wicked as she puts a slight emphasis on the word perfect. Max and Cindy both snort; Natalie's brow crinkles slightly at the implied insult. She shakes it off and continues. “And he's stayed in touch since. Though I must say,” She slaps lightly at Alec's arm, “Not all of those jokes you sent me are very gentleman like.” 

   Alec grins unrepentantly. “But they were funny weren't they?”

   “Yes.” She answers with a giggle as Alec pulls over a chair for her. She takes the seat and smiles at him in thanks. “I'm glad I came over when I did. I wasn't sure until I heard your friend say your name whether it was you or your brother.”Alec looks surprised at her words, and mildly confused. He clearly doesn't see the implication of what she said, of who she's most likely referring to. But Biggs does and he feels his stomach clench in anxiety about where this is going. “I guess the two of you must get that a lot. People confusing you I mean. I know I thought Ben was you when I met him.” 

   She's leaning down to put her purse underneath her chair so she doesn't see the response that the name Ben garners. Biggs watches as Alec freezes for a moment, even his breath going still, as his face drains of color and animation. 

   After that moment the younger man meets his gaze for a second before his shock-widened eyes move around to meet 452's. Biggs follows his eye-line to see the girl is just as pale and frozen as Alec.

   “Ben?” Max asks in a choked voice. Natalie looks up at her in confusion.

   “Alec's twin?” The human woman says in confusion. The confusion clears after a moment as she turns to Alec, who quickly schools his face into one of mild discomposure. “I guess that means the two of you haven't made things up then?” 

   “Err, no, we haven't.” He answers, “I... umm... you didn't mention that you'd met him in your texts?” Alec says, voice a little unsteady.

   “No, sorry. I wasn't sure what to say, and I didn't want to interfere. I mean,” She shakes her head, hair swishing around her shoulders. “He didn't tell me exactly what was up between you, just that he'd done some bad things and gotten you in a lot of trouble. So I didn't want to risk causing more problems.”

   “Umm, right.”

   Biggs' stomach is still clenching into knots as he watches his little brother struggle to act normally despite having no idea what or how much the human woman knows, and clearly having no idea what to do or say. He's a little startled at the strength of Alec's reaction and, as he notices it, that of Max. He can hear both of their pulses racing, and can tell that they're breathing too fast, though Alec at least is trying to hide and control it.

   Natalie begins to talk, clearly having no idea of the distress she's causing, and unaware of the death grip Alec and Max now have on each other's hand beneath the table. She's unaware too of the way that Cindy is resting a soothing hand on Max's shoulder, or of the fact that Alec has shifted his legs to rest his shins against Biggs' in a silent and instinctive request for support. Instead, she prattles on about the importance of family bonds, and forgiving your siblings, especially when they are remorseful.

   “You know,” She says, “You should call him. He's obviously still nervous about approaching you. Maybe if you made the first move?”

   Pressing his legs against Alec's to prompt him on, Biggs watches him shake himself slightly, clearing his throat and fixing a small, awkward smile on his lips. 

   “I, er, I don't have his current cell number.” Alec says quietly.

   “Oh!” Natalie smiles brilliantly. “Here, he gave it to me, same as you gave me yours.” She reaches down for her purse and digs out her cell phone. “I can send it to you.”

   “No need.” A dry voice intrudes on the tension of their table. They look up to see Cece finally re-entering the back room, holding tightly to the arm of a taller, hooded form and dragging him behind her. She shoves said form forwards, “He can give it to you himself.” 

   With that she reaches up to drag his hood and baseball cap back off his head. Ben stares at them, pale and looking like a deer in the headlights.

   “Err... Hi.”


	20. The Black Sheep

   Watching Biggs making his careful way back around the club to rejoin the other X5s and his Jam Pony colleagues, Ben sighs deeply. He feels a pang of longing as he watches Alec welcome the older man back with a smile and teasing words and wishes it were him. He wishes he could sit beside his brother with such ease and comfort, instead of skulking in the shadows spying on him. But it's hard to imagine his twin welcoming him with open arms and a smile. Ben tells himself that it'll be enough for him just to be near Alec, to be in the warmth of his circle without being hated. Though, whatever Cece says, he still holds a little doubt as to her assertion that Alec doesn't loathe the thought of him.

   He sees Max joining the conversation between Alec, Biggs and her room-mate and feels another pang in his heart. There's another one to whom he has caused harm, and from whom he desperately longs for forgiveness. Having observed Max these last six months, he fears her reactions even more than he does Alec's. He may not have caused Max the same level of pain and suffering that he has Alec, but it was from her that he begged the ultimate price when he asked her to kill him. A price she paid out of love and kinship, giving him a merciful death that would save him from Manticore. Or at least that was what they had both hoped – and Ben was going to have to disillusion her of that comforting belief. He winces at the thought.

   Rubbing his hands over his face, he sighs again. God, he just wants this weekend to be over. He's tired of the way his thoughts and fears have been chasing themselves in cowardly circles in his brain. He half wishes that Cece had just sorted the whole thing out for him.

   Adjusting his baseball cap so it continues to obscure his features, he glances around the room debating whether to leave when he spots the approaching shit storm.

   “Oh, crap.” He groans as he spots a pretty human woman that he'd spent a very enjoyable night becoming familiar with a couple of months ago. A woman who, as chance would have it, had become just as familiar with his brother a couple of months before that. He sees her head towards the back room area and Alec. This was so not good.

   Eyes fixed on his brother's table, he attunes his hearing to the conversation there as he makes his surreptitious way towards the door of the club. Unfortunately for him and his escape, he fails to notice that he has captured Cece's attention.

 

_“I guess the two of you must get that a lot. People confusing you I mean. I know I thought Ben was you when I met him.”_

 

   And those are the words that send him scurrying the last of the distance to the stairs, up them and out into the night. He's nearly made it to his bike when a weight hits him from behind. His panic makes him clumsy in his defense, but when he looks back on it later he'll realize that he wouldn't have had a hope of getting away anyway. After mere moments he finds himself pinned face down over the bonnet of a car, arms twisted up his back and Cece's elbow digging into the back of his neck.

   “Going somewhere 495?” She leans down to hiss the question into his ear. He struggles a little, growling and Cece snarls a warning in return. Instinct forces him to go limp in her hold – he may be bigger and physically stronger than her, and a fellow alpha to boot, but she's the senior X here in age, skill and strength of will and he submits with a whine. “I asked you a question soldier.” She demands, pulling him upright.

   “He knows.” He whimpers. “He knows I'm in Seattle.” He tries to pull out of her hold, but she just tightens her grip.

   “How?”

   “There's a woman, Natalie. She approached me in a club a couple of months ago. She thought I was Alec.” He explains in a rush, hoping if he does so quickly and satisfactorily enough, Cece will let him go before Alec gets a chance to put the pieces of the puzzle together. “I got talking to her and fed her a line about how I was the black sheep of the family and I'd gotten Alec in trouble so much that he wasn't speaking to me anymore. She promised not to mention me to him.” He takes a gasping breath. “But now she's in there talking to him, and she said my name. Now he knows.”

   He hears Cece let out a groan before she spins him around to face her. “So you're going to what? Make a run for it?”

   “Let me go. Please.” Ben pleads. “He'll be so angry. I... I should leave.”

   “No.” Cece snaps, giving him a shake. “You're going straight back into that club right now. You are going to face him before things go kaboom. You are _not_ going to make him hunt you down.”

   “Cece, please.” He's begging, voice choked, “Please, I can't.”

   “You can.” She gives him another shake. “You will.” She takes hold of his arm and starts dragging him back towards Crash. “Suck it up soldier. You're a Transgenic, not a sniveling human.” She tells him sternly, shoving him through the door in front of her.

   Ben's heart is racing, body trembling slightly as she moves him through the crowd. He tries desperately to follow her instruction and pull himself together, but it's a struggle. 

   As they approach the entry way to the back room area they hear the conversation inside.

   “You know, you should call him. He's obviously still nervous about approaching you. Maybe if you made the first move?”

   Cece pauses, clearly giving him a moment to calm his breathing. “I, er, I don't have his current cell number.” He hears Alec say quietly.

   “Here, he gave it to me, same as you gave me yours. I can send it to you.”

   “No need.” Cece says dryly as she enters the back room, holding tightly to Ben's arm. She shoves him forwards, “He can give it to you himself.” With that she reaches up to drag his hood and baseball cap back off his head. 

   Ben finds himself staring at his brother's shocked face. “Err... Hi.” He says, weakly. Well, isn't that a pathetic opener? But considering he feels like he could vomit up his insides, he'll forgive himself this time. 

   The shocked silence drags out with Ben and Alec frozen as they stare at each other. Max gazes in disbelieving hope at Ben as the rest of the Transgenics carefully watch the three of them. The moment is broken when the lanky human with them mutters, “Whoa. So cool.” before being smacked around the back of the head by the black woman, whose other hand rests on Max's shoulder. 

   “Ben!” He finds himself staggering backwards a few steps as Max flings herself at him, arms coming around his shoulders. “Oh my god!” He raises his own arms automatically to catch her, murmuring her name, but his eyes don't move from Alec's face. 

   He forces his attention down to the woman in his arms just as she moves back a little to look up at his face. “Ben? It's really you?”

   “Yeah, Maxie. It's me.” He forces out the affirmation and a weak smile and is unsurprised when it's followed by a hard slap across his face. 

   “You bastard!” He lets his head turn with the slap and makes no move to touch the reddening skin, she hadn't held back any with her strength. He doesn't blame her one bit and cringes in the face of her hurt expression. “I can't believe you... it's been months since....”

   “I'm sorry, Maxie.”

   “Sorry!” She nearly shrieks and slaps him again, though not as hard, “I can't believe you let me think... it's been nearly _six months_.” 

   “I know. I'm so sorry, I didn't know what to do, to say... I...” His words are cut off when she throws herself back against his chest with a harsh sob. “Maxie...” He wraps his arms around her and looks up, flushing in embarrassment at the fact that they're the center of fascinated attention. 

   Slowly, he lets his gaze wander over those observing them; he's deeply uncomfortable with the way the humans are watching them and aware of the judgment in the eyes of his fellow X5s. Lastly his eyes land back on Alec who, though not as pale and shocked as he was, is still clearly ill at ease. He has to drag his eyes away from his twin once again to concentrate on Max.

   “Maxie. I'm sorry.” He whispers, rubbing one hand up and down her back. She's not crying exactly but she's showing far more emotion than he knows she would be comfortable with. His observations of her these last months have told him that she's a very private person who keeps others at a distance. “Max, everyone's watching us.” 

   “Right.” She pulls back with a sniff, dashing one hand over her eyes quickly.

   “Wow, Max's all teary and shit.” Sketchy says stupidly, blinking at her in disbelief. This time it's Alec who smacks him around the back of the head. “Ow. Sorry.” 

   Everyone goes quiet again in the aftermath of Max and Ben's reunion. Ben shifts nervously from foot to foot, hands clasped awkwardly in front of him. His eyes flicker to and fro between Max and Alec, lingering longer and longer on Alec each time. 

   A loud sigh from Natalie causes everyone to turn to her. She rolls her eyes and mutters, “Men. Honestly.” Louder she says, “Ben, you wanted to say something to Alec?”

   “Uh... yeah. Alec, I...” His voice cracks a little and he has to clear his throat before carrying on. “Alec, I... I'm so sorry. I fucked up so bad. I swear I didn't mean to cause trouble. I didn't know...” He trails off to stare helplessly at his brother's blank expression. 

   “Alec?” Natalie speaks his name with a tone of clear prompting. Ben watches him glance at her, then Max before sharing a lingering look with Biggs. He looks back at Ben for a long moment.

   “Please...” Ben whispers, nearly silent. “Please, I'm sorry.”

   “Ok.” Alec says softly. “Apology accepted.” Ben sags as the words sink in. Though he knows that they're probably only for their audience, he hopes that they will be proven true.

   “Well,” Natalie claps her hands brightly, “That's a start to forgiveness surely? Families should always forgive each other. Now...” She smiles and gestures between them. Ben stares at her blankly, not knowing what she's prompting them to do now. He can see that Alec is just as confused.

   “She wants you two to hug.” Max's friend whispers behind her hand. Alec glances at her and then to Max who nods slightly. 

   Ben watches, holding his breath as Alec slowly rises from his seat and takes a couple of hesitant steps closer. He matches those steps bringing them almost chest to chest and stares into eyes that mirror his own. That part of the brain that always makes peculiar comments at the most inconvenient times tells him that Alec is half an inch taller than him – he tells the voice to shut up.  
His breath whooshes out as Alec cautiously puts one arm around his shoulders and he sinks against him, both arms coming up to lock too tightly around Alec's rib-cage. “Alexander.” He breathes out his brother's full name like a prayer, so softly that only they two can hear it. He realizes that the hug is going on too long, becoming an embrace, and that this kind of thing is not what men are supposed to do in public, but he can't let go. He feels Alec's hand come up to rest on the back of his neck and realizes he's trembling like a puppy, eyes shut tightly.

   “Ben?” He hears Max's voice a moment before she rests one hand lightly on his back. Alec tightens his grip slightly before stepping out of his hold and Ben whimpers softly.

   “Hush.” His brother murmurs, “It's ok.” The words are matched by a wave of warmth cresting over him and he realizes that Alec is projecting calm, trying to help him stabilize his emotions. He takes an unsteady breath and nods, letting him pull away.

   “Ok?” Alec questions and Ben nods again, opening his eyes. “Max?”

   “I'm fine. You?”

   “I'm always alright.” Ben's lips quirk as he hears Max snort at Alec's too casual reply. He watches Alec step away from them to lean with seeming nonchalance on the back of Biggs' chair.

   Another awkward silence descends on the group that is broken when a drunken woman stumbles into their midst. “Nat!” She calls dropping a heavy hand on Natalie's shoulder. “There you are. We wondered where you'd got to.” She glances around and her eyes stop on Alec and then flicker over to Ben.

   “Well, well.” She gives them both a lascivious look. “There really are two of you.” She smirks at her rapidly flushing friend. “You are a naughty, naughty girl Natalie. Twins! You hussy.” Ben has to fight down a smirk that is totally at odds with the rest of the situation.

   “Come on Becca.” Natalie quickly gets to her feet and takes hold of her friends' arm. “Let's go before you humiliate me completely.” She gives a strained smile, pausing only to wish Ben good luck, before she rushes off with her friend in tow.

   Ben can feel Max staring at him, but he can't take his eyes off of Alec, who is staring fixedly at his hands where they're gripping the wood of Biggs' chair.

   “So.” The single word makes all three of them jump and look at the woman who spoke it. “This is Ben. Which of you's is gonna introduce him properly?”

   “Ben, this is my girl, Original Cindy.” Max steps in to make the introduction. “OC this is Ben, he's my br...” Ben looks at her in alarm as he realizes she's about to refer to him as her brother, knowing the questions that would raise. Fortunately Max is interrupted before she can complete the word.

   “Dude! I had no idea you had a twin?” The lanky human who hangs around with Alec exclaims. 

   “Er... yeah.” Alec shrugs, “It just never came up.”

   “Man, Normal will have kittens.” Ben swallows an inappropriate giggle at his wording. “There's two of his Rock Star. God, let me be there when he finds out?”

   “Sure, Sketch.” Alec smiles distractedly at the human. “No problem.”

   Ben jumps as Max takes a tight hold of his arm, exactly where the bruises are blooming from Cece's earlier hold. He winces as she starts to drag him over to a corner. “We need to talk.” She tells him, and the almost ominous tone causes him to look at Cece in panic. The older girl just shrugs at him.

   “Max.” Alec follows them away from the others. “Do you really think this is the place?” She turns on him with a scowl, but Ben quickly interjects with his agreement. Though, he really, really doesn't want to have this talk.

   “Fine.” She snaps. “Let's go.” She about turns and starts to drag him away.

   “Wait.”

   “What?”

   “Alec should come. I mean, if he wants.” Ben looks at Alec in question. “You want an explanation, right?”

   “Why?” Max demands, “This is between us.”

   “No. No it isn't.” Ben contradicts her quietly. “He deserves to hear this as much as you. And I'd really rather beg for forgiveness from you both at the same time.”

   “You don't need his forgiveness.”  
   “You don't need my forgiveness.”

   They speak at the same time. He notices Max doesn't say anything about her forgiveness though.

   “But I do.” Ben shakes his head. “I've wronged the two of you more than anyone.” Alec starts to deny it but Ben shakes his head again. “It's true. And you both deserve an explanation. But I'd really rather not do it in front of a crowd.” He gestures around them.

   “Fine. Alec can come.” Max says ungraciously. 

   “You two should go on ahead.” Alec speaks up quietly, mollifying Max's annoyance slightly. “I'll meet you in a little while, I want to check in with HQ and stuff. Where should I meet you?” Ben looks to Max in inquiry for a few moments before making a quiet suggestion.

   “The Needle?” Possibly not the best place, considering the last time he and Max were there, but he knows it will give them privacy. And he knows that Max and Alec have been there together at least twice. Max bites her lip before nodding with a sigh.

   “Fine. Now, come on.” She begins towing him along again. Ben glances back to see Alec making their excuses to his and Max's friends from Jam Pony before drawing Cece and Biggs aside. 

   Outside, Ben takes a shaky breath of the smoke free air before trying to shake off Max's hold. “My ride's round the corner.” He gestures to their left.

   “Mine's in the alley.” Max gestures across from them. “I'll meet you at the Needle.” She takes a few steps away from him before turning to face him with a stern look. “You'd better be there. Don't make me come looking for you.”

   “I'll be there.” Ben assures her with a weak smile.

   “Ok.” She backs away towards her bike, not taking her eyes off him until she reaches the entrance to the alleyway. He smiles again and waves awkwardly before heading off to his own motorcycle.


	21. Explanations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

>  

   Ben is waiting on the roof of the Needle as Max climbs through the roof hatch to join him. She'd arrived first, but he saw her waiting in the shadows until he'd entered the foot of the building. Obviously, she'd wanted to make sure he kept his word that he would meet her.

   “Hey.” He says, turning to face her.

   “Hey.” They stare at each other silently, neither of them sure what to say.

   “What...” Max licks her lips nervously, “What happened after...you know?” Ben drops his eyes at the question, arms moving to wrap around his own waist. 

   “I...I don't remember how they...what they had to do to...” He shivers slightly, “It's all a strange blur of sounds and sensations. Lost time...half waking to the smell of the labs...the sound of the heart monitor and ventilator...floating on the drugs...” He closes his eyes, “Until I woke up. Realized I was alive.”

   “And then?” She asks hesitantly.

   “I...They...” He shivers again, harder and whimpers. 

   “Ben?” Max comes over and rests her hands on his arm and chest.

   “Can we...can we wait for Alec?” He looks up at her face in time to see hurt followed by a mutinous expression. He hurries to explain, “I don't want to explain twice. And he really does have a right to know what they did. How they re-indoctrinated me.” Her expression remains angry so he resorts to pleading, “Please, Maxie. Don't make me explain it twice. Please?”

   She softens at his words, “Fine. We'll wait for Alec before you explain.”

   “Thanks.” He gives her a tremulous smile and loosens his hold on himself, arms dropping down to his sides. She takes his hands and looks up at his face.

   “I can't believe you're really here.” She whispers. He squeezes her hands and lifts them to rest on his chest, over his heart. “I've dreamed of you being alive so many times...thought of all the ways I could have saved you.” She pauses to take a shuddering breath, “Sometimes a part of me hoped that Manticore could bring you back, especially after Zack...” She trails off not knowing what to say about their brother, what Ben might know.

   “Poor Zack. What they did to him.” He says sadly, answering her unvoiced question.

   “I know.” Now it's Max shuddering. Sure, she's glad that Zack's alive, but seeing what had become of her strong big brother – it hurt. 

   They stand silently for few moments before she continues, “I hoped they could have saved you sometimes, but that would have meant I'd failed you.” She closes her eyes, tears springing to them and her voice becomes suddenly choked. “The way I _did_ fail you. God Ben, I'm so sorry. I failed you.”

   “No,” He denies, wrapping his arms around her, “No, you didn't fail me. You tried to free me. ”

   “But I didn't! It didn't work!”

   “And how could you have possible known they would be so prepared?” He asks her, “You thought a broken neck would be enough. _I_ thought it would be enough.” He squeezes her to his chest. “How could either of us have known how advanced Manticore had become?” He feels her shake her head against his chest, murmuring apologies and words of guilt.

   “Stop it.” He says pulling her away slightly and forcing her to meet his eyes. “It wasn't your fault. None of it. There was nothing else you could have done on that day, in that place. And there was certainly nothing you could have done before that day. No,” He puts one finger against her lips, “That's enough.” She nods reluctantly for a moment before her face twists as she tries to hold back tears and he pulls her back into his chest as she starts to cry.

   “Let it out, Maxie.” He holds her tightly, stroking her back and murmuring comforting nonsense as she weeps, swaying them slightly side to side. “Let it all go. It's ok.”

   A little while later, after Max's tears have dried up and her breathing has returned to normal, they move inside and down a few flights to what used to be the Space Needle's restaurant, where they find themselves an old bench seat to curl up on. They discuss little things, swap meaningless little stories of their years apart. It's a balm after the emotions of earlier, and heals them ever so slightly.

   A lull in their conversation is broken by the sound of a jingle being tapped out in metallic tones and a few minutes later Alec knocks on the door frame before entering and making his way to where they sit.

   “Everything all right in TC?” Max asks, speaking up first.

   “Same old.” He shrugs in reply, “How about here?”

   “As much as you'd expect.” She answers quietly. Alec nods in return, looking sober and unsurprised. He hunts around for an unbroken chair and carries it over, taking a seat a few meters away from them. Ben allows himself a moment to stare forlornly at the distance before he shakes himself – what exactly does he expect, after all?

   “So...” Alec says, looking from Max, to Ben, and back again.

   “So.” Echoes Max. They both turn to look at Ben who shrinks slightly under their expectant gaze. After a moment where he stares at them, his eyes wide, Max prompts him, “You were going to explain what happened after you woke up back at Manticore.”

   “Right.” Ben replies faintly. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, bracing himself. This was going to suck so bad. Okay, short and to the point would probably be best all round, right? “Right. Well, I woke up in a body brace and restraints. It took me a few minutes to realize that I was still alive and where I was, and then I realized that Lydecker was there. He told me how they'd found me. And explained a _little_ of what they had to do on the scene, and how they kept me alive on the trip back and what they did once I was there. He tried to get me to tell him who it was who'd...”

   “Killed you.” Max whispers, completing his sentence.

   “Yeah.” Unconsciously he lifts one hand to rub at the back of his neck where she'd snapped it, only realizing what he's doing when Max flinches. He drops his hand and continues. “I wouldn't tell him, but I think he knew it was you anyway.”

 

   “He did.” She confirms. “I'd already had a couple of run-ins with him, so he knew I was in Seattle.”

   “If he knew where you were, why didn't you displace?” Alec asks, frowning.

 

   “Because Seattle's my home.” Max replies firmly, lifting her chin. “My first true home. And I wasn't going to let him chase me out when I'd spent ten years running from the bastard.” Ben stares at her, open mouthed. He can't imagine staying in a city where he'd been made, just out of stubbornness. But then, didn't he keep on with his psychotic rituals even when he knew Manticore were on to him?

   “And?” Alec asks, one eyebrow raised as he gives her a pointed look. What had he seen in her face that Ben hadn't, that he thought that there might be another reason? He turns to face Max and takes in the slightly embarrassed look on her face.

   “And...” She shifts a little in her seat, “Zack ordered me to leave. Repeatedly.”

   “Of course he did.” Ben sighs, “And of course you had to go against him.”

   “Of course.” Max replies with a toss of her head. Ben's eyes catch Alec's and they share a look of exasperated amusement. “So, Lydecker was there?” Max asks, bringing them back to Ben's explanation.

   “Yeah.” Ben droops at the reminder. “He lectured me about how stupid I'd been and how I'd let him, and our unit, and Manticore down. Once I was thoroughly miserable he called in the nurse and told her to prep me for a second batch of tests.”

   “Tests?”

   “To make sure that I wasn't paralyzed or brain damaged. So MRI, CT, EEG the works. They'd done one lot of tests when I was still comatose. I guess that's when they found out.”

   “Found out what?” 

 

   “About the tumor” Ben looks down at his hands as he says it. “They said that it was the biggest thing that contributed to my...psychosis.” 

   “A brain tumor?” Max asks at the same time as Alec mumbles,

   “Oh, thank fuck for that.” Max turns and glares at him, hissing his name. “What, you don't think I was still worried? Just because Psy Ops gave me the all clear?”

   “You could be a little less tactless.” She tells him severely. He just blinks and frowns.

   “Whatever.”

   Ben clears his throat to stop them arguing. “Well, anyway, they found there was nothing else wrong except the tumor, which had to be removed, obviously.” He pauses to run his fingers through his hair to where they'd opened up his skull. “As soon as I was recovered enough from the surgery and treatments, they started softening me up for re-indoctrination.” All three of them shiver at that.

   After a moment, Ben takes a deep breath and continues, “There was all the physical stuff, you know?”

   “The drugs, the laser, the indoctrination videos. I know.” Max nods confidently. “They did it all to me too.” Alec looks at her and frowns. “What?”

   “And the rest?”

   “What rest?” She asks, confused.

   “Like the beatings,” Ben answers her instead, “Fists, bats, whips,” He clenches his jaw in remembered anger and humiliation, “The worst was the fucking cane. Like a teacher beating an unruly student.” With his eyes closed he misses the look on Max's face.

   “I wanted to break it into pieces and shove them up each of the bastard's asses.” Alec comments quietly.

   “Yeah.” Ben breathes, a vicious smile crossing his face. “That would have been sweet.” His eyes open to meet Alec's. “Almost as sweet as it would have been to stick them with their own god damn stun batons.” They share a look of vengeful accord, their eyes dark with shared experiences.

   “They beat you?” Max asks in a strangled voice. The twins break their gaze, turning to her in mutual surprise to find her staring at Ben in tearful horror. Ben knows that Max didn't get the full re-indoctrination treatment, but he hadn't realized that it hadn't even involved so much as one beating. Maybe it would be best not to tell her the rest?

   “Yes.” He nods. “More than once. But the physical stuff wasn't what broke me. I'm X5 after all, we're all built and trained to withstand torture. Even those of us with less training.”

   “What was it then?” Max asks with clear reluctance.

   “The emotional.” He replies with a bitter smile. “It's always the emotional with me. It always was. You remember?” He sees it in her eyes that she does remember. She nods slightly, and he knows his words have reminded her of the many incidents in their childhood, where he had to desperately hide his sensitive nature from the guards.

   “'Too emotional'. 'Shows tendency towards attachments.'” Alec whispers, staring at the wall behind them - or more likely, staring at the past, or some damned report. “'Shows compassion.' 'Aberrant.' 'Weak.'” His eyes sharpen as he comes back to the present and meets Ben's gaze again, “What did they expect? With our genetics? Our 'gifts'?” Ben tilts his head in recognition of his meaning. He turns back to Max just as she's coming out of her recollections, having missed the last exchange between he and Alec.

   “What...” She licks her lips uneasily, “What did they do?”

   “There were reports. Pictures. Videos. ” He tells them quietly. “Of the unit mates we left behind in the barracks or in the snow. Of those re-indoctrinated because of the escape.” Ben looks at Alec in apology, who smiles back weakly in acknowledgment.

   “Pictures? That's not what I expected. Doesn't sound like Psy Ops.” 

   “Oh,” Ben smirks darkly, “Those were just some of the tools for the emotional torment. To bring out grief, guilt, anger, feelings of inadequacy, of failure, more guilt.” Max reaches over to take his hand and he squeezes hers lightly. “And of course, it gave them something to build on when it came to the mental manipulations and psychological torment. Lends reality to the nightmares, you know?”


	22. Apologies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
>   
> 

__  
“Oh,” Ben smirks darkly, “Those were just some of the tools for the emotional torment. To bring out grief, guilt, anger, feelings of inadequacy, of failure, more guilt.” Max reaches over to take his hand and he squeezes hers lightly. “And of course, it gave them something to build on when it came to the mental manipulations and psychological torment. Lends reality to the nightmares, you know?”  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   His voice is rife with remembered pain and Max leans over to wrap her arm around his shoulders.

   “I'm sorry.” She whispers. 

 

   “Not your fault. It was my own for bringing them down on me.” He replies, giving another light squeeze to the hand he's still holding. “No, it was my fault I was re-indoctrinated. And it was my fault that Alec was. Only he was much younger.” He looks up and frowns at the look of astonishment in Alec's eyes, confused at what he could have said that would be causing that reaction.

   “That wasn't your fault.” Alec denies quietly. “None of you could have known what would happen in response to your escape. And most of you didn't know that you weren't the only clones of your templates.” Max looks at Alec in surprise. Obviously, he must have given her the impression that he felt otherwise. “You were just kids. And you weren't exactly thinking rationally, were you?” He looks at both of them at that question and each shakes their head in agreement. 

   Ben feels a little of the guilt crumble slightly at Alec's words – maybe Cece was right when she said that Alec doesn't blame him for the escape. Though, he doesn't understand why his brother's eyes showed astonishment at Ben claiming responsibility. But if Alec doesn't blame him for his first bout of re-indoctrination, there's no way he can deny that Ben is the reason for the six months he spent in Psy Ops two years ago. 

   “That wasn't the only time I wasn't thinking rationally though was it?” He states quietly, bringing up the painful subject of his psychosis. He looks away but sees them them both flinch out of the side of his vision. “The worst thing is,” He confides, “That rationality didn't disappear from the outset. It took a while for me to loose control, and I knew something was happening, something bad. But I was a coward.”

   “No, you weren't.” Max denies quickly. 

   “Yes, I was.” He stands up and paces a few steps away from the bench, “I should have gotten in touch with Zack and told him.” He turns to face Max again. “Or Zane. Or Krit and Syl. Or _any_ of them.” Ben doesn't understand the look of betrayal that crosses Max's face before it's chased away by returning concern for him - concern he doesn't deserve.

   “Ben...” Max reaches out a hand into the space between them. 

   “I was going to hand myself in, did you know that?” She looks shocked at the admission. “Three times I tried, in those first few months. And three times, I chickened out.”

   “Ben...” Max holds out her hand again. He shakes his head and backs away a few more steps.

   “My cowardice is unforgivable.” He says, face wreathed in self loathing. “Look what happened because I let my stupid, irrational fears get the better of me.” He shivers as tears spring to his eyes. “Eleven people are dead, their families grieving.” He bites his lip, nails digging into his palms. 

   “Ben...” This time it's Alec who reaches out a hand. He catches hold of Ben's sleeve and Ben turns on him almost angrily.

   “Why don't you hate me?” He demands. “Why don't you both hate me?” Ben's face is flushed with emotion as he glares at first Alec and then Max.

   “I can't hate you.” Max says fervently, “You're my brother.” 

   “When you tried to help me, I fought you, and I wasn't sparring. I don't know what I would have done, but I wasn't sparring.” He runs both hands though his hair before gripping the strands tightly, “I begged you to kill me, forced you into the role of executioner. Fuck Max, I nearly got you captured!”

   “But, I wasn't captured.”

   “And we both know how fucking close it was!” He gestures wildly, then jumps like a scalded cat when Alec catches his hand.

   “Calm down.” Alec says firmly, as he squeezes their hands together. 

   “How can I?” He cries. “How can I be calm about the damage I caused?” Max rises from her seat to take his other hand. “I hurt you.”

   “Yes, it hurt.” She says quietly, catching and holding his eyes, “To think that you were dead by my hand, that I'd failed so thoroughly to help you. But how can you think that I'm not happy and grateful to find out that you're alive?”

   “You didn't seem too pleased with me earlier.”

   “Don't get me wrong, I'm pissed that you didn't come to Seattle straight away, and we _will_ be discussing that. But right now, I'm just thankful that I get my brother back.” She says firmly before wrapping her arms around his waist and hugging him tightly. He wraps his left arm around her, but can't bring himself to let go of Alec's hand.

   “I'm just thankful that I get a second chance to make things up to you.” Ben says quietly. Max pulls away slightly to look up at him. 

   “You don't have to make it up to me. Just having you here with me is enough.” She tells him with a smile. She tugs lightly at his arm until he reluctantly looses his hold on Alec and moves with her back to their seat.

   Looking down and away slightly he picks at the fabric of the bench beneath them. The emotional baggage he's been carrying around feels slightly lighter, but there's still so much to admit and, whatever Max says, so much to make up for. He glances sideways at Alec and sees him staring at the wall with a thoughtful frown.

   “What else did they do to you?” Max asks gently. 

   “As I said, and as you said.” Ben replies with a grimace, “Drugs, the laser, indoctrination videos, beatings, emotional and mental manipulations. And always and ever telling me what a failure I was, that I am. Telling me over and over, how much pain and suffering I have caused. To my unit sibs and the other Xs, and especially to you and Zack and Alec.”

   “Alec told you it wasn't your fault.” She denies, voice trying for authoritative, but only sounding like she was trying to persuade him.

   “The re-indoctrination after the escape.” He turns to look at Alec's profile where the other man is staring out of the window, and directs the rest of his words to him, “You may not blame me for the escape, but you _know_ it's my fault you spent six months in Psy Ops.”

   “It's not your...”

   Ben interrupts Max's platitude, insisting, “It is my fault. I told you, I knew something was wrong. I shouldn't have let things get that far.”

   “But, you didn't know about Alec.”

   “That doesn't matter.” He states hotly. “I screwed up big time. I put our unit in danger, put our whole kind in danger. Maybe I didn't know about Alec to know he would be punished in my stead, but I knew that someone else might suffer. Just because no-one in our unit was fucking tortured, doesn't make it ok.” 

   “He wasn't...”

   “He. Was. Tortured.” Ben enunciates firmly. “Just because they called it 'psychiatric assessment' doesn't mean it wasn't torture. Those bastards...” He shivers, eyes filled with misery, as he forces Max to hold his gaze and hear what he is saying. “They showed me the files.” He feels more than sees Alec's head snap around to look at him. “In black and white, coldly stating what they did to him. Documented in glossy photos, and filmed for their own sick reasons.”

   He sees the reluctance in Max's face as she starts to really listen and he watches as she looks over at Alec. Whatever she sees in his face is a confirmation and she pales. “Alec...” She whispers.

   “Don't.” He answers her, and the dead tone to his voice causes Ben to look at him too. “Just don't. I told you before, you don't understand how bad it could be.” Ben can hear the unspoken 'And you don't want to understand' hanging between the two them. 

   A tense silence falls as Alec sits rigid with tension, his fingers digging harshly into his thighs. Unable to watch his blank face, Ben turns to stare at Max who's staring at Alec with a pity that hurts Ben to see – neither of them have the right to pity Alec; she has no right to look at him in anything other than admiration for all that he has survived. 

   Max breaks the silence when she turns to Ben and asks, “Why did they show you his files? That's not normal Manticore policy.”

   “To hurt me, of course.” Ben answers, “To make me feel guilty for what I'd caused.” He drops his eyes in remorse. “I'm so sorry, Alec.” He says, choking up, “The things they did, and it's all my fault.” Max lays a hand on his arm but he flinches away from her touch. He doesn't deserve comfort from her or anyone else. When she tries again he moves away, sliding from beneath her hand and from the bench.

   In agitation he begins to pace, hands rising to clench at his hair. He mutters words of apology and guilt, the odd phrase from Alec's Psy Ops report slipping from his lips. He's unaware of the looks he's getting or of the tears sliding down his face. He skitters away when Max tries to catch hold of him, pacing further away.

   “My fault....all my fault,” He babbles, quickening his steps, “So much blood...the sick fuck was _smiling_...making him scream...I'm sorry, sorry, sorry...” Max tries once more but he dodges further away again. “No, no, no, don't touch me! ...My fault, my fault...leave him alone!” He lets out a cry as he's caught by strong hands and starts to struggle. 

   “Ben...”  
   “Have to stop them...make them stop...don't hurt him!”  
   “Ben...493...Ben!” 

   He finds himself caught against an almost identical chest, arms trapped between them. A firm hand takes hold of his chin, forcing him to meet eyes that are a mirror of his own. For a moment, his emotions of guilt and pain battle with emotions of concern and a little fear before a wave of calm blankets him so sweetly that he gasps out “Lex?” He feels the body pressed to his flinch and his eyes clear as he's forced back into the moment, “Alec?”

   “You need to calm down.” The other man tells him. “It's over. All over. Neither of us are there anymore.”

   “I'm sorry.” Ben whimpers another apology, “I'm so sorry.” He trembles in his brother's hold.

   “Hush. Calm down. Can you hear my heartbeat?” Alec's hold on him is still firm, one hand on his chin and the other spread between his shoulder blades. Ben focuses his hearing and nods shakily as he locks onto the rhythmic pumping of Alec's heart, beating a little fast. “Concentrate on it, count out the beats until one hundred, let it calm you.” He follows the instructions, counting in a shaky voice.

   “One, t-two, three, f-four, five...”

   “That's it, I'm here. I'm not in Psy Ops anymore. I'm fine.” Alec continues to talk soothingly as he slides his hand around to cup the back of Ben's neck. The sound of his heart beating strong, returning to it's normal steady pace, calms Ben until he's no longer trembling and his own heart and breathing level out. “Good, good.”

   “Ninety-seven, ninety-eight, ninety-nine, one hundred.” The simple trick has worked and Ben takes a deep cleansing breath, closing his eyes and dropping his head to rest his forehead on Alec's collar bone. “Sorry.” He mumbles.

   “S'okay.” Hands move from their comforting hold to take a gentle grip on his upper arms and he lifts his head as he's pushed away slightly. “You ok now?”

   “Yeah.” Another shaky nod before Ben moves back a few paces. He can feel his face heating in embarrassment at his loss of control. “Lady, I'm pathetic.” He dashes his hands across his cheeks, wiping away the dampness from his tears.

   “No, you're not.” Max tells him quietly, coming to him and taking his hand gently. “You were flashing back to Psy Ops, weren't you? What they were doing to you?” Ben nods shakily. “They tried to mess you up.”

   His breakdown has left him feeling raw and vulnerable and the lingering emotional link from Alec calming him has left his mental shields wobbly. The touch of Max's bare skin against his means he can feel her anger at Manticore like it's a tangible presence. It's a dark and massive thing: He can taste it's violent intensity and it makes him shiver. Subtly, he breaks the skin on skin contact to grip her elbow lightly, leading her back towards their seat once again.

   “Maybe they did mess me up some. But they fixed me pretty good too.” Max snorts her disbelief, but he insists, “They did. No more brain tumor, no more delusions, no more paranoia.”

   “No more paranoia?” Max stares at him in skepticism. “Then what the hell was that?” She gestures across the room to where he'd had his mini breakdown.


	23. Recounting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
>   
> 

  
_“Maybe they did mess me up some. But they fixed me pretty good too.” Max snorts her disbelief, but he insists, “They did. No more brain tumor, no more delusions, no more paranoia.”_  
 _“No more paranoia?” Max stares at him in skepticism. “Then what the hell was that?” She gestures across the room to where he'd had his mini breakdown._  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   “Guilt. It was my fault Alec was re-indoctrinated, it was because of me he spent six months in 'psychiatric observation'.” He speaks the last word with derision. “Haven't we just been through this?”

   After a long pause, Max nods grudgingly, “You're right. You've already said it. But that doesn't mean you're right, that it is your fault.” 

   Ben is perplexed by her bullheadedness. It's a case of simple facts: Ben escaped, so Alec and the other 49s were dragged down to Psy Ops for re-indoctrination; Ben had a psychotic break and started killing, so his twin was carted back to Psy Ops where they tried to see if they could break him. Ergo, it's his fault. It's pretty clear. So what is there to question?

   Shaking his head, he sighs a little and turns away. He looks across the room to the window where Alec is leaning against the cracked glass, staring out at the night. He catches the movement of Max following his gaze as she calls out, “Alec?”

   “Hmm?” He tilts his head to show he's listening.

   “How did you know that would work? The heartbeat and counting?” There's an undercurrent of anger to her words that makes Ben frown. Is she angry that Alec knew how to calm him down? Or is she jealous because he was able to?

   Alec turns around to lean backwards against the window, his face is in shadow, his body backlit by the moon. Ben makes out a shrug before the other man answers quietly. “It's worked on me before.” Max starts a little at the admission; Ben just feels an ache at the thought that he hadn't been the one there for him. He watches him push away from the glass and make his way back across the room to rejoin them. “How long were you in re-indoc Max?”

   “About a month.” She lifts her chin proudly and Ben wonders at it. “I was at Manticore just under 14 weeks.”

   “Ben?”

   “About ten weeks, including Psy Ops.” Ben answers softly.

   “10?!”

   Ben nods at Max's exclamation before continuing. “I was 4 weeks or so in med before that. Then I was put back into training just over 8 weeks before the base was cauterized.” He turns to her as Max catches her breath in a half-sob, half growl.

   “That bitch!” She grits her teeth. “Renfro, she showed me your picture along with Tinga's. Because you were both dead because of me. And you weren't dead! You were there, in the same facility, in training just like I was.” He catches her forearm and squeezes it lightly, still avoiding skin-on-skin contact.

   “Neither of us saw you in the training yards.” Alec says, voice lilting in a half-question.

   “I was kept separate. Renfro...” 

   “That bitch!” Max bites out again. “Her and her fucking games. So desperate to break me to her will, she just had to keep on trying to get to me.”

   Ok, so Max thinks he was kept separate to keep her from finding out he was alive. Maybe that was part of it, but he knows that it was more about keeping it from Alec. He also suspects that some of it was about Renfro exerting control over the Transgenics and proving that they would follow her order to keep something so personally significant from their Commander.

   Somehow, he thinks it would be a really bad idea to tell Max that he knows exactly what games Renfro was and wasn't playing with her, as well as the reasons before and after she got Max's full DNA assay. In this case, keeping his mouth shut is probably the best thing to do.

   “Director Renfro was always one for playing with people's heads, whether they were humans or Transgenics.” Alec comments with an expression that speaks of experience. “I think all three of us can attest to that.” With a shake of his head, he brings the discussion back on track. “If you weren't in the training yards, what kind of training were you getting?” Ben can hear the experienced soldier and CO beneath his words, trying to asses Ben's skills and whether he might be an asset. He feels his heart leap with hope at the implication.

   “Physically it was mainly strength and reconditioning in the gym for the first few weeks. I wasn't up to much else at first. ” He answers candidly. “So, they started testing my knowledge to see how much I retained from my lessons before the escape, despite what had happened since. Once I was up to it, they started testing my martial arts skills. At first, it was with human trainers, but that didn't work out so well,” He grimaces and hurries on as he sees Max open her mouth to question, not wanting to get into it, “So then, they brought in a few Xs for me to spar with, while the trainers watched. They kept that arrangement once I started new lessons, but I'd only just begun really when everything went to hell.” He very carefully doesn't look at Max, so he sees clearly the way annoyance chases across Alec's face and questions build up in his mind. He has a good idea of the questions Alec wants to demand answers to – like exactly who it was that had been sparring with Ben, and therefore who had kept Ben's presence at the Seattle base from him. But the other man bites his lip instead of asking.

   “I was in training for about the same length of time.” Max tells him, and he turns to look at her, “But I was out in the training yards and assault courses.” The look on her face is proud and a little smug, and it makes Ben shift awkwardly and look away again.

   “Which platoon?” He asks her.

   “Platoon?” She sounds perplexed and he turns back to face her once more. 

   “Yes. Which were you reassigned to?”

   “You were reassigned?” Max asks, dismayed. “You're not Unit 1 anymore?”

   “All X4, 5 and 6 units were reorganized after the escape.” Alec interjects, “No more than two X5s from the same unit were kept together. And the units became identified alphabetically rather than numerically. In 2014 the X5 units became platoons, once the youngest ones had completed basic X5 training and would soon be approaching deployment age.” Max pauses once he finishes his brief explanation before turning back to Ben, looking dismayed.

   “And you were assigned to a platoon?” 

   “Yes. I was assigned to C. X5 C that is, of course.” He glances shyly at his brother and sees the slightly stunned look on his face before he shakes it off.

   “I wasn't reassigned.” She says quietly, clearly conflicted. “So I'm still Unit 1. Zack's still my CO, but he's not yours?”

   “No.” He shakes his head with a small, sad smile.

   “Were any of the Xs you sparred with from...” Her mouth twists sourly, “Your new platoon.”

   “No.” He replies mildly. “But they told me a little about some of the members of X5C, and my CO.” He flicks another shy look Alec's way, this time with a tiny, hopeful smile. His heart soars when he gets a small smile from his brother, matched by an equally shy look.

   “Well,” Max says, having missed the exchange, “It doesn't matter anymore, anyway.” 

   Judging from the dour look on her face, it plainly does matter to her. Just as it matters to Ben and, hopefully, Alec. Not to mention, the rest of their kind. 

   A beeping sound issues from Max's pocket and she pulls out a cell phone. Her face softens as she reads the received message. “What time is it?” She asks.

   “1.25 am.” Alec replies, after glancing at his watch. “You and OC have got the Saturday morning shift tomorrow haven't you?” Max nods and he grimaces sympathetically. 

   “I need to get home before she goes to bed else she'll be up all night wondering.” She says, with a gesture between the three of them. Turning to Ben she asks, “Have you got somewhere to stay? You can sleep on our sofa if you want?” Her face falls when he shakes his head, turning down the offer.

   “I've got a place set up. Thanks.” He doesn't tell her it's in Terminal City, rather than the makeshift bunk that he'd been using before this week, moving from abandoned place to abandoned place. And he doesn't tell her it was Cece who sorted that place for him. “And, I'd like to talk to Alec a bit.” He quickly looks at him, in insecurity, “I mean, if he wants to. If that's ok?” 

   “Sure.” Alec says quietly, “I don't mind.” Ben almost beams at his agreement. 

   “Fine.” Max bites out, and Ben starts at the tone of her voice, looking at her wide-eyed. There's a tightening of dismay in Ben's stomach as he watches her flick a venomous glance at Alec and he glances from her to Alec and back again as she stands up and straightens her jacket.

   He really doesn't want to cause any more problems for them, and he definitely doesn't want to be another reason for Max to be angry at Alec. He doesn't understand why he should be. But then, he doesn't really understand why it is Max so often treats Alec badly anyway. “I'll let you two talk.” She says as she starts to stalk away.

   ' _Let_ them talk?' Ben hears the undertone in her voice – it isn't a turn of phrase. She actually sounds like she thinks she's giving them permission. He feels a rush of defensive anger run through him – why should they need her permission to talk? Why shouldn't he spend time with his brother?

   Half way across the room, Max turns back towards him, “I'll see you tomorrow?”

   He swallows his annoyance enough to nod, “Yeah. I'm sure Alec will show me where to find you.” There's a subtle spite in his tone and words, not enough for Max to register it as purposeful, but enough to prick, and he sees her flinch.

   “Fine.” She says and turns away, stomping from the room. After a moment, the sounds of her boots striking the steps of the stairwell much louder than even a human would be, echo back to them. 

   Sighing, Ben turns to Alec and takes in the fading look of surprise on his features. “What?” Alec shakes his head slightly to dismiss the question, but he gives him a knowing look. Max may not have realized that his spite was on purpose, but Alec clearly had. 

   In all the fretting Ben had done about facing Alec, it hadn't occurred to him how hard it would be to get anything past him. Others might find that intimidating, but for Ben it was a strange relief.

   With Max gone, the silence between them draws out, neither of them sure what to say. Just as it becomes stilted Ben bursts out into another round of apologies, his breath catching a little as his words trip over each other.

   “Don't.” Alec shakes his head. “You've apologized. Repeating it doesn't increase the sincerity or impact. It was pretty clear that you meant it the first half dozen times. ” He makes a weak attempt at a grin. “Even the one at the bar.” Ben gives him a wan smile. 

   “You really don't blame me for escaping?” He asks in a shaky voice.

   “No.”

   “Cece...” His voice breaks and Ben has to clear his throat before trying again. “Cece said it was because you're a CO and expect to have your orders followed, the way we followed Zack's.”

   “She's right.” Alec nods slightly. 

   “I didn't think anyone outside of our unit would see it that way.”

   “Oh, I think we all pretty much see it that way. It's just that some don't want to accept it.” Alec sighs, rubbing his temple. “The fact that some of the Xs from your unit didn't try to escape just validates that point of view.” Ben flushes with guilt and shame.

   “We didn't want to leave them behind. When Zack gave the order and they didn't obey, he was furious. But we couldn't force them, even if there'd been time.” Ben speaks quick and firm, but he can hear the desperation in his voice for Alec believe to him. “We didn't _mean_ to leave _anyone_ behind. I don't believe even Zack was thinking beyond stopping them from taking Maxie.”

   “Max?”

   “She was seizing badly, again. And it had only been a few weeks since they had taken Jack.” He explains. “Max, she saw what they did to him. We were scared that it would happen to more of us. And she was Zack's favorite, he was never going to let them take her.”

   “And you?”

   Ben pauses for a long moment before confessing, “I would have never let them either. I chose her.” He leans forwards in his seat, hands clasped together. “I'm sorry.”

   “Don't apologize for choosing to save someone.”

   “But I...you...I left...” Ben stutters, a wave of guilt rising in his throat yet again. He half reaches unconsciously towards the other man. When his hands are taken gently, he looks up in awe.

   “Enough.” Alec orders quietly. “You've apologized sincerely and repeatedly and you've explained what happened.”

   “But...”

   “But, nothing. It won't help either of us to go round and round in circles. Will it?”

   “No...?”

   “No.” Alec drops his hands and moves away to stand, and Ben can't stop a small pathetic sound emerging from his throat as he grasps at Alec's jacket. 

   “You don't hate me?” He flushes as he registers the neediness in his tone. “Please, don't hate me.”

   “Hey.” Alec crouches down again. “Hey calm down. I don't hate you.” He covers Ben's hands, loosening his grip.

   “Really?”

   “Really.” Alec says, lacing their fingers together. “I promise, Ben. I don't hate you.”

   Ben lets out a sob of relief and thankfulness. That simple assertion was more than he'd ever hoped for. 

   Maybe...maybe now he can hope, that one day his brother will feel more for him than an absence of hate. 

   Maybe.

   Oh, Blue Lady, please.


	24. Max

   Letting herself into her apartment, Max leans back against the door for a moment, sighing and allowing her shoulders to slump.

   “That you, Boo?” Cindy calls out from her bedroom.

   “Nah, it's your imagination!” Max calls back.

   “Ha ha.” OC deadpans as she comes through her doorway. She stops and eyes Max where she's leaning against the door. “So... how did it go?”

   “Fine.”  
   “Fine?”   
   “Uh huh.”

   “Riiight.” Cindy purses her lips and shakes her head, “Come on girl, you've gotta give more than that. Brother Ben comes back from the dead and sends you and your boy into a tailspin and all you can say is that things went 'fine'?”

   “He's not my boy.” The usual, automatic rejoinder prompts Cindy to roll her eyes with exasperation.

   _“Fine_. You and _Alec_ were sent into a tailspin.”

   “Well, Alec seems fine with everything. Of course, you know what he's like.” Max pushes away from the door and goes to the fridge. 

   “Good at covering and hiding his feelings?”

   “No. Well, yes...he is,” Max grimaces as she takes a bottle of beer out and flicks the top off with her thumb. “But I meant that nothing ever bothers him too much.” She finds herself on the receiving end of a disbelieving look. “What?”

   “Are we forgetting about Rachel?”

   Wincing, Max alters her statement, “Ok, so he tries not to let anything bother him.” That much is true, though he isn't always successful, and it doesn't exactly jibe with how she prefers to see him. Plus, she'd rather not think about Alec's reckless and downright suicidal actions when Rachel Berrisford resurfaced from the murkiness of his re-indoctrinated memory. She shudders slightly as she recalls the frightening moments when she'd heard his voice echoing down the corridor for Robert Berrisford to “Do it!” before she slid into the room to see him restrained and staring down the barrel of a gun, when he could have broken free and taken said gun easily and in mere seconds.

   “Sounds like someone else I know.” Cindy's words drag her suddenly back to the present and it takes her a moment to work out what she's implying.

   “I am nothing like him!”

   “Uh huh.”

   “I'm not!” She feels her face go blank in response to the unwelcome comparison. After a moment, she realizes that what she's doing is exactly the thing that Alec so often does, and which is one of the things that so often pisses her off. She drops the blank mask and turns away with a huff.

   “So, what all did the three of ya talk about?” The older woman makes no attempt to apologize for her almost intrusive curiosity as she follows Max to the sofa. “And where did ya' go?”

   “We met up at the Space Needle.” She tells her, “Alec told us to go on ahead and he joined us after about... I don't know, forty five minutes or so.”

   “That was good of him, to let you have time alone with Ben first.”

   “Yeah, I suppose.” The lack of enthusiasm in Max's voice is clear. 

   “I guess Pretty Boy needed some time to pull himself together.” Cindy muses. Confused, Max looks at her questioningly. “He looked pretty freaked when that hook up o' his dropped Ben's name.”

   “Did he?”

   “Oh, yeah. OC ain't sure which a yous was the most shaken. I mean, you went pale an' all,” She tugs at her hair thoughtfully, “But when Cece dragged Ben in? Damn, if our boy didn't go white as milk.” 

   Putting aside her bottle, Max has to stop to think on that. She'd been so caught up in her own disbelieving reaction that she hadn't thought of how Alec had been reacting. As she flexes both hands she's startled to feel a tinge of strain in her left. Looking at it she sees some faint bruising along each side and across the knuckles. She frowns, trying to remember how it happened, lifting it to get a closer look.

   “Whoa.” Max lets Cindy gently take her hand to look at it herself. “I knew you had a grip on each other, but OC didn't realize that either of you might a been holding on that hard.”  
Blinking in surprise, Max looks from her hand, to Cindy, and back again. “Alec did this?” She frowns again staring at her hand as she feels her friend look at her in astonishment.

   “Ya don't remember?”

   “Err...no?”

   “When that girl Natalie was babbling about the importance of family and forgiveness, the two of you were holding onto each other's hands like you might break into pieces if you let go.” Cindy explains softly. “Not really surprising, considering the shock you two had just had.”

   “Guess not.” Max murmurs. She's a little stupefied that not only had one of them reached out to the other in their distress, but the other had returned the hold so desperately. She has no idea which of them reached out first, and she supposes that it doesn't really matter. They're quiet for a few minutes as Max finishes her beer.

   “So what did you and Ben talk about?” Cindy asks.

   “He didn't want to get into what happened until Alec got there.” Max says with a flash of remembered annoyance. “I don't really see why Ben was so bothered about Alec being there though. Or why he thought he had to explain anything to him. He's my brother after all, not Alec's.”

   “What reason did he give?” Cindy asks diplomatically.

   “He said that Alec deserved to know, and that he didn't want to go over it twice.”

   “Was what happened to him traumatic?”

   “Yes.”

   “Well, I guess it makes sense that he'd only want ta go though the tale once. And he's more likely to know who has a right to know, and why, than anyone, yeah?”

   “I suppose.”

   “So what did you two talk about instead then?”

   “We talked about...” Max shifts uncomfortably and clears her throat, “About what happened in the woods. How I'd failed to free him – but he said that I hadn't failed, that what I did should have been enough. We argued a little about who was at fault. Then I...” Her face screws up in embarrassment as she confesses, “Kind of broke down and cried all over him.”

   “Again, hardly surprising.” The older woman says, patting her lightly on the arm. They sit quietly for a few moments as Max gets over her slight embarrassment – she hates breaking down, hates even the thought of it. She prefers to be in control of her self at all times.

   Clearing her throat, she continues her summary of what happened earlier that night. “Once Alec got there, Ben told us some of what happened when he was back at Manticore.”

   “Did he say anything about why he was... you know?”

   “Yes.” Max brightens slightly, “He said they found a brain tumor that had caused his psychosis.” Then she droops, “I should have taken him to see a doctor when I found him. Why didn't I think of that? Why the hell did I think I could possibly fix him just by just telling him that what he was doing was wrong?”

   “Hey now, Boo, don't go knocking yourself down. It's not like you had a lotta time to help him, now is it?”

   “But I should have...”

   “And maybe you would have, if you'd a had a chance. But you said it ya'self, Lydecker was closing in on yous, and ya both panicked.”

   “But...” 

   “But not'in'.” Cindy tells her firmly, giving her arm a shake, “Ben said it wasn't your fault, Alec said it wasn't your fault, and OC is saying it wasn't your fault. And dat's an end to it. Aiight?”

   Max looks at her best friend, taking in the fierce look in her eyes. She remembers the stern look in Ben's eyes when he told her that she wasn't to blame, and the soft understanding in Alec's when she confided what Ben had asked her to do. Maybe they were right, but she couldn't stop thinking that she should have done more.

   “So, they sorted him out then?” OC asks, interrupting her guilty thoughts. 

   “Yeah. They took care of the tumor and everything.” Max sighs. “If only he hadn't of had to go through the re-indoctrination that came after.” She bites her lip. “It sounded as if what he went through was a lot different from what they put me through. I don't know why.”

   “What exactly is re-indoctrination anyway?” Cindy inquires, brow furrowed in confusion. “You mentioned it before, after you met Sam.” 

   Scrubbing her hands over her face, Max hesitates as she thinks of how to explain it. In the end she chickens out. “Ask me again in the daytime. I don't think you'll sleep too good if I tell you now.” She tells her friend.

   “Aiight.” OC agrees easily, taking her word for it. “So, Pretty Boy Two, - or is he Pretty Boy One? Which one a them is the oldest? - he's back to his old self then?”

   “I don't know which.” Max says with a slight giggle. She hopes Ben is the oldest, not Alec. Then she smiles brightly. “And yes, he seems like the Ben I remember from before the escape. I didn't see the same darkness and confusion in his eyes.”

   “That's good.”

   “That's brilliant.” Max can't hide her happiness at the thought. “I can't believe I get my brother back, just like he used to be. I felt so guilty about...” She trails off as her happiness switches to anger, “That bitch Renfro used his death against me. And all the time he was right there, close by. She purposefully kept him away from the training yards, so I wouldn't see him and realize she was lying.”

   “What was she hoping to achieve?”

   “Who knows. I think she got off on tormenting me. It sounds like tormenting Xs was one of her hobbies. I guess Ben and I were just her latest projects.”

   “Well, she can't hurt any of you anymore.”

   “No.” Max smiles viciously, “She can't.” It's true: Renfro is dead and gone. She can't hurt Max anymore, or anyone she cares about. 

   “So, where is he? Has he got a place in Seattle?” The other woman asks curiously.

   “He said so, yeah.” She scowls, “I offered for him to sleep here, but he wanted to go back to his place. And to stay and talk to Alec some more, alone.”

   “Speaking of Alec, how's he taking Ben's return?”

   “I don't know exactly.” Max answers. “He seemed pretty steady. But that doesn't exactly mean much. He kept trying to calm Ben down, same as me.” She picks at the label on her empty beer bottle. “Ben had this kind of breakdown, from flashbacks, and he wouldn't let me get near him.” She glowers, “But Alec just swept right up and grabbed hold of him.”

   “And?”

   “And got through to him, calmed him down.” She feels a flash of hurt and anger go through her, and her fists clench as she remembers feeling helpless when Ben rejected her attempts to reach him, and then how he almost immediately reacted to Alec.

   “That's good, right?”

   “I suppose.” She knows she sounds petulant, that she should be thankful that Alec was able to calm Ben so well. “It's just...”

   “Yes?”

   “Ben's my brother.” She blurts out. “Mine, not Alec's. He should react like that to _me_. He should have wanted to come and sleep here, with me, not to stay and talk with Alec.”

   “Boo.” Cindy sighs, taking her hand and pulling her around to face her. “Why are you so angry? Just because he's your brother doesn't mean he can't be Alec's brother, too.”

   “But...”

   “No. There's no reason he can't be good with the both a' you.” Cindy says firmly. “I mean, surely you want him to be able to rely on someone other than you?”

   “There's you.” Max replies stubbornly. 

   “He doesn't know me.”

   “But he will.”

   “Yes. If he's planning on sticking around then, yes, he will. But that's no reason to restrict his interactions with other Xs, especially Alec.” 

   Max pouts. She knows that what Cindy is saying is reasonable, and that she's being exactly the opposite, but... Damn it, Ben's her brother, her unit. He doesn't belong with the C platoon, and he doesn't belong with Alec. She hears Cindy sigh.

   “Look, you know OC's got ya back. She knows that Ben being back is good for her girl, Max. But she can also see that his return can be good for our boy. Why can't you?”

   “What do you mean?”

   “They're twins.”

   “Clones.” Max snaps the denial. 

   “Fine, clones. Which means that there's always going to be something there between them. Why shouldn't Alec have someone to rely on?”

   “He has me.” Max says hotly.

   “Does he?” Cindy asks severely, “Because OC hasn't seen all that much proof a' that.” Max flinches. Cindy softens and returns to her previous point. “And who better to understand Alec, than Ben?”

   “But Sam and I didn't...”

   “That's you and Sam. We're talking about Ben and Alec. They should be able to choose it for themselves. Isn't that part of what being free from Manticore means?”

   “I guess.” Max mutters through a pinched expression. Cindy sighs again.

   “Is he planning to stick around?

   “I don't know. We didn't get that far. Hopefully, he's planning to.” She smiles as a sudden thought comes to her, “He could work at Jam Pony and go on EO missions with me.”

   “What about Alec?” Cindy asks with a frown.

   “What about him?” Max asks, distractedly, already imagining how great it will be to have Ben at her back instead of the never-shuts-up Alec. Someone to stand by her in TC, to take her side against Mole and the others. It won't matter that the other Transgenics don't like her much, not if she's got Ben beside her and Alec to deal with the rest of them.

   And, Ben might still know where the rest of their siblings are. She feels a flash of hurt that Ben had known when she hadn't, but shakes it away. They can send for them now. They can all be together now that Lydecker isn't chasing them and now that Renfro and Manticore are gone. 

   After nearly twelve years, she can finally be surrounded by her family, and her friends, and Cindy and Logan. She smiles brightly at the idea, so caught up in her imaginings she doesn't notice the pensive look that her best friend is giving her, and only gives an absent-minded response to her good-night.

   She can't wait to talk to Ben tomorrow. She hugs herself happily. This is going to change things for the better, finally.


	25. Alec

   Watching the glare of the street light reflecting off of the items on his bedside table, Alec tries not to sigh. It wouldn't exactly fit with the appearance of sleep that he's trying to pull off. He can hear Ben in the other room, also trying to pretend that he's asleep. Whether or not Alec's attempts are fooling the other man, he doesn't know, but Ben's are definitely not working. Not only is his breathing pattern giving him away, but Alec can practically taste the emotions coming off of him, even though he's not in the same room. But he supposes it's not really a surprise that both of them are having trouble falling asleep after the last six hours or so: It's been an emotional joy ride, to put it mildly.

 

   These last few months, he'd just about dealt with the idea that his twin was dead and had gone through a strange sort of grief. He had buried the rational feelings of anger and the irrational feelings of betrayal. Now it turns out that Ben is alive. He doesn't know what to make of the situation or his feelings, and is struggling to cope with the strength of Ben's emotions that keep battering at his shields.

   God, Psy Ops had really done a number on the poor bastard. The question was, why? 

 

   His musings are interrupted by the sounds of his rickety couch, as Ben otherwise silently rises from it. He closes his eyes and listens as the other man creeps across the apartment, through the open bedroom door and over to the wall that Alec's closed eyes face. He hears him slide down into a crouch and waits to see what Ben will do.

   After a never ending ten minutes Alec opens his eyes with a sigh. “What is it?”  
Ben opens and closes his mouth a couple of times before answering. “I just wanted to be sure.”

   “Sure?”

   “That I'm really here. That you're really here.” He looks down, “That you're ok.”

   “Why wouldn't I be ok?” He watches Ben shrug and shift uncomfortably before mumbling something that sounds like 'your files'. “Renfro showed you my 'folder' right?” He asks, referring to what Ben had mentioned earlier about Alec's medical records, mission files and Psy Ops reports.

   “Yeah.” Ben nods and bites his lip.

   “And?” He prompts. “There were photos?”

   “So many.” Ben gasps, clenching his eyes closed. “In damned slide shows. And it wasn't all the photos in your files. No, just the ones of you hurt, or in Psy Ops. And there were so, so many.”

   “Hell.” Alec breathes out. Fucking Manticore. It's just like those bastards to document everything like that, and worse, to use them in such a cold-hearted, cruel way.

   “I keep seeing them. Every night.” Ben confesses. “I keep imagining I was there watching whenever you were hurt. That I kept trying to stop it happening and failing. Or worse, that it was me hurting you.” Alec closes his eyes at the anguish in the other man's voice. He knows what it's like to torture yourself with your own failures and with what ifs, but this sounds excessive. It sounds like the orders of Renfro or one of the Psy Ops doctors. 

   He reopens his eyes to look at Ben where he's huddled across the room. They're never going to get any rest like this, not with Ben distressed and Alec's emotions whirling in response. There's only one thing he can think to do. “Come here.” He orders, flipping the bed covers open and then patting the bed behind him. “Get in.” Ben lifts his head and stares at him in disbelief. “I need sleep, and you're thinking too loud.” Alec says, making light of the offer. “My unit mates used to sneak into each other's racks after lights out to sleep back to back. Didn't yours?” 

   “Sometimes.” Ben nods, before creeping forward slowly, as if he's expecting Alec to change his mind or laugh at him. He moves around the room and slides into the bed, pulling the covers over himself.

   “Shuffle back.” Alec says, doing so himself. He waits a few seconds until Ben does the same, until their backs are pressed lightly together, then moves back another inch. “Now go to sleep.” 

   After a few minutes, he feels Ben slowly relax into the mattress. A few minutes after that, he purposely matches his breathing to his brother's. He then begins a pattern of deep, slow breaths knowing Ben will automatically follow. Once their breathing becomes almost meditation, heartbeats synced in a slow and even rhythm, Alec starts to purr lightly. He can sense Ben's surprise that Alec would employ such a meaningful method to soothe him, but it's not too long until Ben is purring as well.

   It takes a little while, but eventually the warmth of their bodies, the purring, the synced heartbeats and emotional exhaustion work together to pull Ben into sleep. Once he's sure he's settled into true sleep, Alec lets himself follow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Coming awake between one heartbeat and the next, Alec tenses. Before his hand can even reach beneath his pillow for his gun, he knows who it is trying to creep into his apartment. He reaches out to brush a hand against Ben's as the other man makes his own reach for the gun. He's only fifteen seconds behind Alec, not bad.

   Propping himself up on one arm, Alec scrubs at his eyes and calls out. “Give it up, Clara. I woke when you opened the door.” He snorts as he hears her huff. “Come on in here.” He opens his eyes and smiles at Ben's nervous expression.

   “Your sister?” Ben asks him in a shaky whisper.

   “Our sister.” Alec answers before shifting around to sit against the headboard, politely ignoring Ben's reaction to the change in pronoun and the implication of that change. Though he makes a note of the fact that he already knows who Clara is. He watches Clara enter the room a little hesitantly. “Morning Nosy.” He smirks at her as she blushes and shrugs.

   “Morning. I heard what happened last night at Crash.” She explains as she perches on the end of the bed.

   “So instead of heading into TC for your duties and studies, you decided that you just had to come and see for yourself?”

   “Why not?” She shrugs again, unapologetically. She moves into a more comfortable position, curling up at his feet before turning from him to stare at Ben unabashedly. Alec looks from one of them to the other in amusement. Ben is clearly unsure what to make of her calm reaction and discomfited by her staring – he's half curled on his side, and he's got the covers pulled up nearly to his chin like a shield. Clara is completely unconcerned that she's making him feel awkward and self-conscious.

   This is not a situation he could have ever foreseen even before he knew what happened between Max and Ben. He's just glad he hadn't got around to telling Clara that Ben was, supposedly, dead. It would have made her reaction to Ben lot more muddled and pained. Like his.  
He can sense the eddying emotions between the three of them, and knows they can too. They're too close to each other for that not to be the case. It's like some bad New Age joke – three empaths alone in a room. He lets out a snort at the thought. 

   “What?” Clara asks him, and he looks up to see that she and Ben are looking at him in query.

   “Nothing. Just a weird thought.”

   She turns back to Ben and tilts her head thoughtfully. “So, you're X5-493?” Ben flinches.

   “I'm 495 now.” He answers quietly, stuttering a little as he continues, “They, they ch...changed my designation because of the...the th..things I did.” He looks down, shamed, curling into himself slightly. Clara looks to Alec in silent inquiry and he shakes his head, discreetly signing 'Later'.

   Reaching out, he gently places a hand on Ben's arm, squeezing lightly to comfort him. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Clara instinctively doing a similar thing, laying a hand over his ankle. After a long moment, Ben takes a shaky breath and uncurls.

   “So, what's your name?” Clara asks brightly, “Mine's Clara.”

   “Ben.” He replies shyly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   An hour later, Alec pulls his Duke into the TC garage and cuts the engine as Clara climbs from the back. A moment afterwards Ben pulls his Yamaha smoothly in beside him. Putting his sunglasses in his pocket, he ruffles his hair before looking between Ben and Clara. “Are you coming to HQ with us or heading off?” Alec asks his sister.

   “With.” She answers with a grin, eyes glittering in anticipation. Alec sighs and shakes his head.

   “Where do you get this mischief from?”

   “Same place as you, most likely.”

   He sighs and shakes his head again. Why are all his sisters so annoying? His younger sisters all cheek him and drive him nuts with their mischief and their – gah, give him strength – girl issues. The older ones, on the other hand, all want to coddle him. And that goes for both blood and unit sibs. He gives in with poor grace as Clara hooks an arm through his and starts to pull him along.

   “C'mon.” He glances at Ben as they move away and he feels his expression turn speculative as the other man follows them. “Huh, what is it that they say? A problem shared is a problem halved?”

   “What problem?” Clara asks. Alec smirks at her and she narrows her eyes before pinching him.

   “Ow.” He prods her in the ribs in retaliation. “Hey Ben, you know your unit sisters?”

   “Yeah?”  
   “Were any of them ever annoying?”  
   “God, yes.”  
   “Mine, too. But guess what?”  
   “What?”

 

   “So are our blood sisters.” He quickly disconnects his arm from Clara's and dances away.

   “Hey!” Clara gives him a look of offense.

   “What? It's true!” He laughs as she growls at him and quickly takes off for the fire escape. He leads her on a merry chase across the rooftops, Ben loping behind them and watching in bemusement.

   As he lands lightly on the roof of their Command Center, Alec darts across to the roof access door, where he lays in wait. He reaches out to catch her as Clara starts to barrel past him and slings her over his shoulder. 

   “Put me down! Alex!” She squirms and struggles as he carries her down the stairs and they're both laughing as they tumble into the room, catching everyone's notice – just as he intended. They're the center of attention as he launches them over the railing to the lower level, and she squeals as he flips her in his arms during the second they're in the air. 

   Landing neatly on his feet Alec dumps Clara on the old couch placed below the computer platform and moves out of kicking distance. “I hate you.” Clara pouts.

   “Do you? I'll remember that next time you want to raid my wallet then, shall I?” Alec asks with a mocking smile. 

   “Aa-lec.”  
   “Claa-ra.”  
   “I didn't mean it.”

   “Mm hmm? Really?” He raises a sardonic eyebrow, “How much do you want?” 

   “Just fifty.”  
   “Fifty? What for?”  
   “You don't want to know.”

   “Fine.” Alec puffs with mock irritation as he pulls the money out of his wallet and hands it over, “Don't spend it all at once.” Clara sticks her tongue out and flounces up the stairs back to the computer hub. He follows, shaking his head. “Sisters.” He looks up and sees Ben hovering at the top of the stairs where Clara has joined him. 

   Luckily, he'd remembered what Max had said about Ben's childhood fears of the basement and those housed there. He'd taken the precaution to call ahead, so it's just X series in HQ at the moment, like he'd requested. Of course, it's only for Ben's first few hours or so, he doesn't want to indulge his fears, but a steady introduction will help things go smoothly, he hopes.

   The loud entrance that he and Clara made somewhat covered Ben's arrival, but now everyone has properly noticed him. He grimaces as he takes in the poorly hidden curiosity around them. Ben's looking rather pale and nervous at being the focus, but there's no way they could have avoided this. 

   Word of what happened last night at Crash will have made the rounds of Terminal City and its gossipy, bored inhabitants are no doubt buzzing with the news. It's really fucking annoying – just once he'd like something to happen in his life that isn't of interest to the masses.

   As he reaches the top of the stairs, Ben and Clara move back a little out of his way. “Morning.” He says quietly, and gets a chorused response. “Sitrep?” He listens to the reports from the different groups monitoring the media, police and military situations and nods. It's all quiet for once. 

   Turning, he leans over the railing and says to the room at large, “Anything in the progreps that I need to know?” At the replies to the negative, he nods again, “Good. In that case, I'll be in the gym.” He turns to Ben, “I need to assess you.” The other man nods and bites his lip in trepidation. 

   As they pass her, Alec pulls lightly on Clara's braid. “You, training.” She makes a sound of irritation in reply but he knows she'll head there as soon as he's gone – it's her turn to lead the younger X6s in their practice session and, like Alec, she takes her responsibilities seriously.

   They take a long weaving way through the room to exit the building. Alec wants to give those there plenty of time to get a non-intrusive view of his brother. However, he has no intention of letting anyone observe them at the gym – this sparring session is for the two of them only. He has a feeling thatit's going to be rather fraught for a routine assessment and grimaces slightly at the prospect.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Alec rolls away with an angry curse, before striding across the room to kick at a hanging punch bag. “Damn it, Alexander.” He mutters to himself. “Fucking control yourself.” Turning back, he returns to the man he'd left prone on the mat. “I'm sorry.”

   “S'ok.” Ben answers, still wheezing slightly. “I get it.”

   “But...”

   “I get it.” Ben repeats more firmly, as he pushes himself into a sitting position. “You've a right to be angry with me.” He takes the hand that Alec is holding out to him, stumbling a little as he's pulled to his feet. Alec catches him with his other hand against his side, allowing him to lean into him slightly. “And believe me, I was expecting a lot worse than some bruises and sore ribs.”

   “I shouldn't have lost control like that.”

   “That was hardly a loss of control.” Alec opens his mouth to make another denial, or apology, but Ben interrupts him. “It wasn't. A little excess force and a couple of extra punches are nothing.” Alec gives up arguing, he knows that Ben is still carrying around a truck load of guilt and he's unlikely to allow Alec to blame himself for what he sees as justified anger.

   “Well, I think we're finished.” He says instead. “I've got a pretty good idea at where you're at.”

   “Pretty pathetic, huh?” 

   “No.” Alec shakes his head and steps away. “I expected worse to be honest.”

   “I don't think the trainers were all that impressed with my skills.”

   “I don't think anything ever impressed the trainers, or the handlers.” Alec replies, a little bitterly, “Except maybe our kill rates in battle. And even then, it was never quite good enough.”

   “Well, fuck them. I bet most of them were only at Manticore because they couldn't hack real military action.” 

   “True.” Alec acknowledges with a spiteful grin. “I remember this one group of Jarheads that were particularly unimpressed with Staff Sergeant Hackett.”

   “His name was Hackett?” Ben asks, lips twitching.

   “Yup. You can just imagine the things they called and said to him.” Ben snickers and Alec smiles. “We should hit the showers before I drag you to medical. There's some people I want you to meet before we head back to HQ.” Time for a gentle introduction to the Transhumans, before Max manages to drop him in the deep end, either with the over-exuberant Joshua or by having one of her flaming rows with Mole in front of the poor bastard. The last thing Ben needs to see is a 6'4 lizard in a temper looming over his sister. Hell, the last thing anyone needs to see is a 6'4 lizard in a temper looming over their sister. “Come on.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   After lunch Alec leads Ben back towards Command via a meandering route. He can see curious faces peeking out of windows and doorways as they pass.

   “Are you sure you're ready to meet Mole?” He asks, willing to let the other man off and send him elsewhere. Cece is supervising a work crew over in the X Series section and would probably be glad for another pair of hands.

   “Probably not.” Ben answers honestly, “But I should get it over with. Especially as, from what you tell me, I'm likely to witness him and Max arguing sooner rather than later.” Alec hums his agreement.

   When they arrive, the main floor of Command is in that strange state of too-busy-to-talk industry that he's used to seeing whenever Max is around. He stifles a sigh of vexation. He'd really hoped that by now Max might have forged a positive connection with _someone_ other than him and Joshua. 

   Speaking of the stubborn bitch, he can see her leaning over the railing above them, scowling. He sees the moment that she spots him as her scowl deepens. The scowl quickly disappears when she spots his twin. Charming.

   “Hey, Maxie.” He pastes on a grin as he climbs the stairs.

   “Don't call me 'Maxie'.” She snaps automatically.

   “Hey, Maxie.” Ben echoes his greeting, “Oh, sorry.”

   “I didn't mean you.”

   “Huh?” 

   Alec glances back at Ben to see him looking at her in seeming confusion.

   “You can call me that.” She says softly. 

   “No,” Ben says slowly, deliberately glancing around beneath lowered lashes, “That's ok.”

   “You've always called me that.” Max completely misses his subtle cue and Alec rolls his eyes at her obliviousness. Once he reaches the platform, he moves behind her and mouths at Ben not to bother. He's fully aware that everyone is looking at them, even though they're play-acting discretion, and are ready to judge Ben on his behavior, as they have Max. Ben shrugs at her non-committally as he comes up beside them. 

   Leaving them to talk, Alec walks over to Dix and Luke, “So, where's Lizardbrain?”

   “He was at Armory B.” Luke answers, “Checking the new acquisitions, of course.”

   “Of course.”

   “But he should be back here soon. He's got a list of guns he wants to add to our armaments.”

   “Do you think he'll ever decide we've got enough?” Alec asks, already knowing the answer is no. Luke just snorts.

   “I'd like to see you ask him.”

   “Do I look stupid?” Alec looks at him with his best idiot-grunt impression. He turns around quickly when he senses a shift in the emotions around them, to see Ben fidgeting in discomfort as Max stares beseechingly at him. Whatever she's said is not to the liking of their fellow Xs. “Hey.” He calls, catching their attention and gesturing for Ben to come over. 

   Relief washes over Ben's face for a second before he practically materializes next to Alec. “Yeah?”

   “I want you to meet these guys. This is X3A-561 – Luke, and X3A-241 – Dix.” Luke nods politely, but distantly, whereas Dix grins brightly and holds out his hand to shake.

   “Hi! You must be Ben. It's great to meet you. Welcome to Terminal City.”

   “Umm, yeah. Hi.” Ben looks a little dazed as he shakes his hand. Alec smirks, Dix has that effect on people.

   “X3?” Max interjects, confused. “I thought you were Anomalies.”

   “We are. X3A - X3 Anomaly.” Luke answers coolly.

   “Oh, right.” Max flushes and looks away. They all ignore her faux pas.

   “Luke and Dix are usually here in HQ.” Alec breaks the awkward silence. “Sometimes I think they get withdrawal if they're away from the glow of a monitor for too long.” He grins, patting Luke on the shoulder. “And now, the approaching stench of cigars heralds the arrival of the Transhuman that is the 'Sunshine of Command'.”

   “Fuck off, Kitty.” The gruff voice of Mole floats up to them, and Alec turns to see him glaring up at him, his ubiquitous stogey in his mouth. “Irritating brat.”

   “Aww, don't say that. You'll break my sensitive heart.” Alec pretends to swoon against Ben, using his dramatics to give Ben an excuse to be close to him when the intimidating Mole arrives. 

   “I see you've brought in another one of you damned felines.” Mole eyes Ben, outwardly unimpressed, but Alec knows he's observing them both closely. Ben's hand is twisted in the back of Alec's jacket, and he notes to himself, that it's a good job he decided not to wear one of his leathers today.

   “Mole, this is Ben. Designation X5-495.”

   “5?” Mole questions with a raised... well not eyebrow, eyebrow region?

   “They changed it.” Alec shrugs. “Ben this is Mole. DAC-261. Designed for desert warfare, hence,” He gestures up and down at Mole, “You know, giant lizard.” Alec just grins at him when Mole gives him the finger. “Love you, too.” Mole grunts and rolls his eyes, turning away in favor of a stack of reports. 

   “So, that's Mole.” He turns slightly towards Ben, reaching behind his back to loosen the other man's grip on him. “I told you. He's just a delight and a huge softy. Wouldn't you agree, Max?” He smirks as she gives him a disbelieving look.

   “Moron.” She snorts. He flutters his lashes and blows her a kiss, to which she hits him on the shoulder, as usual.

   “Now.” Alec claps his hands, “I was thinking.” He pouts in mock hurt for a moment when Max mutters about him not hurting himself. “Ben may as well bring his stuff into TC. Where have you been keeping it?” 

   “I've left most of it at the abandoned place I've been staying outside Seattle.” Ben tells them, “And just bringing what I needed when I came into the city.”

   “Paperwork?” 

   “Got none. Manticore took what I had on me and I can't remember where I left my other sets.” Ben looks down in embarrassment.

   “Well then, why don't you and Max head out of the city and get your stuff? And I'll sort out some paperwork for you. What do you say?”

   “Sounds good to me.” Max replies, perking up. “Ben?” He hesitates slightly before answering, less brightly.

   “Sure.”

   “Where will you get his papers?” Max asks Alec. For some strange reason she sounds wary. He frowns.

   “Same place mine came from. I'll go over and get the details of his contact from your Logie Bear.”

   “Don't call him that.” She snaps, punching his shoulder again. Alec senses more than sees Ben flinch in response. “C'mon Ben. I want to be back before dark. I want you to come to Crash and meet my girl Cindy properly.” She doesn't wait for him and is already heading down the stairs when he turns to Alec with an almost pleading look.

   “You'll be fine. I'll be at Crash.” Alec murmurs. “And you should spend time with her.” Ben scrunches his face but nods, before moving swiftly to catch up with her.

   Alec watches them go, pensively. He's a little surprised how unwilling Ben was to go with Max, and how he seems to be clinging to Alec. Is it out of guilt? Or is it because they're twins and they've been apart so long. Or is it because of something Psy Ops did to him? 

   God, he hopes it wasn't Psy Ops. They don't need to start worrying about something like that on top of everything else. It'll just open the door to worries about what they might have done to some of the others, Alec included.

   Renfro. She always had to make things difficult for them. Even from beyond the grave, she's still screwing them over.


	26. Reactions

   Stumbling somewhat gracefully out of the bathroom, Clara finds herself the center of hungry attention from her room-mates. She freezes, “What?”

   “Guess who turned up in Seattle last night?” One of the girls asks her with relish.

   “Who?”

   “Your brother.”

   “So?” Clara looks at her nonplussed. “Which one?” Why is another one of her unit mates turning up, news? 

   “The treacherous one.” 

   “Huh?”

   “The 09er.” One of the other girls explains. “The Commander's twin.” Her mouth drops open for a split second – ' _Oh, not a unit sib then'_ , she thinks faintly – before she pulls herself together. She's an alpha, highly regarded among her peers, she can't show too much weakness. 

   “How do you know it was him?”

   “How many X5's called Ben who look just like 494 are there?” Is the mocking answer. At a sharp look from Clara the speaker drops her eyes submissively.

   Another of the girls speaks up, dispelling the sudden tension. “It was at Crash. When they got into TC, some of the X5s who were there told others about what occurred at the club. Everyone knows now, apparently.”

   Joy, that means everyone'll be watching her and her family, probably for weeks, to see what happens. “Did any of you get the full story by any chance?” She listens to the disjointed story and tries to pick out the facts from the speculation. “Right. Well, thank you for telling me.” 

   There's a slight bite to her words and the others shift uncomfortably. They hadn't really been doing her a favor, they'd wanted to see what she knew and how she would react. 

   There's a long pause before she looks at them with one eyebrow raised in that sarcastic, superior officer manner that she's picked up from Alec. “Don't you all have places to be?” They beat a hasty retreat, murmuring respectful agreement.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Elsewhere in the city, Original Cindy also stumbles out of her bathroom, somewhat less gracefully, and rubs at the sleep in her eyes as she yawns widely.

   “You up, Boo?” She calls to her friend. Receiving no answer she ducks her head into Max's room. It's empty. Shrugging, she makes her way to the kitchen area.

   As she thinks about the previous night, she reflects on the surprising revelation about Ben. She had known that Manticore was all with the technology and medicine and shit, but she hadn't thought that they could cheat death like that. After what she'd learned about Zack though, maybe she shouldn't have been surprised.

   Anyway, what does it matter? Zack's alive, and Ben's alive, too. Makes you wonder though, maybe she should expect the dead sister to turn up at some point? 

   She's gonna cross her fingers that nothing's going to come up that will get between Max and Ben, like it had with Max and Zack. She remembers the way Max's joy at Zack's return had turned sour when she'd had to send him away with no memory, to protect Logan. She doesn't want to see that pain and disappointment kicking her Boo again.

   Of course, if it does, she'll be there for her girl like she was before. Only, it won't just be Max that would be hurt this time, but Alec too. Because, even if it doesn't wound him emotionally to loose Ben, she knows that it would destroy any chance of friendship between him and Max. And she doesn't want to see that happen.

   Thinking of Alec, she frowns slightly as she sips her morning coffee. Things are good between them, plenty of banter and good natured teasing. But, she has the feeling that somewhere, somehow she's lost his trust if not his friendship – and it's a surprise to her how much the realization hurts. He's been kinda distant for weeks, something made all the clearer as she'd seen him interact with some of the other Transgenics. She hates to think it's because of something she's done or said, but she doesn't always know what is likely to hurt his feelings. It's the same with Max. Their childhood makes them tough, but so very vulnerable at the same time.

   She's going to hope too, that Max doesn't spoil any attempts that Ben and Alec make to forge a relationship. 

_“Ben's my brother. Mine, not Alec's. He should react like that to me. He should have wanted to come and sleep here, with me, not to stay and talk with Alec.”_

   Cindy can still hear the jealousy in Max's voice when she'd burst out with that, and it makes her wince. Because that's the thing isn't it? Ben _is_ Alec's brother, and Ben obviously _does_ react to Alec as a brother, maybe even as a twin. She doesn't even know if Ben thinks of Max like a sister, Zack hadn't really seemed to after all.

   Things have just gotten way more complicated for her Boo, and for Alec, and inevitably for Cindy herself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Logan sighs as Max leaves and the false smile drops from his face. God, what a mess.

   Max's psychotic 'brother', the sociopathic Alec's 'twin', isn't as dead as he should be. Wonderful. She, of course, is thrilled with Ben's return, but then she tried to protect Ben when she found out what he was doing. If Lydecker hadn't have caught up with him, she would have tried and failed to help him and he would have just carried on killing.

   Why hadn't Manticore killed him and left him dead? He dreads to think of what they intended to use a delusional psychopath for. 

   Banging his fists down on the desk, Logan shakes his head. Poor Max, after everything, it's hardly surprising that she'd want to believe that ridiculous story of Ben's that Manticore had 'fixed' him. Like a naughty puppy. He snorts with dark amusement.  
It's all rather a convenient excuse isn't it? 

_'Oh Max, I was ill. I had a brain tumor, and it made me do bad things. But that pseudo-military organization that tortured and brainwashed us as children, trying to turn us into perfect little killers? They sorted it all out. I'm all better now.'_

_'Oh Ben, I knew it wasn't your fault. It was all Manticore's fault. I'm so glad those evil scientists made everything all right.'_

   He snorts again. Oh, he believes Ben was re-indoctrinated, but a psychotic killer is just what Manticore wanted, as long as he was under their control. But of course, he's not under their control anymore is he? And when he starts killing, what then? Is Max going to stop him? Logan doesn't think so.

   So one of the other Transgenics will be called on to protect them all by taking him out, and Max will react badly, and then they'll react badly in return. And with White after her, it will put Max in more danger. That is, of course, assuming that Ben doesn't just kill her himself.

   And what about Alec? He's already been mistakenly arrested for Ben's killings once. The police hadn't yet known about the bar-codes being associated with Manticore, but how long would it have taken White to find out? He and Max could have both been caught, surrounded by trigger happy sector police. The younger man may not be Logan's favorite person, but he doesn't want to see him killed or tortured by White and his cronies. 

   God, what a mess.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Watching Alec stride out of Command with Ben trailing him, Clara can sense every pair of eyes present moving one by one to fix on her, where she's standing at the edge of the computer hub. It's a contrast to the indulgent way that they'd all watched her and Alec's loud entrance and the subsequent sibling banter. This attention is as hungry as that which she received from her room-mates earlier this morning, and just as discomfiting.

   Taking a deep breath, she lifts her head and walks proudly down the stairs. She has a training session to lead and she has no intention of letting the situation or the attention of the others put her off or force her to run.

   As she leaves the building, heading in the direction of the hall designated for physical training, she thinks about Ben. She'd met all of her other older, surviving siblings by the time she was seven. It was strange to suddenly meet another one, one who she thought she would never get to meet.

   He'd been terribly shy this morning, repeatedly looking to Alec for reassurance. It was almost as if he expected to wake up and find it wasn't real. Or as if he felt he didn't deserve to be there with the two of them. Clara hadn't known what to make of his behavior until Alec took the opportunity, while the other man was in the bathroom, for a quick explanation in sign language: Ben had been captured by Manticore nearly a year ago.

   Psy Ops. Re-indoctrination. It quickly became obvious to her that they'd had their claws in his psyche. Bastards. Sure, it's good that he's no longer psychotic but it's pretty clear that they'd gone above and beyond what was necessary in Ben's treatment. Where the entire Manticore population was aware that Alec had spent six months in Psy Ops because Ben had done _something_ that had pissed Manticore off even more than the escape, five minutes around Ben, when he's around Alec, should be enough to conquer any thoughts of vengeance, because he was – he is – needy. Needy in a way that no other Transgenic that she's ever met is. He looks at Alec like he's the center of his Universe. It's worrying, and more than a little unnerving.

   She'll have to talk about it with Alec later, because right now she needs to put on an untroubled mask to face her peers. Taking a deep breath she lifts her chin and pushes open the door to the training hall.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   When Cindy and Max meet up for a mid morning snack break, the older woman is pleased to see her Best Boo in a brilliant mood – eyes bright and smile wide. It's been a long time since she's seen her look so happy. It's amazing what difference some good news and the lifting of some guilt can have on somebody's personality.

   She listens to Max ramble on about how pleased Logan was for her, when she told him about Ben, and how they should get Ben a job at Jam Pony.

   “Do you think he'll want to work there?” Cindy asks, “What with...”

   “Alec?” Max interrupts, “If it's a problem for Ben having Alec around then I'm sure Alec can get a job somewhere else.”

   “I was going to say Normal.” She hadn't. She was going to point out how twins tend to try and avoid being lumped together by getting different jobs and interests. But, on second thought, it might not be a good idea to remind Max that most people would consider Alec to have a stronger claim on Ben than her. “It might be awkward to see Normal fawning over Alec. Or worse, what if he decides to do the same with Ben. Might be a bit much for the boy.” Which is true enough. “And maybe he's already got a job anyway.”

   “Oh.” Max frowns. “I didn't think of that.”

   They eat quietly for a few moments before Max changes the subject to Eyes Only missions. Cindy frowns as she listens, but Max doesn't notice. She can understand Max wanting to include Ben, but it really does sound like she's intending to drop Alec in Ben's favor. Which is unfair to both men, and makes no sense considering Alec's greater experience in such things. Also, surely it's up to Logan who goes on these missions?

   Remembering the way Ben had looked at Alec the previous night, she's not all that sure he'd go along with Max, if she did decide on such a course. Which would certainly make him look good to the other Xs, but it would make Max look bad for trying.

   Clearly, Ben is desperate for the brotherly relationship with Alec that Manticore had deprived them of. Cindy hopes that Max doesn't allow her jealousy to come between them. Because truthfully, having seen how he could barely keep his eyes off Alec, even when he'd been holding Max, she's not sure that he'd choose Max. And that would break her girl's heart even more than killing him had.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   “Hey, Logie.” Alec's sudden appearance next to him makes Logan drop his cup, and he looks down to watch it hit the floor, expecting to see coffee spilling everywhere. Alec catches the cup and doesn't even flinch as the scalding hot drink splashes over his hand. “Oops.”

   “Alec.” Logan sighs deeply before reaching for a cloth. You would think he'd be used to it by now, being startled by silent footed X5s. “What do you want?” 

   With wide-eyed innocence Alec exclaims, “Can't I visit a buddy without wanting something?” When Logan just stares at him sardonically, he drops the act with a sigh. “Fine. I was after the details of your forger. The one Max used to do my papers.”

   “For Ben?” Logan asks. They're intending to get him papers already? He only turned up last night.

   “Yeah. Max told you, huh?”

   “She came by this morning before work. Gave me the summarized account.”

   “Manticore weirdness strikes again.” Alec boosts himself up to sit on the counter. “Kinda wish he'd have turned up before Max told me he was dead. I was just getting used to the idea, now I have to deal with him not being dead.” Logan is surprised, Alec's words are rather more open than he'd expect. “But then, they might have arrested him instead of me, and we'd have had to pretend to be triplets.”

   “Won't you have to do that anyway?” Logan asks, referencing the fact that Alec cleared his name by 'proving' he had a twin and was out of the country at the time. “If the two of you are spotted together?”

   “Oh, no. It's much more complicated than that.” Alec smirks. “Apparently, we have an older brother who looks just like us and is a close enough genetic match that we could be triplets. And he also has a bar-code tattooed on his neck, like the rest of us, and which is only one digit different to mine and Ben's.” 

   “That sounds...”

   “Yeah, I know. So if the cops go for one of us, I'd need to somehow make them think that I used to think it was Ben who did it but now I know it's this fictional brother.” Logan watches Alec rub the back of his neck, frowning in irritation or confusion or something. “Which is gonna sound weird. But then it's all pretty snafu.”

   Logan hums non-committally. He doesn't see how a psychopath coming back from the dead is situation normal, but fucked up fits perfectly.

   “So he's sticking around?”

   “I assume so.” Alec shrugs, “I can't see Max letting him go. Can you?”

   “Guess not. And you? Do you really think it's a good idea to let him just wander around free? Shouldn't you keep him, I don't know, in some kind of brig?”

   There's a long pause before Alec lifts his head to look at him, and Logan shivers at the cold look on his face. “I beg your pardon?” The polite inquiry sounds extremely ominous when accompanied by such a look. “What exactly are you implying?”

   “You... you know what I'm implying.” Logan has to clear his throat before he can continue, “After what he did, you can't believe he should be left free to do it again. With White causing trouble, Ben can put all of you in danger.” 

   Sliding down from the counter, Alec moves closer to him, and the hairs along his arms and on the back of his neck stand on end in response to the casual menace in Alec's posture.

   “First of all.” Alec says in a low, steady voice, “He was suffering a mental health episode, a psychotic break. He cannot be held accountable for what he did.”

   “But...”

   “Unless of course you think that a Transgenic shouldn't be treated the same as an Ordinary?” 

   A clear hesitation before Logan stutters out a “No” causes Alec's eyes to darken angrily. 

   “Second of all, the root of his psychosis was diagnosed and fully addressed. He is no longer delusional, and will not be repeating his actions.”

   “He killed...!”

   “I know.” Alec interrupts him, growling, and Logan's stomach clenches with fear. “I know exactly what he did, in nightmarish detail, Manticore made sure of that. If anybody, other than his victims has a right to judge him, it's me.” He steps forwards again, forcing Logan to retreat until he's pressed against the wall, heart pounding erratically. “Thirdly, Ben is a Transgenic. If anybody is going to concern themselves with his actions or with stopping him, it is us. **Not you**. Do you understand?”

   “Y...yes.”

   “Good.” Alec smiles darkly, teeth glinting and Logan could almost believe that his canines were too long and too sharp. “Now, we won't speak of this again. And you will not even _hint_ at your beliefs to Max, will you?”

   “No.” Logan chokes out, nearly too scared to breath. It is only when Alec moves away that he starts to gasp. 

   “Oh and by the way. We're Air Force, so it's a stockade, not a brig.” With that, Alec leaves, slamming the door hard enough that Logan swears the entire house shakes.

   Staggering out of the kitchen, Logan half trips onto the old sofa. He sits there shaking until his heart and breathing steady out. He'd forgotten just how dangerous Alec was – stupid of him, very, very stupid. He's shocked at Alec's reaction to Logan's concerns, he can't believe someone as wary as Alec can so easily have been taken in by Ben's story. He expected it from Max, but not Alec.

   Swiping his hands over his face, he stands and heads towards his computer. He needs to check the files he hacked from Manticore. Maybe there will be something in them about Ben, and Alec. He needs to find proof that he's right, to show Alec that he's right, and to protect Max.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   The mood in Terminal City is one of watchful curiosity. The O'Niners had caused the other Transgenics a great deal of pain and misery over the years, and that kind of thing isn't so easily forgiven. Especially, when the 09er X5-452 has made it clear, by her words and by her actions, that she thinks that her status as an escapee makes her better than the rest of them. It rankles all the more when those who suffered more than most, if they survived, went on to be among their most highly ranked, experienced and respected soldiers.

   Out of all of the 09 escapees, the one known as Ben had caused his double the greatest amount of suffering. So, it makes sense that he would now be viewed with the most wariness and dislike. But... he had been brought into Command by Alexander, his betrayed twin, himself. And not a week before that, it turns out that he'd been led into to Terminal City by Cece, one of Alec's closest friends. 

   In the hours since the news of his arrival began to spread around the sector, some of the very small number who know more about him have come forward to share their knowledge. It has come out that he'd been recaptured just months before Manticore was revealed; that he had suffered the prolonged attentions of Madame Renfro herself; that after brutal re-indoctrination he'd thrown himself back into training, eager to learn; and that he'd behaved respectfully to all Transgenics he'd interacted with. 

   The information from the single Psy Ops and the sole medical officer who had known he was at the base means that even the most hostile of them is now having a problem blaming him for his actions over the previous two years. Their wariness now is focused on the fact that the Manticore staff had gone to so much trouble to keep his presence a secret.  
So, the residents of Terminal City will reserve judgment for now. They gave Max a chance, at Alec's request, and she has squandered it. The question is, will Ben do the same?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note:
> 
>    Logan's thoughts about Max and Ben might not seem very fair, but remember we don't know what Max told him had happened - whether she said that she'd killed Ben to stop Lydecker getting him. So he's free to think what he wants about Ben's death.
> 
>    Max lied to Logan after she found out that the first Seattle victim wasn't Ben, she was going to let him think that it was – it was only the second body turning up that forced her to admit it was Ben who killed them. We don't even know if she would have gone after Ben if Logan hadn't demanded she do something. 
> 
>    After she said she would take care of Ben, Logan called Lydecker anyway, he didn't trust her to deal with the situation. He was supposed to have been at least halfway in love with her at that point.
> 
>  
> 
> Author's note 2: Cindy's thoughts of 'the dead sister' – i.e. Tinga.
> 
>    Though it would be relatively easy to bring Tinga back to life, I'm not going to.  
> As far as I can tell, out of all the 'named' Xs that died before the Seattle base was cauterized, the only ones who have to stay dead are Seth, X5R-206 and X5R-211. The latter two because they were euthanized by Manticore. Seth fell from the Space Needle, I can't see how that kind of damage can be undone.
> 
>    Since the base fell, any of those killed by White, or others assigned to, or the Sector Police, also need to stay dead. Those captured alive and sent for 'testing' by the NSA could be alive.  
> Lane (X5R-600) blew himself up near or in Vatican City. He probably needs to stay dead. I think you'd have to ignore his mission to keep him alive.
> 
>    The main consideration with saving them is whether it's too much or too many fixes.


	27. In the Fold

   Zooming along the highway, wind roaring around him, Ben has to bite back a whoop as he overtakes Alec. He laughs as his brother overtakes him in turn, again. They've been playing like this for the last fifty miles or so and it's reckless and joyful. They can almost forget their troubles and pretend to be normal guys out on the deserted road, with twilight coming in, and going dangerously fast. But they're not, not normal and not carefree.

   Which is why they jumped at the chance to leave Seattle for a long weekend on an errand, even though it means over 18 hours of driving each way. They've traveled fast through Washington state, then zipped across the north of Idaho before the I90 took them south-east through Montana and Wyoming then east into South Dakota. Leaving the Interstate at Rapid City they headed south to what used to be Wind Cave National Park.

   After the Pulse, National Parks had become not even an afterthought for America and its government. They, along with other similar places, were sold off or acquired by various military, government and private organizations, Manticore among them. In fact, Manticore got hold of so many sites of various sizes and types, all over the country, that they never got round to using even a tenth of them. Renfro made Ben memorize the files of all the unused sites. 

 

   The end of their outward journey finds Alec following Ben as he makes his way through the maze of the Wind Cave system. They quickly leave those parts where guided tours used to run and move into the lesser used parts. There's a map tucked into his back pocket, but Ben can still remember the route he took last time he was here.

   "You know, I still can't quite grasp that Renfro wasn't Manticore through and through." Alec comments quietly. 

   "I'm not quite sure how she managed to play so many sides at once." Ben replies. "Manticore, the Committee, the DOD, the Familiars, Sandeman..."

   "Who's side do you think she was really on?"

   "No idea. Just her own probably."

   "Probably." Alec agrees. "I can't believe you had to pretend to be having sex with the Bitch. You _were_ only pretending weren't you?

   Glancing over his shoulder, Ben takes in the half-concerned grimace on his brother's face, and laughs a little. "Don't worry, I wasn't screwing her. I've told you, the excuse was the only way to get time away from the cameras.” He says reassuringly, then grins, “I don't think it would have been possible to unfreeze her thighs enough for me to get between them anyway."

   "Eww."  
   "There are worse prospects than Elizabeth Renfro."  
   "Name one."  
   "Your boss."  
   "Our boss. You work there too."  
   "Your boss. He thinks I'm you." 

   For the past couple of weeks since he'd been welcomed so easily into Alec and Max's lives, something which he's still thankful for, he's worked one day a week at Jam Pony in Alec's stead. Max had wanted Ben to work there full time, but he'd been reticent at the idea of throwing himself so wholeheartedly into life among the Ordinaries. He hadn't worked a normal job since before his psychotic break, and even then his age and Zack's paranoia had restricted his options. So, Alec had come up with the plan of easing him into it starting with one day a week, with the added buffer of working there as Alec rather than as himself. Max hadn't been that enthused, but between the two of them, they'd persuaded her rather easily. The clincher was that Alec had pointed out to her that it means he has extra time to work in and for TC. Of course, it also gives him an alibi if he decides to do something illegal on Ben's days, but he'd only told Ben that part.

   Before he started working there, he'd realized, of course, that the owner of Jam Pony had an admiration for Alec. He had found it funny when he found out the level of his man-crush. It became less funny after Ben found himself having to put up with the fawning himself. One day a week of that is more than enough for him; he doesn't know how Alec puts up with it the rest of the time. Other than that, it's fun to pretend to be Alec.

   The only Ordinaries who know about the ruse are Original Cindy and Sketchy. The latter had been let in on it to stop him talking about Ben where Normal would hear – the plan to surprise Normal with the fact that Alec has a twin is still in the pipeline. Even the other Jam Pony employees who'd been at Crash when Ben was exposed haven't caught on. 

   Less fun, but strangely amusing, is watching Max struggle with how to act each Wednesday. She obviously doesn't want to treat Ben badly, but she doesn't want to bring attention to him by acting any differently than she does the rest of the time. It had kind of brought it home to her exactly how she's treated Alec since he started working at Jam Pony. She'd also found out about some of the assumptions their colleagues had made because of it. She'd nearly thrown a shit-fit when she realized that some of them thought that she was punishing Alec for having rejected her advances. When he found out, Alec had laughed so hard he'd cried.

   In regards to Max, it hasn't all been clear sailing. She's clearly been having issues with Ben spending time with Alec or with the other Transgenics. With Alec, he supposes it's do to with their already bumpy relationship. As for the others, since he hasn't told her who he's been spending time with or why, he isn't quite sure what her problem is.

   Then there's Eyes Only and Max's strange relationship with him. After being introduced, Ben's previous dislike of him had been confirmed, and he'd made no secret of the fact. Logan, in contrast, had tried his best to hide his dislike and discomfort, but his attempts had been in vain. That was due to some Xs having seen Alec return from Logan's in a vile mood that first day, and having overheard his angry mutterings. From that, they concluded that Logan had said some things about Ben that had upset Alec. When Ben and Max had returned from collecting his things, she'd overheard them in turn, and become upset herself. So, Max has spent the last few weeks trying to smooth things over and force he and Logan to become friends. It hasn't worked, of course.

 

   “How's your training going?” Alec's question interrupts his train of thought.

   “Ok, I think.” Ben answers, “It's still embarrassing that so many of the X6s can kick my ass.” Alec snickers. “I guess I should be thankful that being an X5 gives me an edge over those on the same level as me.”

   “Don't worry, we'll have you up to scratch sooner than you think.” Alec jostles him good naturedly, “And Clara's enjoying herself overseeing your program for now.” She most certainly is. Which is embarrassing in a whole other way – being bossed around by his fourteen year old sister. At least it was allowing them to get to know each other and learn to become siblings.

   “She's bossy.”

   “No, she isn't.” Alec laughs, “Believe me, as our sisters go, she is nowhere near bossy. Remind me to introduce you to Milly.”

   That had been a big surprise, finding out how many times Manticore tended to use each genetic template. It had worked out well for the Transgenics, as it meant that nearly all of them were a part of a big brood of siblings. Which was even more true for those who were from a genetic template that was related to one of the other templates. 

   “Well, if Clara's not bossy, I'd appreciate it if you didn't put my training in the hands of any of the others.”

   “We'll see.” 

   “Wonderful.” Ben murmurs dryly. He stops and gestures through a cleft that leads into an antechamber, letting Alec go through first. Once inside, he swings his torch around the walls, pausing on each of the old fashioned oil lamps he'd left in place. In minutes they've lit the lamps and Ben is watching Alec examine the chamber. It's not that big, but it's far from claustrophobic. There's an intricate calcite formation on one side, and a few natural ledges perfect for sleeping on on the other.

   The other man quickly finds the small temperature and water proof box that Ben had stashed in the chamber. An Ordinary would have taken much longer, if they'd have found it at all. He brings the box over and Ben works the combination lock to open it before handing it back. Alec stares into the box while Ben makes himself busy sorting their camping gear.

 

   “Huh.” Ben looks up at his brother's quiet utterance. “Fancy us having to be thankful to Renfro. To her foresight and her drive to screw everyone else over, for getting hold of a complete copy of Manticore's databases.”

   “Yeah.” 

   “She really managed to get three copies of the files without any of the other staff knowing?” Alec asks quietly.

   “Yes. As far as I know.” Ben answers patiently. Alec has asked this half a dozen times at least since Ben told him. “You've spoken to the IT model who made the copies for her. Flash is sure that nobody caught him.”

   “Because Ordinaries don't notice the ITs if they don't want to be noticed.” Alec murmurs, nodding.

   “Mm hmm. And the techie ones can't be beat on computers, so no one else will have known about Renfro's contingencies. Including the virus that she had Flash embed in the Seattle system to destroy it, if the Committee ordered the cauterization”

   “Well, that certainly explains why it is that those tasked with destroying us have been working with such poor information.” Alec closes the box and comes over to help. “Ames White would probably give his left testicle for what's in this box.” Ben chuckles and passes him a bedroll. “I'm just thankful that Manticore is so twisted and devious that they've managed to make everyone believe that the Seattle and defunct bases like Wyoming were all there was.”

   Standing up, Ben rests his hand lightly on Alec's arm. “We'll find where they've hidden the young ones.” He squeezes lightly, “It'll just take time. And at least we know they're still alive.”

   A week before, Dix and Luke had managed to track down and then hack into the email accounts of a load of retired Manticore employees. One of the X5's former trainers, they found, had been approached about returning to Manticore to take over the administration of the training programs for the X8s, X9s and new generation of X5s. The news had traveled through TC like wildfire, setting everyone abuzz with hope and relief.

   When Ben had heard, he'd gone in search of Alec and found him hidden among the machinery inside the cupola of the Municipal Tower. For once, it had been Ben comforting Alec, as Alec poured out his fears for the little ones and the others still under Manticore's control. The other man has spent all these months feeling that it is his fault that they were and have continued to be betrayed, and that so many of their kind have been killed as a result. Such beliefs are baseless, but show just how strongly Alec feels his responsibilities. 

   They'd stayed at the top of the Tower for hours talking about their people and the problems facing them. Eventually they'd come to the subject of Manticore's files and Ben had nervously told Alec about the mission that had taken him away from the base in the days before Eyes Only had broadcasted their location. Finding out that Renfro had taken Ben into her confidence had shocked Alec, but learning that Ben had been responsible for hiding copies of Manticore's database was excellent news. When Ben admitted that he'd made further copies, he'd been even more elated.

   So here they both were, collecting one of the original copies from where Ben had stashed it. They were simultaneously making an initial survey of the Manticore-owned, former National Park to see if they could discreetly make use of it themselves. Two missions for the price of one and an opportunity for a bonding road trip on the side. 

 

   Having arranged their gear to their satisfaction, the brothers settle down to the serious business of consuming the pile of junk food they'd brought with them. It's the X5 version of a simple meal. Hey, just because they're camping doesn't mean they have to do the whole camp stove shtick. 

   “I haven't had much chance to check on how you're getting on with the other Xs.” Alec says, sounding apologetic.

   “That's ok.” Ben shrugs and smiles. “The other members of our Platoon have been helping with the introductions and stuff.” It gives him a warm glow to say “our Platoon” to his brother, though he still misses his original unit. But it's been over a decade since he was part of Unit 1, and he's Platoon C now. 

   “And they've been ok with you?” 

   “They've been great.”

   After some hesitation, his new platoon had begun to include him, to welcome him in their territory – maybe even for his own sake, and not just for Alec's. Either way, it's wonderful to be part of a group again and to, however tentatively, belong among his own kind. 

   They, along with Alec and Clara, have helped him start to get past the lingering remains of his childhood fear of the Nomlies and to learn how to interact with the Transhumans without fear. Though, he thinks, they've all been very careful with their choice of which Transhumans and Anomalies to introduce him to. Like Joshua, who treats Alec and Max like beloved younger siblings and is so kind and gentle with everyone. Like Cleo, who fusses over Alec like a mother hen, and has decided to extend that care to Ben. His interactions with Mole have been kept to a minimum, but Ben is slowly getting used to his gruff demeanor. Each introduction to one of the Transhumans or X Series Anomalies has been a test, and he knows he's being watched. He doesn't mind being tested, he just hopes that he passes: he doesn't want to let Alec down.

   “Are we spending the whole day tomorrow scouting the park? Or are we leaving early.”

   “The whole day.” Alec shrugs. “We've got the time, I don't have to be at work till late Tuesday morning. So we may as well make the most of it.”

   “Does Max know where we are?” Ben asks, smiling when Alec just gives him a 'duh' look in response. “Right. Telling her when we get back, got it.”

   “Not telling her at all.” Alec snorts. “Don't know about you, but I don't feel like dealing with whatever response she comes up with.” Ben doesn't either. He loves Max, of course he does but, Blue Lady, does she have control issues. She's almost as bad as Zack.

   Pouring the crumbs from his jumbo packet of chips into his mouth, Alec crumples the bag and throws it aside. He pulls a pack of cards out of his bag and gestures towards Ben, “Why don't we see if you learned any card games on the outside that I don't know?”

   “Sure. Any particular kind?”

   “Surprise me.”

   Ben smiles and leans forwards eagerly. “Do you know Mau Mau?”


	28. Epilogue

   Ben slips half regretfully out of the warm bed and away from the warm woman that it contains. It was a delightful tumble, but the morning after can be so awkward. Especially, when the the other person works at the same place as both your twin brother and the girl who is determined to see you as the youngster you haven't been for a decade.

   It had been stupid really, to go to her bed, but she'd flirted so determinedly, and he hadn't been laid since before the last time he returned to Seattle, months ago. It was just so easy to give in and enjoy.

   Leaning over, he pulls the covers up over her bare shoulders. Humans get colder so much easier than Transgenics and the least he can do after a lovely night is make sure she doesn't catch a chill. He takes a piece of scrap paper from the table and quickly folds it into a simple flower, which he leaves on her pillow as an apology for slinking off into the dawn: No need to piss the girl off too much. It might get back to Max and cause her to find a way to blame Alec – like Ben isn't perfectly capable of pissing off women on his own, he thinks with a silent snort.

   After exiting the building, Ben makes his way to the nearest market, where he grabs a couple of greasy breakfast sandwiches from a stall vendor and meanders back towards Terminal City. He's supposed to meet Clara for an early morning training session and food always puts her in a good mood.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   A couple of hours later in TC, Biggs is thrust into wakefulness by the sound of something smashing against the other side of his bedroom wall. “For fuck's sake.” He growls.

   He can hear the screaming row between the two X5's in the apartment next door. It's the third one this month and is a perfect example of how accidental mating between Transgenics can cause unending shit. No doubt they'll be on the outs for the coming week and will put the rest of their Platoon on edge. This is why Transgenics try their damnedest to avoid the perils of having sex, whether it's due to heat or otherwise, with other members of their Platoon. 

   Sex or Romance + Failed Relationship + Same Platoon = TARFU

   Giving up on his hopes of a lie in, he drags himself out of bed. He may as well earn some Brownie points and get into work early. He suddenly remembers that Alec owes him a late brunch and brightens at the thought of food on someone else's dime.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   “Here you go, dear.”

   Alec smiles sweetly at the old lady as she places his tip into his hand, “Thank you, ma'am.”

   “Such a polite young man.” She pats his arm indulgently, “Quite a rarity these days. Your parents must be very proud.” He ducks his head shyly. As she shuts the door he drops the act and rolls his eyes. 

   Yeah, he's just positive that Daddy Deck and Mommy Renfro would be sooo proud if they saw him now. He takes a moment to imagine the humorous idea as he heads down the corridor to the stairs. His strange thoughts are interrupted by a text message.

  
**_U owe me brunch. 30min @ Papi's. Bring plenty of cash.  
_**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   Halfway down the stairs of her apartment building, Max starts to curse. Putting her motorcycle down, she fishes her cell phone out of her pocket. It's a convenience, having a way for Logan, Joshua, Ben and Cindy to get a hold of her quickly and easily, but it's also an inconvenience because now Alec and Mole can also get hold of her quickly and easily.

   Speak of the lizardy devil himself. “What is it Mole?” She snaps into the cell, “I don't need the daily chivying, I'm already on my way.” 

   “We're low on gasoline.” The Transhuman answers her, managing to keep his tone even. “Everyone coming in from outside is being asked to bring some in with them. Just thought you'd want your chance to contribute.” 

   “Fine.” Max sighs, deflating with the realization that he's being reasonable for once. “I'll stop off and get some.”

   “You do that.” He cuts the call off with nary a thank you and she huffs with annoyance. 

   Looking up and down the stairwells, and canting her head to listen, she makes sure there's no one else around before once more picking up her Ninja and starting lightly downwards.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*  
 _(Max enters the building at Terminal City with a couple containers of gasoline.)_  
 _MAX: Gas up the generator. Got anything?_  
 _(Luke sits at the closed-circuit television sets.)_  
 _LUKE: It's all quiet on the transgenic front._  
 _MAX: Let's hope it stays that way._  
 _JOSHUA: Hey, little fella._  
 _MAX: Hey. Logan managed to grab this out of his apartment before White's guys trashed it. (Hands him his pendant)_  
 _JOSHUA: I'll have to thank him._  
 _MAX: Listen, about that symbol..._  
 _JOSHUA: Father told me that the two snakes interwind together._  
 _DIX: Sort of a caduceus. You know--the wand carried by Hermes, messenger of the gods._  
 _JOSHUA (to Max): Messenger, like you._  
 _DIX: The Greeks adapted it from a more ancient Babylonian symbol representing fertility. (Notices the others looking at him) I read a lot._  
 _MAX: All I know is it's the same symbol White's breeding cult uses. I hate to say this, but maybe Sandeman was involved with them somehow._  
 _JOSHUA: No, Max._  
 _MAX: These are major bad guys. I mean, I'm wondering if--_  
 _JOSHUA: I don't like you wondering. Father was a good guy. I remember._  
 _MAX: If you say so._  
 _LUKE: Good or bad, if Sandeman did create Manticore, he was one strange dude. I mean, look at us. What was he thinking?_  
 _DIX: And why did he bother? Humans hate us._  
 _MOLE: The feeling's mutual._  
 _JOSHUA: People afraid of things that they don't understand._  
 _(A voice comes over the monitors)_  
 _VOICE: All cars, we have a transgenic on the loose, heading eastbound towards..._  
 _LUKE: Uh-oh._  
 _MAX: What's going on?_  
 _LUKE: Transgenic. The cops got him on the run._  
 _MAX: Location?_  
 _LUKE: Sector five. Last seen headed east on Fourth. White's men are on their way._  
 _MAX: So are mine._

 _(At Jam Pony, Alec talks to a fellow male X-series, who is now employed there.)_  
_X-MESSENGER: No, first thing we ever did together was the Volkovitch job, over in Kezmekistan or wherever._  
_ALEC: Oh, yeah, that's right. Ooh, the off-hours were definitely the highlight of that mission._  
_BOTH: Lola._  
_ALEC: Yeah. (His cell phone rings) Hang on._  
_(He answers the phone)_  
_ALEC: Yeah?...We'll meet her there. (Hangs up) Let's go._  
*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   On the other side of the country, Reveille sounds out across Marine Corps Base Quantico and the remnants of Manticore's Arizona Platoon come to attention. Major Davis Stendhal runs his eyes along them, again feeling dismayed at the reduced size of his crack unit.

   They'd started out their specialized training barely equal to the size of the regular Manticore platoons. They'd lost some to training accidents and enemy fire on missions and lost others who didn't make the grade, but they'd completed their training as a workable number. In the last twelve months, they'd become even more reduced in size. It was a fucking crying shame. 

   It was one thing to have lost a fine soldier like X6RE-600 to a tactically demanded suicide, but it was another to loose them to the stupidity of Renfro, Lydecker and those god-damned pudknockers that make up the Committee. 

   Lydecker had mishandled the situation with X5RE-798, causing her to choose going AWOL over the baseless threat that her pregnancy would be terminated. As if that wasn't bad enough, there was the double loss of X5RE-494 and X5RE-453 due to the clusterfuck when Manticore was revealed by that interfering asshole Eyes Only. Speaking of him, Stendahl is looking forward to getting his hands around the bastard's neck, if someone else doesn't get there first. Judging from the looks on the faces of some of his soldiers, that's a distinct possibility.

   “You have been recalled from your previous assignments and mission placements to deal with a greater and more immediate threat.” He speaks low, knowing that his soldiers are paying avid attention, “You have been briefed on the Transgenic situation in Washington state. You soldiers are going to be an integral part of fixing that situation.” He scans their faces once more. “Soldiers, we have work to do.”

   “Sir! Yes, Sir!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Notes:  
>    TARFU = Things Are Really/Royally Fucked Up. Variation of SNAFU.
> 
> The italicized text marked out so:  
> *[text]*  
> is lifted from the transcript of the episode “Love Among the Runes”.


End file.
